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TechCherry3g : (23 November 2014 - 01:40 PM) hello friends
Serenity : (22 November 2014 - 02:16 PM) Hello
MonicaPz : (22 November 2014 - 11:12 AM) Worth a look!  There is several versions and you can make your own.  Also, check out "behind the scenes" . . .
UsernameOpti... : (22 November 2014 - 09:53 AM) :lol:
CharityLynnC... : (22 November 2014 - 09:10 AM) http://www.elfyourse...?mId=61745695.3 look im an elf breakdancing...lol
MonicaPz : (21 November 2014 - 07:05 PM) Think the young man is a really good comic!
TechCherry3g : (21 November 2014 - 11:26 AM) Hello everyone. Hope everyone is having a good day.
ComedianSale... : (21 November 2014 - 01:39 AM) <p>Super shameless plug. Transgender Stand Up Comedian.. Writer and funny fat guy. Anyone bring popcorn?</p>https://www.youtube....h?v=9vN7mtQltgI
ComedianSale... : (21 November 2014 - 01:38 AM) Super shameless plug. Transgender Stand Up Comedian.. Writer and funny fat guy. Anyone bring popcorn?
yorley : (20 November 2014 - 07:25 PM) hi every one how are u all doing
yorley : (20 November 2014 - 07:24 PM) hi ohw are ou all
UsernameOpti... : (20 November 2014 - 06:03 PM) It would be nice if the next TDOR had no new names on it...and that one day, there will be no need for that very somber event.
Serenity : (20 November 2014 - 02:35 PM) Hello people, I came back after for a long disappearence
Tellme : (20 November 2014 - 10:29 AM) Hi new here would like to chat In see what happens
Bonnie : (20 November 2014 - 04:53 AM) Today is Transgender Remembrance Day.  Please give a thought and/or a prayer for those who have died through violence or suicide.
TechCherry3g : (19 November 2014 - 03:51 PM) HI
Sprinkles75 : (18 November 2014 - 11:57 PM) hello all ... :) just wanted to say hi
TechCherry3g : (18 November 2014 - 08:35 PM) Hello
MichelleDT : (18 November 2014 - 12:27 PM) Hello all
Bobbisox : (16 November 2014 - 08:17 PM) I've been transdermal estradiol and anti androgen fo 7 mos





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An introduction!

Posted by suzettedefemme , 05 December 2011 · 157 views

Well, I suppose that i am writing this blog not only as a journal, but also as a bit of a release of the feelings, emotions and experiences that have led me here!
This is the story of the transformation from a supposed‘normal guy’, who had given everything, physically, emotionally and mentally, to try so desperately to save his marriage! All he recieved in return was simply to be pushed away by his wife, who said that she didn’t love him any more, and step kids, who simply used, or abused him (verbally with threats of physical!)  I knew that it would be a slow process. The healing, which had to take place, would take time, before the rebuilding could come, mentally, and emotionally, I had nothing left, I was on the verge of an intense breakdown, a black hole from which I knew there would be no escape, I no longer knew who I was, who I wanted to be, or what lay ahead.
The only thing I did understand that to stay would push me over the edge, and I would never come back, so I did what I had to, I got out!
There were many tears, many screams, times I just sat there numb. My new place is peaceful though, with lots of areas for walks and solitude, just what I needed to help me discover myself!
Then, in the depths of despair, i reached deep inside, and remembered a part of myself that i had hidden and suppressed for so long that i had almost forgotten, and, once again, just had she had done so many times before, Suzy reached out, and came to rescue me!
slowly, piece by piece, Suzy re-entered my life, helping me cope, helping me survive, giving me the strength to continue. Gradually, the realisation began to dawn on me, Suzette de Femme was not ‘guiding’, ‘inspiring’ or helping me to ‘rebuild my life’, no, it was far more than that, ‘Suzy’ was my life, my soul, and it was not Suzy who was helping me to carry on, it was SUZETTE who WAS getting on with my life!
Life’s still no bed of roses, and, I think, it never will be, though it does seem to be getting more ‘rose tinted’. The friends i’ve made through networking have been a fantastic support (thankyou again, love you all. x x x), and feedback so far has been very positive. I know that some things will take time, and others will hurt, but I’m so used to hurting now, and at least, I suppose, I have some measure of control over what happens next.
However, i have rediscovered some of my self belief, and I just know I’ll survive and become stronger.
I don't honestly know what the future holds for me at the moment, or the role i will eventually take, things are still very tense between myself and my ex, who is, at the moment putting immense pressure on me, especially regarding my stepson, whom i love to bits, and couldn't bear to lose, so i have to keep my true self hidden in most ways at the moment! I don't know whom i'm lying to more though, them or me!! Only time will tell, i suppose!
well, thats part of the story so far, there's more which is too painful to get out at the moment, maybe one day, but hopefully time to move forwards and start enjoying life again!
XXxxxx

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Thanks for sharing your story. We can all relate to elements of your experiences so you're among friends here. May you find your place on the transgender spectrum, along with happiness and fulfillment in life. :)
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PlagueBubonic
Dec 07 2011 11:01 AM
Dear Ms. Suezett
Sorry ,thing like that happened to you; you seem like a nice person. If I may add that this, thought life changing experance has help you embrace the truth about who you are; all the better for you!! Rembember life starts NOW!! and,
"that which does not kill us only makes us stronger."
Peace Out >^.^<
PS If you ever need a friend please look me up
I listen and try to help. BIG HUGZZZZ
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suzettedefemme
Dec 07 2011 04:01 PM
thankyou both so much, means so much to me at the moment! Xxxx
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