Activity Stream

Activity Stream

  1. EmmaSweet added a comment on a blog entry NY Pride - reflections   

    Great to see you, Chrissy! I'm so glad to hear you had a nice time. I can well imagine doing it once and watching from the sidelines next year!
    • 2
  2. Chrissy added a blog entry in On Being...Me   

    NY Pride - reflections
    Hi all,
    It took me a little to figure out how to get my pics on here (apparently I can't do it on my phone, it has to be on a computer so that I can resize the pics).  Below are three pics - two of them show the top that I wore for Pride - they gave us the t-shirts for marching with NYU, I modified mine, cuz ya know, boobs. It worked out nicely since the "Y" in "NYU" is centered so that I could cut the V into the top of it. One of these also shows the Trans pride flag that I had for the march :-)
    The march itself was fun, except for the beginning. We met at our staging area at 3:30 p.m. and didn't step off until 5:30 - it gets really hard standing around one area for 2 hours! But it was a lot of fun marching with NYU (this is the only year that I could do it as a current student, I didn't want to miss that). We had a couple of hundred people show up for our contingent (apparently about 1000 signed up, not all showed up of course).
    I broke off at around 7:00 (we were a little more than 1/2 way done with the march). Pattaya (my friend who does drag, who used to let me guest perform at her shows all the time) was doing a show at Le Singe Vert that ended at 8, so I didn't want to miss it. The last picture is of the two of us :-)
    So overall a good experience - I probably won't march again though, I'll just watch, it's more fun :-)  But this was the first Pride that I could do as physically a complete woman, so marching seemed right :-)  It also helped me overcome some of the ambivalence I have over identifying as transgender. When it came down to it, I marched carrying a trans pride flag, so clearly I'm ok identifying as such.

    • 2
  3. EmmaSweet added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Hi Chrissy,
    Thank you, I'm looking forward to returning to my new home area in Seattle, where I am more confident that all will be okay. That said, I am making plans to have my hair styled in a more feminine way - as best I can until it grows out even more - and then using public transportation to travel around the city, to the conference center, various professional appointments with doctors, therapists, and just being myself. Even with the encouragement I've received I am apprehensive. Most of my worries are about looking "okay" but I felt that chill and fear yesterday. I remember the men's eyes, following me and not in a friendly way. Maybe they weren't threatening, perhaps just curious. I hope it's mostly the latter.
    • 3
  4. olcharlie added a topic in Transgender Rights & Political Activism   

    Istanbul Trans Pride march to go on despite govt ban
    Jul 2, 4:42 AM EDT
    ISTANBUL (AP) -- Transgender rights activists say they will go on with a planned march in Istanbul despite the governor's ban.
    The rights group Istanbul LGBTI, host of the 8th Trans Pride March, said on social media it won't recognize the ban. The march is to begin at 5 p.m. (1400 GMT) Sunday in central Taksim Square.
    More here:
    • 0 replies
  5. Chrissy added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    This is such a great, concise way of summing up the experience of transitioning. I've said a number of times to friends that the past couple of years have been the most amazing, and the most terrifying years of my life - and neither term adequately expresses the actual feelings behind them.
    I hope that the "I'll be fine" part continues to outweigh the "but..." part!
    • 2
  6. EmmaSweet added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Hey Blue, I'm now in the Yukon Territory, just north of British Columbia. You'd love it. Miles and miles of trees, rolling hills and mountains, streams, rivers and lakes, and everything a rainbow of greens, every shade, every color. I'm like a birder as I drive along, often not seeing another vehicle for five minutes or more, wondering what type of tree I'm seeing. I think I need to buy a book on trees. 
    It's so beautiful and yet, as I entered another campground today I couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable as men checked me out, wearing titanium studs in my ears, my gray hair getting a bit longer than male. 
    The scenery is fantastic. I've seen black bears, bison, goats, and others along the roads. I expect to see mire and more and am finally keeping my camera locked and loaded by me seat. Still, I feel that I should keep to myself as I fear recourse from others who might sense an opportunity to make a point. I think I'll be fine, but...
    • 4
  7. bluemoon added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    I was just thinking what an adventure you are on even before you used the word. I also realize how difficult that decision can be because my last moving decision was such a tradeoff. I am such a nature lover and love being surrounded by trees and wilderness and ocean, if possible, or at least a sense of wilderness with as few cars, traffic, and pollution of all types, including air, water, radiation, and light pollution. On the other hand, I love gourmet and natural/organic foods and ethnic foods like thai, indian, and sushi. Nature place was a wasteland for good restaurants, natural foods, and even good produce, which I really need.. Some other huge factors too that made it such a difficult decision and two different possible kinds of lives.
    • 4
  8. KarenPayne added a comment on a blog entry Transforming   

