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  1. Chrissy


    I did change my gender marker pre-surgery on everything except my birth certificate (NJ requires bottom surgery before you can change that, but that should change next year when we lose our current pathetic governor). 

    Another consideration for a lot of people is access to surgery, not everyone has the resources to get them done. 

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  2. Chrissy


    I remember after Sandy my power was out for about a week, and the most frustrating thing was seeing that it was coming on near me, but I went another couple of days without 😞 Not a fun experience!

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  3. Kitrah


    well that nice for him to do that. sometime when people talk to me, they real dont understand gravity of what they talk. i do the same thing some time also because i only can see thing from my perseptive. i try sometime to see thing from other point of view. when i first start this transition i had intent to keep thing the way it is because it is how i was made. my view have change and this remain interesting for me. i rememer when i first start to come to tgguide. i didn't care what people call me shemale or tranny. i think sometime this come from fact that i was bullied for be this way. so now he knows more so there is no worry. :)

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  4. EmmaSweet


    I agree, Kitrah, if I had just told him that I'm trans. But I had done it earlier, he'd provided his support via email, and earlier in the dinner told me that he'd told his parents who knew me well when I was a child and in high school. His father remarked that I'd make a pretty woman - which was a big surprise! I thus think that his "genital mutilation" comment came from what he really thought although it wasn't given with any disdain or negative baggage. 

    He did respond to my email and apologized, saying that his ignorance was really on display. So, we're all good!

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  5. Kitrah


    Hi,

    it sound like the hurricane real affect you. i watch some youtube video on it and it don't look good. sound like you lucky in this consider how terrible this hurricane can get. 

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  6. EmmaSweet


    Good for you, Kitrah! Tomorrow I'm meeting a doctor where I hope she will prescribe what I need to start HRT. I am very much looking forward to it!

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  7. Kitrah


    Great job Chrissy with your presentation. My thought for trangender medicine are as follow. The body with introduction of hormone of opposing sex make things to happen regardless of personal beliefs. There are cases when thai boys are given estrogen and sold as lady boys into prostitution at young age. Because of the suceptible nature of children and the growing popularity of the internet and a growing amount of transgender people as a result, i question if this is awareness as much as it is going be about issues like insecurity, being bullied, or blindly following others down a long road that unwittingly lead to sterilization. It's also possible that the awareness has made it easier to talk about. Had things been different for me, maybe I would have fathered children. Given my roll of the dice, I dont think that going to happen.

    Medical tests that should have been perform for me, were not and i had to live in secrecy for year and years afraid to tell anyone. Because of the length of time I have not been expose to tetosterone (almost my entire life) and the already existent amount of estrogen within my body, it easy to see why I chose the latter even though I am biological male. I do not want to put myself through the upheaval of dealing with large amounts of testosterone now when i have lived my life without it. That why I am a TransWoman because I choose to be it. It makes sense to me why I could not be a man and why I dont want to take the elixir of T. 

    Whether my identity as a transwoman arose at young age due to the lack of testosterone or was inherent in me since birth is a mystery. I'm not focus on that. I'm happy to live as I am now. The estrogen was scary for me as well as changing genders, but illusions fall aside and the truth reveals itself. This internal conflict of living a false identity resolved itself and I felt PEACE. I did it for myself and not others. I hope those who choose to transition, consider the same. The estrogen gave me confidence in myself and made me love who I am and I never experience this when i identified as male.

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  8. Chrissy


    Wow, "genital mutilation." What does one say? My GCS surgeon was on a panel I saw yesterday and my thought was "she's the person who made me (physically) right." Far cry from "mutilation" ☺

    I'm not surprised on the sexual orientation part, even LG people seem to often have a problem knowing the difference between gender identity and sexual orientation.

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  9. EmmaSweet


    It's certainly worth it! Have fun, that's the most important prime directive!

    That said, try to look and be aware of how women dress in your area for various errands, nights out, etc. Yesterday I talked with another trans woman who's planning to attend a gender conference soon. My advice to her was to wear something comfortable (and sure, pretty) with flats. 

    You're certainly prepared for a night out on the town, though. Don't be shy to strut your stuff girl!

