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UsernameOpti... : (18 December 2014 - 07:55 PM) Happy Birthday to stephani
MonicaPz : (18 December 2014 - 06:17 PM) Happy birthday, Stephani!
AshMich1945 : (18 December 2014 - 10:57 AM) Hello...my name when I'm transformed, is Ashleigh Michelle James. I'm a lifelong cd/tg from sw Connecticut. I've been fascinated by female attire and femininity since I was very young. Now that I'm mature, I can enjoy all the benefits of being a woman. I hope to meet many more members from CT and share my experiences with them as well as possibly go out for shopping trips, coffee latches and brunch.
CharityLynnC... : (16 December 2014 - 01:24 AM) lol
veronicabeta : (15 December 2014 - 10:16 PM) Recalling all the times I cursed "dial up" and was worried the Interweb might have become self aware !
UsernameOpti... : (15 December 2014 - 09:30 PM) Duct tape, bailing wire, bubble gum and a good hammer will usually fix nearly anything!
Lori : (15 December 2014 - 08:43 PM) Sorry about the outage today. We had server problems but banging on it with a hammer seemed to work! ;)
CharityLynnC... : (15 December 2014 - 08:22 PM) what in the world cause this site to be down for a day...lol..tried to get on and got an sql server error..
jennifer38 : (15 December 2014 - 10:56 AM) I plan to hold another conference this Saturday at 3 PM Eastern.  For those who came to the last one, the number and meeting ID are the same.  Anybody who does not have the number and is interested, please message me, as I've been advised to not openly post the number and ID for fear of them falling into the hands of troublemakers.  Also, anytime I bring up religion and The Bible, it is not meant to intimidate or embarrass anyone.  I'm sorry if anyone feels put down, because I have no intentions of doing so.  In spite of my transgender feelings, I have a deep love for Christ, but I respect those who don't believe like I do.  My goal of these telephone chats is simply to create a telephone hang-out for us fellow trans on all levels of the spectrum, and for our allies.  I hope to see you all there.
cross2play : (13 December 2014 - 07:57 PM) I cross dresser 1st time in days & walked on high street as her it was amazingly incredible : cdsing in moderation he he !
PamalaFlinn : (12 December 2014 - 02:56 PM) Jay P . I am in Baltimore sometimes.
MonicaPz : (12 December 2014 - 01:15 PM) Jen, it was great, and I can't wait!
jennifer38 : (12 December 2014 - 01:12 PM) I thank everybody who called into my telephone conference.  It was wonderful.  I feel good about talking to others and hearing their perspectives.  Lord willing, I will hold another one, soon.  The conference number and ID will always be the same.  I will let you all know when I plan to do this, again.  God bless you all.
JayPea25 : (12 December 2014 - 11:50 AM) Anyone in Baltimore!?
veronicabeta : (12 December 2014 - 12:16 AM) Dug the Vid Warren. T.Y.!
Bonnie : (11 December 2014 - 02:45 PM) Fun video, Warren, except for the ending.  The jumping while running hand in hand.  It is good to see a video like this though.  Thank you.
jennifer38 : (11 December 2014 - 11:41 AM) This is a reminder about my telephone conference, tomorrow afternoon at 3 EST.  Come out and enjoy yourself.  This is a general chat about our various transgender feelings and issues.  This is a great way to get to know one another better.  Details are in the calendar.  If you have any questions, please message me.  Hope to see you there, tomorrow.
EmmaSweet : (09 December 2014 - 10:13 PM) Cool, Warren! Good thing they had subtitles. My Japanese is pretty weak!
WarrenG : (09 December 2014 - 08:57 PM) I found this really interesting/adorable homosexual music video and thought I'd share it with you guys and girls ^_^ (i grabbed the one with english subtitles for you XD) https://www.youtube....h?v=xxyA26gJ22E
jennifer38 : (09 December 2014 - 11:08 AM) Here's the number and code for my telephone conference I plan for this Friday, now at 3 PM Eastern.  The number is (605) 562-0020.  The meeting ID is 201-909-465.  This will just be a general hang-out and chat about our transgender issues and feelings.  This will be another time I can be one of the girls, even though I cannot do that in everyday life.  We can just enjoy ourselves and get to know one another through good old-fashion talk.  Hope to see you all there.





Photo - - - - -

coping strategy 001

Posted by amie , 13 August 2010 · 82 views

On my last visit to the doctor I had my first experience of someone laughing at me in public as a transwoman.  I am reasonably sure the laughing was about me but I chose not to look as I passed by the two young men.  I felt like I was a little kid again, first day of school where someone made fun of what I was wearing.  Following the laughter was some real faint whispering, when the men began to chat more about what they just saw. (what is ironic is that the two men whispering sounded like what you would expect from some little girls, not boys) I mentioned the experience to my doctor and she asked me how I handled it.  I thought for a moment and came up with what I thought to be a pretty good plan of attack to this issue in my life.  She liked my response and said that it would be good for me to write it down.  I hope this thought process can also help someone else.


For that one moment in time that someone may laugh or discriminate against you is it worth suffering a lifetime in the wrong body by not transitioning, just to avoid those little moments?  After all, those little moments will pass again and again.  Then you will be left with all of the rest of the time that you must live with yourself.  So why not ignore the little moments and decide to be happy in the big moments of life; the moments that go on and on and have you in it.  The moments when you really live life in your work, in relationships and personal time.  

Right now it seems like the little moments are big moments, but they are not.  The real bad comments or looks are all passing moments usually from strangers.  The little moments can turn into big bad moments if I let these things bother me and ponder them for hours or days.  For every moment like that where I move on quickly,  I become a stronger person.  I learn that what matters most in my life is how I feel about myself (am I at peace with myself?)and my ability to live life to the fullest despite the challenges.

I look forward to the day that I can look back and say I did it!  I also look forward to each new day as I wish to try to enjoy the journey to womanhood to the best of my ability.  As of now I am more like a little girl learning a new way of life and slightly different method of relating to people than I am used to and I should enjoy all of these moments as realistically as possible as I didn't exactly get to live them out earlier in my life.

So in Summary... I am the one who lives with myself all of the time, my relationship with everyone else and the majority of my experiences with these people are only small moments in time.  Which part in time do I want to enjoy the little moments that pass, or the big moments that can even give birth to smaller little moments that really matter?

I choose life, my life, my way, my happiness.

Amie




Very good Amie!  A good way to deal with these situations even though it does hurt some it is best to get past it as quickly as you can and move on.

Bonnie
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CarolineTyler
Sep 06 2011 02:07 AM
I like your take on this, too often I have let a random comment from someone I don't and never will know bring me down.
Hugs
Caroline xx
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