    I'm two years in transition wise and have noticed the male privilege aspect but have grown to not let this bother me as the pluses outweigh the loss of privileges. In regards to makeup, I only wear it for going out for the evening on a date or out with friends. What has become more important over the past few years in proper skin care which includes a trip to a salon (actually heading there now) for a facial.
    • 3
  9. Briannah added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    I'm on my iPad and it's harder to type so forgive bad typing and weird syntax.  Spent yesterday checking out target town and it was surprisingly awesome.  The park is so big and twisty we actually got lost and it took nearly an hour and Nikki trying to drive on a pedestrian only path to find our way back out.  Lol.  The Victorian is a no go it has a five foot deep back yard.  But the modern looking second house of which I have zero idea what style name to call it is in a lovely location and workable yard.  It's been on the market six months so there is a chance it will still be there.  Here's hoping.  The Chinese food at the restaurant we tried for lunch wasn't bad either.  Target town has hills   I've been living on the flat pancake of the 
    I feel a little more like Emma now and maybe this can be an adventure instead of crazy.  
    • 4
  10. olcharlie added a topic in Transgender Rights & Political Activism   

    Checkpoint On eve of deadline, Pentagon delays plan to allow transgender recruits by 6 months
    By Dan Lamothe June 30 at 10:47 PM
    Defense Secretary Jim Mattis has delayed a plan approved by the Obama administration a year ago to begin allowing transgender recruits to join the U.S. military, providing the Joint Chiefs of Staff with a six-month reprieve that they requested, the Pentagon said Friday night.
    The decision was made on the eve of a deadline set a year ago by then-Defense Secretary Ash Carter. The services can now delay processing transgender recruits until Jan. 1, following another review of accession plans and providing information about how doing so will affect the military and its lethality, Mattis said in a memo...
    More here:
    • 0 replies
  11. Kitrah added a comment on a blog entry Transforming   

    My best guess is that not all women wear makeup and some prefer not to. That what if someone want go heavy with bright eye shadows and look a canary that their business but i find that not to my liking. When see people who enjoy dress up and costume parties, it alway like a great inner world that allow to come to the surface. I like bright and flashy things and people who are fun to be around. Keeping my voice has become easier in some way but i definite feel the removal of male privilege within society. People tend take me less serious as well as my choice of transitioning to be almost a laughable joke to see how far it will go. Go through transition definite shake things up because everone will tell you where they stand or leave. I cant think of much reason why fight for this so hard other than it the truth. It cost me everything.
    • 2
  12. bluemoon added a post in a topic Victoria Secrets   

    I wear androgynous clothes in keeping with my androgynous intersex gender and generally prefer completely bare skin to lingerie, but I secretly love Victoria Secret.
    • 2
  13. Chrissy added a post in a topic Victoria Secrets   

    I'd suspect that not many stores are trans-unfriendly by policy, it depends more on whether they specifically have non-discrimination policies and enforce them from store to store.
    I've been to a VS in Jersey City and had no issues - don't buy much there because of prices :-(
    I've never encountered any direct hostility at any clothing stores, which is nice. Mist of my shopping is @ Kohl's and Loft, both of which are totally friendly :-)
    • 2
  14. bluemoon added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Bri, life has too many stresses and scary things. It's all well and good to call them challenges, learning experiences, and all that, but things can be so much better and easier in theory and mind or fantasy than in the outside world. it would be nice to weed some out or at least have safe refuges from them within yourself, your relationships, and immediate surroundings. You seem to have that so much with Nikki as you chart your future and find and create your beautiful yard. Hope you find a buyer soon so that big piece of non-peace can fall away.
    • 5
  15. Briannah added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Hi Blue!  it's been a crazy ride, but as things are slowly pulling together I'm doing better.  I have had my disorders so long, and generally function around them so well, that I mostly actually forget they are there until I make a dumb choice like that and poke them hard and jump off the emotional cliff as it were.  It's why I always try to have backup plans for my backup plans, it's a coping mechanism for the terrorizing panic attacks I'm prone to.  Life, no one gets out unscarred. ​  
    I am eyeing a nice Victorian, it needs a lot of cosmetic work, but the price is low, but I'm a bit worried about the yard.  The yard looks like it won't work, and that's non-negotiable.  I'll live in a plain uncharismatic ranch with a gorgeous yard if I have to.  LOL Nikki says maybe two months to having this place ready to list, and then once we find a buyer a huge chunk of the current stress will lift off.  I have paralyzing freakouts that no one will want the house.  Nothing will make that go away until we close on the house.  Then we can focus on buying the next one and setting up for the new chapter of life.  Closer to my friend N happily. 
    • 5
  16. bluemoon added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Hi briannah, such a long time but am glad you feel better after making it through such a difficult period. I can barely imagine how agonizing that must have been with killer cat and still such a major loss even if it had to be plus other big things in flux and reorganization. all the best to you and nikki in the move to your target town and smart having backup plan too, but you seem to usually think of anything and everything so I wouldn't expect anything less. I'm glad we're both back now.
    • 4
  17. bluemoon added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Emma, I'm so happy for you with your wonderful, freeing inward and outward adventures into your true needs and desires, finding your way into where you are really home.
    • 3
  18. Briannah added a comment on a blog entry A Wonderful Experience   

