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When You Transition . . . Everyone You Know Transitions, Too

When You Transition . . . Everyone You Know Transitions, Too Written By Corinne Goodwin in "The GAYJOURNAL Magazine" I began my so-called "path to transition" at the age of 55.  That is when I finally said the words "I am transgender and I have to live authentically" out loud.  Of course, I knew that I was trans decades earlier.  I was not able to put a name to it, but I knew there was something different about me even before I started kindergarten.  I was a real hard charger who worke

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

What is Important in a Relationship

What is Important in a Relationship What I have noticed is that many people create their own loneliness either by not being mindful of what they are looking for in a partner or what they can offer to a partner. Many people think that love just "happens," to them ("you'll know you're in love when it happens to you," as my dear Mother used to say, may God rest her soul). Here's an example, based on my own life, and I recommend people to make such a list so they can be more aware of

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Two Cities and a Huge Warehouse at Night . . .

Dear Friends, On the train ride from Poughkeepsie, NY to Seattle, WA, during the night, I encountered two beautiful cities at night (Cleveland, OH and Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN.  In between these two cities, we passed Milwaukee WI where I encountered many huge warehouses (3 - 4 city blocks on each edge) the largest of which was an Amazon Distribution Center.  Also passed a huge Miller High Life beer plant there, too. Met wonderful people on the train, including a best selling Western au

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Two Beautiful, Supportive Letters in Lesbian Connection . . .

Friends, Found two very supportive letters in the May/June 2015 issue of Lesbian Connection, and I will keep the authors anonymous. Slowly but surely, transwomen who identify as Lesbians are making progress . . . "My heart was crushed when I read in Lesbian Connection (LC): 'Currently, persons with Y chromosomes and intact male genitals want to attend, and in misogynist, anti-feminist ways they are attacking the (Michigan Womyn's) Festival . . . ' A misogynist is, by definition, 'a pe

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Tuesday In Seattle

Today it poured all day, not just drizzled.  Wanted to make the most of my trip and I did not want to stay in my hotel room.  Had a choice of visiting the physical Blick Art Materials Store in Seattle or the Seattle Public Library Central Library, but not both.  Checked the websites of both, and I chose the library hands-down! Am a library enthusiast, and I fell in love with the library from the moment I saw it from the bus.  The architecture was just amazing and the library was just huge,

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The New Loneliness: Confusing Internet Connections With Face to Face Friendships

Today people are confusing becoming "friends" with people they "meet" on the Internet with the friends they meet in real life. Ideally, people would physically meet and become friends with people, then use the Internet to maintain contact between meetings, or to grow these friendships if they're long distance friendships.  Rarely I have experienced friendships I met on the Internet to progress to face-to-face friendships, or that they have lasted, usually "petering out."  However, the friends I

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The Importance of Community

As a cisgender Lesbian, the price for immediate interaction, as provided by the Internet, rather than meeting face to face, is a loss of community. It is important to maintain community.  In the age of the Internet (especially social media), cell/smart phones, and other technology, it is becoming more and more difficult. In the Lesbian community, as I am seeing Lesbians approaching gaining their full civil rights, I am seeing less community. Presently, I only see Lesbian Connection and Golden Th

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The Headlines Are As Stunning As They Are Frequent . . .

The Headlines Are As Stunning As They Are Frequent An article by Corrine Goodwin for "The GayJournal Magazine" "Trump's transgender military ban 'worse than don't ask, don't tell,' advocates say." U.S. rolls back protections for transgender prison inmates Trump administration dismantles LGBT-friendly policies Health care new front for transgender rights under Trump In fact, the only thing that seems to happen more frequently than these headlines are the tweets emana

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The Differences Between Tomboys, Butch Lesbians And Transmen

Especially early in life, it is difficult to tell tomboys, butch Lesbians and transmen apart. This demands that parents and other caring individuals develop strong observational skills and to learn all they can about parenting. Parents and other caring adults, such as aunts, uncles, great aunts and uncles, grandparents, teachers, and coaches help the child build a foundation that will serve the child for the rest of his or her life. The tomboy cycles rapidly between male and female energies

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The Body Map

Please allow me to explain what a body map is. Many are familiar with the concept of an amputee having the feeling of where the toes or fingers of their missing limb are, and feeling as if the missing limb is present. When some FTMs stand before the mirror and as they relax, they can see the outline of their male body, such as how tall they are, the thickness of their arms and legs, how broad their chest is, the features of their face and the shape of their privates. They can also tell how

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

The "New" Friendship

Some people feel there is a new definition of friendship:  persons can be friends even if they never met face-to-face or even spoke on the telephone, such as Internet "friendships." They argue the old definition of friendship, such as knowing each other's personal information (first and last names, home addresses and telephone numbers) and regularly entertaining each other in each other's homes), no longer holds true in today's day and age. In my opinion, I think some people are confus

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Should You Move?

