As some of you might know, I had my sixteen year old sister down at my place for about a week. The reason I did this was simple. She needed out.
I look at my little sister and see a perfect replica of me at her age. Shy, outcasted, punk, stylish, misunderstood, and above all...depressed. She'd decided that eating is not something she HAS to do, and has resorted to eating about once a day, or even less on occasion. She hides in her room, away from the world. Not that I can blame her....my mother
Hey, Ladies and Gents and Uniques. It's me again. As I sit here on memorial day, sipping a Mikes Hard Lemonaid, I decided a good random blog was overdue. First off, thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday. It was much appreciated to read them . On the note of my trip to the ocean, it....didnt exactly go as planned. At all. We got up at a decent time, stopped at the local gas station and gathered ourselves some drinks for the three hour ride. Everything started out so smoothly! You
So, after three weeks of healing, I went back for another session of what I thought would be torture. It turned out to be torture/torment/agony x10. Oh my lard I hurt soooooo soo bad, I went into shock twice and almost passed out a few times. It was probably the worst pain I'd ever felt, surpassing my several bones I've broken and even when I sliced open my palm on a hubcap. The guy (Tim) gave me two options. 1)suck it up, grin and bare it and let him finish it 100% and he'll try to be quick and
Today I did the unthinkable. I did something I desperatly have been avoiding for sooooo long.
I put on a bra.
My "binders" smelled like old deodorant, were gross with sweat from work, and I had no time to hand wash and dry them by the time I needed to go to work. So I had to resort to digging through my clothes and finding that dreaded contraption. Instantly I hated it. The straps felt like they were digging into my shoulders, the very hug of it felt forgien and misguided. The whole way to wor
Okay so I wanted to throw up a really quick blog entry for my friend Amy, who has recently decided to start up her Youtube channel with an introduction video If you guys/girls would like to check it out, please feel free to give her a thumbs up and some support (my brain is so fried from no sleep i wrote thamb up and some supper lol guess im hungry XD) Sending some love your way, Amy!! Warren
I apologize, first of all, for not being here very much the past few days.
I very much appreciate all the kind messages from you guys in concerns to my wellbeing, but please do not be insulted that I did not reply to your messages.
It's been sort of a habit of mine of late...
Online-friends will message my kik or skype, and I read them...Please know that I DO read them.
But...I cant get myself to reply. I have no words in mind, no fake smiles to share, or motives for my disappearance.
In
"Neverland is home to lost boys like me, And lost boys like me are free" "Peter Pan, Tinkerbell, Wendy Darling, even Captain Hook--You are my perfect story book. Neverland, I love you so. You are now my home sweet home. Forever a Lost Boy, at last." Lost Boy by Ruth B Jeez, can this week drag on any longer? I keep checking my messages and the mail for a response from the insurance company, but no luck. I'm seriously one of the most impatient people on the planet earth. Justin's finger's all
I'm honestly not sure why I'm even blogging. I hardly see a point in whining about my ___ anymore. It doesnt really get me anywhere and I just end up looking like a whiner. I've fought with insurance. I've tried jumping through loopholes and even my doctor stood up to try and talk to them. But the answer is no, no matter what I try. My gender says Male on it, so my surgery is no longer a breast reduction. It's transgender surgery. But no, you have to use a code for gynocomastia for my claims bec
I'm bored out of my mind (on vacation from work because of spring vacation) so I've taken to Sims 4, exercise, writing and being lazy.
But while I sit here, something has come to mind. Sexuality.
Someone mentioned it to me and asked what my sexuality is, and I said I "think" I'm bisexual.
Well for someone like me who hasnt been fully educated on what certain sexualities are, I cant help but wonder if I'm not fitting that catagory.
I mean, men? Hell yes. Girls? Totally. But I really dont have
Work today started off as usual. I got there, I got rid of my backpack and such, got changed into my chef's gear, and got to work. Everything was normal. Well, as normal as it could be, anyway.
That is...until after lunch.
I headed to my locker to get my headphones for my ipod, but something fell out of my locker.
A little piece of paper, folded up, crinkled, and written on.
"Gender Queers Dont belong here, f*** off"
It took me a good five minutes to read this fully, and for it to punch me
So, for various reasons, I've decided to take a semi-perminate break from blogging. I just have nothing positive going on in my life right now and I dont want every single blog post I put up to be negativity and venting. I'm just.....tired. Nothing I say is right anymore, and somehow I always seem to anger someone. Last night I was basically yelled at for my blog post being insensitive and rude and it severely made someone mad at me, and later it was brought to my attention that I swear way too
Well, this is my second blog on here.
It's been a long while since I were on here, mostly due to password issues. XD
ANYWAY: the trip up to see my family went much better than I had expected, to be honest. My family had always been the judgemental type. You know the kind....all cops are pigs, governments out to get us, gays are weird, etc etc etc. So NATURALLY I were petrified to talk to my mother about my transgender issues. Of course I had already informed my older sister of what was going o
Have you ever had to do something, but had to wait to do it? And in that time of waiting, it seems like time ticks by fast when you need it to slow down, and not fast enough when you want it gone?
I suppose everyone has.
But tuesday is really dragging on my mind.
I mean, yeah, I need to see a therapist. I know I do, and I cant deny that.