    Oh you know, having a bit of  a breakdown after I had to put down my Murder Kitty at only five years old.    But ​Murder Kitty will not tolerate vet care, and while his condition was fixable, only with a LOT of constant vet care.  No one at our clinic has ever seen anything like his reaction to them.  So it was best to let him go quietly.  Then I tried to keep busy working on the great life reorganization plan, and I realized the great life reorganization plan exists outside of theory and had a panic breakdown.  It was a dumb idea on my part to agree to change EVERYTHING in my life at once.  I have deep seated security issues, and this amorphous shapeless mass of a future crushed me.  I should have known better.  I got so focused on what Nikki needed, somewhere in the last four months or so I sorta forgot I exist.  And my mom gave the only heirloom I ever wanted, that we fought over for years cuz she wouldn't even let me USE the dishes on holidays even though she never used them even once, to my cousin, and when I objected told me I'd never expressed any interest.  SO much fun realizing you don't exist for your family unless your standing in front of them.  But we're moving away sometime soon.  
    It's better now though.  NIKKI GOT A JOB!  Yup, he leaves his current crappy one in two weeks, and is getting a raise and a more responsible position.  And it's only an hour north of the city we wanted to live in, so tomorrow we're going to a small town that is exactly between his job and the city where we have friends and stuff to do, about a half hour either way, and see if we want to consider living there.  The other option is a city north of his job that is bigger, but further from target city.  So if we hate small town we have a fall back plan.  I'm sorta excited to go check this place out.  We still have to sell this house obviously, but Nikki's commute is only an hour until we do, and he's done longer commutes before.  He's gonna have a normal m-f schedule again.  Hooray!   And his current job that is eliminating his department in like two weeks still hasn't even communicated what was going to happen to him or my best friend who works there, so the timing was LOVELY.  I'm really happy for him, and me, and having a direction is giving that future a sorta shape.  It's still all amorphous and scary, but it's starting to have a definite shape which is making me feel better.  We're moving in with Mom in September until the house sells and we get a new one so we can offer immediate possession to the buyer and no stress trying to orchestrate the two transactions. 
    But I'm not crying in the corner anymore, so I'm back on the internet.   Missed ya!  
    • 3
  19. MonicaPz added a comment on a blog entry Transforming   

    Dear Kitrah and Emma,
    Have found women are very individual on this.
    Recall decades ago when I was a teenager that I babysat for a baby girl since she was three days old.  Both of her parents were 100% heterosexual and dressed casually (T-shirts and jeans) at every opportunity but their baby girl, with whom I was able to observe almost from birth growing up, insisted on dressing in "party" or "holiday themed" DRESSES at every opportunity!  Her parents did not understand where this came from!!
    Agree that APPROPRIATE is very important, as I have observed cisgender SENIOR women dressing like teens, another cisgender senior woman putting on so much makeup that she looked like a clown (LITERALLY!) as well as teenagers (like me) that dressed frumpy in their teens!
    The secret is to be appropriate for your age and occasion, yet retain your "voice."
    Your friend,
    • 4
  20. EShaver added a post in a topic Victoria Secrets   

    ​Your manager was correct in that some Vitoria Secret stores are indeed Trans friendly more so than other stores . By that , some stores are truly WANTING our business.
    • 3
  21. EShaver added a post in a topic Dr. Kathy Rumer - GRS in Philadelphia   

    Chrissy, I have had the pleasure of meeting and knowing Dr Rumer at Virginia TIES, now twice . She helped inaugurate the 1st Virginia health conference in 2012. She came well prepared and it was my actual first time being able to have a one on one with any surgeon . I have no clue who is scheduled at the fourth year of Virginia TIES other rthan I have begged, pleaded and begged even more to see this conference expanded into something that include more time .