    Emma

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  10. Chrissy


    Karen,

    I'm so sorry to hear that - hopefully they'll both be fine, but it's still a difficult process to go through :-(

    And great point about getting checked! I've been more assertive about talking with my doctor and endocrinologist to understand what things I need to be watching for that I might not have before (of course that's also part of getting older - but never mind that!!!)

    xoxo

    Chrissy

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  11. Briannah


    Today we are both broken, exhausted human beings.  I injured my ankle but good, so I'm limping around like a lame horse, but we got a LOT done.  We also during the packing and moving process took a hard look at the things we own and got rid of at least a third of it all, maybe half, it's hard to judge when it's all in a pile of boxes vs, in it's normal position around the house.  It does seem like less boxes than the last move though.  And the couch isn't in great shape anymore, it was a cheap couch that lasted like 10 years, so we jettisoned that too and will just save up to get a nicer one after we move.  We have plenty of really comfy folding camp chairs and zero gravity lounges we can put in the living room until we find one we like.  

    I also see how many of my bad habits came from my childhood, normalized permanently into me.  I can't ever undo that, no matter what people say.  Our life experience is our life experience and it colors who we are and how we are in the world.  What I can do is learn to identify it and control that part of me instead of being controlled, and having far more success learning better ways and keeping to them.  I can see how a thing is better, and normalize that into my brain too so I consciously have choices and make them.  45 and I'm still figuring it all out.  Grandpa told me I'd never stop learning til I die when I was very young and frustrated with school because if felt like it was just reiterating and they'd taught us everything, and he taught me a new thing to prove it.  I think he also cemented the ideaology of learning on my own outside the system into my subconscious mind that day, where beforehand I had been socialized by both family and school system that school was everything and anyting not included wasn't important (ah, the 70s elementary education system).  Thanks grandpa for saving me from myself. :) ​ He was literally the best, most caring, and most nurturing parental figure in my life.  I wish his life hadn't been cut so short, I really would have liked him to meet NIkki and see me finally get my life together.  :) ​ 

    I guess I should go back to cleaning, sit down break is over and time to test the ankle.  And Nikki might want to eat at some point, and right now I'm the only person here who knows where any of the food is.  I'm important!  LOL

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  12. Briannah


    From my experience after Nikki finally came out to me, there was a long period where everything was constantly different, and typical was a think of the past, but now a year and a half later, typical has reasserted it just looks different than it did before.  However, that doesn't HAVE To be true.  It's true for Nikki and I because we are both at our core creatures of habit and homebody types for the most part.  I know friends who live everyday like a new adventure, in truth, not just a platitude, and 'typical' for them means doing something they've never tried before.  If you like your old sense of typical, it will come back.  If you didn't or like the new one better, it's yours for the taking!  And with the modern age of internet, you can literally find anything you want out there, from toys of childhood (hides her Ebay spending on My LIttle Ponies, nothing to see here!) to full transgender specifically designed altering items from wigs down to shorts with a silicone vagina (I have seen things on the internet helping Nikki figure out what things he does and doesn't want!) to illegal things we won't discuss, but the point is you can find ANYTHING you can imagine, you just have click a few things on google.  Get out and explore girl!  

    Monica is completely right.  I have a few, but they are from my anime cosplaying and more effort in hallloween than my current lazy rear end puts into it days.  I will admit I have put some thought into getting a really high end green one that I don't have to keep touching up my hair since they don't make permanent green dye, but my  natural hair is hot and summer reminds me I might not like wearing one all the time.  Nikki wasn't interested in them at all, has plenty of hair he just has me do it on girl days and days I want to practice a new hair idea on (I find it easier to master on someone else's head before trying it on my own where I can only see half of what I'm doing, and he gets a kick outta doing the girls day stuff with me).  Now my ex-mother in law once had a massive emotional breakdown because I once accidentally saw her without her wig.  You'd think I just murdered her youngest child in front of her or something from the other the top reaction of me coming home an hour earlier than I was expected and seeing her without it as she was in the kitchen.  (I lived there for less than a month, you can imagine why!).  Then there was a hissy fit of how was she supposed to be able to supper herself and my brother in law without the rent money I was paying(on a place she'd been living for three years before I MET my ex-husband, and the three years before I married him).  Apparently wigs are nearly a sacred item for some people, regardless of the cause for them wearing them.  

     

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