But in the same sense....I dont want to. I dread it. I dont want to open up. I dont want to sit down and talk to someone about my broken, ignored childhood.
So, I got the response for my surgery.....After getting my letters in order and lining things up and rushing to get it finished for them before my insurance cuts out ((The government is apparently changing branches and cutting off my insurance before referring me to a new one)), I sent out my request for help with my surgery. Just a reduction, not a removal, and it came with nearly two pages of symptoms and sufferings in detail and with dates. Including: Neck pain, back pain, shoulder pain, head
I have a mental dilemma that has been plaguing my mind a little bit. Okay, a lot. It's sort of frustrating. It may be wrong of me and it may be slightly weird, but first of all, I'm Pansexual. No surprise there, I know. But if I can have a favorite 'type' of relationship, it would be guyXguy relationships. It's so cute! Something about it just really comforts me and its something I've always wanted, being that I'm, you know, Transmale. Some people associate me being Transgender with simply my wa
Anyone newly transitioning will nod a big "YUP" to me about this issue, and maybe some of you trans-vets out there too.
Public Bathrooms. The lou. The resty. The bowl of salvation, the think tank, the throne.
Call it what you will, but the issues remain the same.
Where the hell do we go?
I'm FTM. I DREAD the bathrooms. I will literally try to be as stealthy as humanly possible to sneak in the door, find a stall, and wait there until people leave before I rush out and wash my hands then run
I want my surgery.
There is no other way to word it or describe it.
I. want. it.
I'm tired of waiting, and I'm tired of putting 20$ in my savings box every week or so. It's just not cutting it, and I dont feel like I'm getting anywhere at all.
So, I've decided to try something I have never ever done.
Online Sales.
I'm going to make an ebay account and attempt to sell things online to go towards my surgery box!
So, I tried to evaluate my skills. Drawing is acceptable, but I dread the tho
I never thought of paperwork as a trigger. For anything really. Depression, anxiety, etc.
But I came to realize it today.
I woke up extra early and left to run some errands, knowing I had to build up some courage.
I paid my bill (some of it at least) to the hospital, and stopped by the local pharmacy for a few things for my costume on friday, then I made one more stop. The councilling building, where I'll be going.
After pulling into the driveway that I nearly passed by because I were nervou
I'm not really sure if this is allowed or if I will be in trouble for this later, but I wanted to try. I havent many others to talk to right now, and I'm about to do a bit in my/our journal as well to let him know that this is being done. I know this may seem very strange to some of you, or all of you, but I feel as if I will go insane if I do not make my presence known to at least those within this site. Facebook is not a good place for me I believe. At least, most parts of Facebook. And I am n
Good afternoon/morning/evening/Saturday? TGG friends, Yes, It's me again. No I havent died and no, nothing super dramatic has happened. I've just taken a lot of time to sort myself out and try and get my head straight. You'll be glad to know that I have been 'clean' or 'sober' of self harm for several weeks, and I am so far really loving my job. So far, I have not had a single day of dreading a workday aside from merely just being exhausted, getting used to 3rd shift. But it's getting easier. Sp
I never thought I would be here...at this impass of live. That moment when the fairy tales seem to take life and not in their usual good manner. The moment when a step-parent becomes the wicked witch or that menacing warlock. I never thought I'd be a part of it... Joey is his name. On first impression, I knew I didnt like him. His eyes told of selfishness and laziness. His posture spoke of sexism and over-tried alpha tendancies. His breath rank of an unrecognizable stench that turned my stomac
So, I need a little advice. But first I want to apologize if I annoy you guys or have fallen away from my "help others" phase and just been stuck in my "fml" stage. I dont mean to Anyway, this is about my boyfriends mother. We live with her and her family, none of which really support me or go along with my name change or anything because its my way of "attention seeking" apparently. But her constantly calling me Kristy and lately, lady, miss, girl, chick, all of which you can tell she is doing
I went to see my doctor again today, simply for a check in or a check up on my medications and what not.
Normally I'm very nervous about seeing the doctor. I had a lot of health issues I were dealing with and always worried about 'getting in trouble' with my doctor. Granted, I love her to pieces, and she cares more than any other doctor I have EVER had. But in the same aspect, shes not afraid to tell me how it is, and boot me in the butt for not taking care of myself.
When I finally told her a
Sometimes I cant help but wonder why I bother trying. Why I push so hard to make things right... Today's my birthday, yes that much is true. And it werent a 'bad' day, and my bfs family and whatnot did what they could to make it nice for me. But I'll admit, it was a little hurtful not to see "Warren" or "Ren" on my birthday card. Due to butting heads about it, they left it blank...Instead of a birthday cake, they did a various sliced cheesecake...most likely to avoid the name situation again. Wh
I'm so excited I can barely think!
Oh my good lawd of doritoz, I've done it!
My name has LEGALLY and FULLY been changed to Warren Renexius Ornan G__!!!
Kristy Susan is a thing of the past, I have been approved for my name change, and my new photo I.D. is in the mail!!
The judge was unbelievably awesome about it! I expected 150 Questions and tried to think of the best answers, but as soon as I walked into her office, she simply smiled.
"Now that I see that you're serious about your transgend