Recently I commented on someone's post about being bullied, and, literally, I was bullied in the public library by two teenage girls only 15 minutes later! That evening, I called a T/LGB Warmline to discuss this idea further. First of all, I believe, due to the current Administration, that T/LGBs will encounter an increase in bullying, no matter where they live. The first thing is that you deserve to be welcome, not just tolerated.  Be sure your overall situation improves with eac

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Seattle Fact Finding Trip

Dear Friends, Am going on a fact finding (but still fun!) trip to Seattle to see if I should continue on the 2 - 3 year wait list I have been on to get into Seattle Public Housing.   Hope to upload useful information every day, including pictures.   Presently the public housing I am in (Dutchess County, New York State - although it has shown improvement recently, it is still very trans and homo phobic), and the housing itself is going very quickly downhill.  Of course, it is unrea

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Rocky Garden (My First Poem in Decades)

Rocky Garden First saw a 12 year old girl Working on her large garden by herself Six to eight hours a day Moving heavy rocks to build up her garden Mother shouts to her father to come, please help her He works beside her for a few hours That summer was a drought Her garden burns in the heat   Next year, at age 13 She builds up her garden further Having bags of topsoil and gravel delivered Enlarging her already large garden Separating her vegetables by a wall of stone Proudly sharing her vegetabl

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Open And Closed Rejection

Everyone, and I mean everyone, no one is immune, experiences both open (obvious) and closed (not so obvious) rejection in their lives, through all stages of their life, starting in the very earliest years. The reality is not everybody likes and/or loves you, but there will be some who do. The secret is to focus on those who do, and inoculate yourself from those who don't, thus removing their power to hurt you. Examples of open rejection are: Owner of a small restaurant saying they are c

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

On Turning Sixty . . .

Looking back, I accepted my birthdays quite happily and proudly except for the last year before the decade turned and the first year of the new decade. For instance, I grieved turning 19, as I knew this was the last year I could call myself a teenager, and grieved a little more at 20, as I knew I was not only no longer a teenager, but never will be again. This happened at ages 29 and 30, as I knew I was leaving "young adulthood" behind. Again, at ages 39 and 40, I knew I was defin

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Nine Relationship Stages That All Couples Go Through

The following is an article that a friend sent me, with which I really resonate with. "Wondering what relationship stage you're in right now?  Here are the nine relationship stages that all couples go through, not how love starts." "Relationships are unique.  No one experiences love in the same way." "You may have been in several relationships in your life, and every relationship is unique.  But there are a few traits that are in common with every relationship." "Relationships, just like life, h

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

New Online Transgender Clinic and An Inspirational Video . . .

Dear Friends, First, I learned of a new transgender clinic that specializes in telehealth. Presently, they do not work with any insurance companies, but they are working hard to change that. Do understand they do have a sliding fee scale. Their website is: https://www.transclinique.com Secondly, a local transwoman, who I have known for years shares her amazing life story, showing that real change is possible. She overcame undiagnosed ADHD, abuse at the hands of her parents and tea

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Need A Roommate (Female) For Fantasia Fair . . .

Dear Friends, Have a double King Size bedded room at The Boat Slip Resort while I attend the Fantasia Fair from Sunday, October 17th to Sunday, October 24th. Seeking a platonic female roommate. To learn more about Fantasia Fair and The Boat Slip Resort, check it out by Googling "Fantasia Fair." Please drop me a PM to learn more. Thank you for considering me as your roommate. Yours truly, Monica            

My Take on the Book, The Sky Turned Green & The Grass Turned Blue: Diane's Story by Diane Kelly

Realize that Ellen already wrote a book review on the book, The Sky Turned Green & The Grass Turned Blue:  Diane's Story by Diana Kelly, about her personal journey as the significant other to a M2F transsexual. Feel very strongly that not only significant others, but also transgender people themselves and therapists should read this book. The most important lesson I took away from this book was that serious personality disorders can afflict transgender people, as they can anyone el

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

My Response To A Young Gaymale . . .

Friends, Was deeply moved when, while surfing the 'net, I came across a blog from a young Gaymale who wanted to no longer be a Gaymale. We ALL want to, on occasion, to "quit ourselves." NO ONE IS EXEMPT. It is OK to "shut it down," for a limited period of time, "give it a rest," to let our minds clear, to reassess WHAT KIND OF PERSON we want to be. Would have liked to beg him NOT to run away from himself, as that invites guilt and shame into one's life. Even though this blog addr

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

My First Weekend In Seattle . . .

After sleeping in at the hotel's pillow soft bed, trying to recover from three days riding coach on AMTRAK, I visited "Gay City," Seattle's LGBT Center.  Intended to visit for two hours, from 1 PM to 3 PM, the Asexual Support Group, which I found very informative.  After the Asexual Support Group, I wanted to visit for two hours, from 3 PM to 5 PM, the Lesbian Social Group, but I had to cancel as my back was acting up on the folding chair I was sitting on.  Following the Asexual Support Group, w

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

My First Monday In Seattle . . . Looking At Public Housing

Early Monday morning I looked at my first choice in public housing.  Wrote off my second choice because it was three miles from the nearest bus stop and it was a run down house that catered to hippies, on the top of a very steep hill.  The third choice was also three miles from the nearest bus stop and far into the boondocks, not near anything. Thanks to my friend, Emma, she researched my three choices before I arrived, saving me long bus trips on my second and third choices, and affirming

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

My First Day In Seattle!

Although I was exhausted, I took advantage of the King Street Railroad Station only being a block away from the offices of Sound Transit to pick up an ORCA card, which is $8.00 per day ($4.00 per day if you are a senior (65 or older), or disabled, which I highly recommend.  The ORCA card is good for the bus, ferry, streetcar, light rail, and heavy rail.  Bought eight days, and it is loaded onto one card, and I can not recommend it enough.  Much better than paying cash, and you save a lot of mone

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

Making The Most of Internet Dating

The two most popular "free" dating websites are OkCupid ("OkC") and Plenty of Fish ("PoF"), with feedback from people preferring PoF over OkC because PoF has a higher number of members.  Remember, you are PAYING for the so-called "free" websites by giving them your private information (check their terms of usage) and they accept advertising that usually shows up on sidebars and above and below their content.   Be aware that when you "delete" your profile, often it is not removed.  Be prepared to

MonicaPz

MonicaPz

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