    It was a BIG step first for Equality Virginia to have taken my chiding from years earlier as the director , James Parrish once told me that he thought the Transgender population in Virginia barely could hit 900 people and that was in 2010. He know I had my facts together and as a result , Virginia Ties came to Virginia Commonwealth University at the student commons center for the now one day event . I have been a Equality volunteer since the beginning and I look forward to again doing so this October .

    Virginia TIES is THE Come to event for all Transgender and those wishing information on the meaning of being Transgender. Subjects range from Legal issues with Medicare / Medicaid to surgical procedures . I continue to push for a dress for success class as this applies to Cross dressers as well. There is simply too much Information that BEGS to be shared to the community as a whole here and one day is simply not enough to take it all in . A social gathering at a nearby bar closes the day and all participants are treated to two complimentary drinks via Equality Virginia .

    I look forward to meeting ANYONE willing to travel to Richmond Virginia this fall to attend the event . Bring a notebook as I'm on hand to share knowlee , resources and any pertinent information I can
    • 1
  22. EmmaSweet added a comment on a blog entry Transforming   

    Hi Kitrah,
    Sounds great! Good for you. Dressing appropriately - which I read as dressing as cis women in similar situations dress - is a challenge for me, too. I find myself drawn by all the ads for pretty dresses and outfits! But as I look around at other women I see that I would stand out in a way that I'd prefer not to. So even though I think we'd all agree that women have a much wider range of acceptable dress there are unsaid rules that we need to get to know. The answer for me, then, is to keep my eyes open to what women are wearing, for clothes, makeup, accessories - all of it. 
    Best of luck with your name change!
    • 3
  23. Kitrah added a blog entry in Kitrah   

    My next plan going be to change the name legally and i send off for paperwork to get that all in order. my birth state is one lucky one where they will correct the sex marker with letter from doctor so that going be taken care of easier than i thinking. I want get everthing done in order so i will have sex marker changed and then file for the name change and then get driver license again. My plan for next year will be just finish SRS since it is covered under my health insurance so far. I hope there won't be problem in US with the senate that going make this harder for me accomplishing.
    I start to attend a local group meeting for other transgender that have been helpful just to see other who going through same situation. That something that you can't get online, a sense of community so i have thankful to get meet some new people. Some people I have ran into lately have had no problem with use right pronouns and name. I love when that happens but then there are the few who want to remain a challenge and talk about things in a negative light. I choose more to be around those who making me feel good instead of those who just make me terrible.
    Dressing correct still pose challenge, it just difficult and i not used to it or the reactions. i buyed a few more dresses and blouse that i been trying to mix in. All this things really do matter. I think what i find interesting about the gender idenity is that the more i going with and choose to be who i really am, the harder it is to try to be who im not and the happier i am overall. coming from position where i never would have believe this would make me happy, it take a lot of courage and self examine to real know who i am and let go of the delusion of what i wish i am. i think that an important thing to unerstand that with transgender who is buried in the false indenity it is impossible to be happy because you are not being who you really are, but what you think others want you to be or for me, the easy route that going be most socially acceptable.
    So that why it take a lot of courage to be youself and keep your head up. Each day seem present all this challenges, but the hormones have lit my life up with purpose and genuinely more happy than ive ever been. being able see a positive outcome out of all this makes each day better. and wear makeup actually fun. i dont have to pretend i dont like things i really do like anymore and that make all the difference. hope everone have a great day! 
    • 4
  24. cross2play added a post in a topic Topical analgesic for epilation   

    Very good interesting read about Epilation, however personally for me, I just shave everyday or every other day, I just old fashioned traditional but I would like to try electrolysis, once you get used to shaving it becomes more available in practice makes perfect.
    Visit Shazy Jeo on YouTube channel videos and start subscribing !
    • 1
  25. EmmaSweet added a comment on a blog entry My next Step   

    Hey Charlotte, good for you! What kind of a style do you think you'll get or ask for? Is your hair already pretty long?  
    I'm growing out my hair now and plan on having it styled in August, although it won't be fully grown out by that time. I've been collecting photos pf styles I like (on my laptop) to show to the stylist so she can tell me what is reasonable for me, what is not, and I hope, make it all look nice!
    • 3