Hi there Blessed be to all. As I start off thinking about myself, I know if I could change anything about myself, it would be: My gender by protecting myself from having to experience gender specific issues the world have, Keep my height and weight Be fit and limber, a perfectionist when it comes to kungfu, tai chi, tae kwan do, and numerous other martial arts formforms Speak language I stil understand and more, German, Dutch, Italian, French, Spanish, Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, Taiwanese,
Hi all Reason I say there I go again, I had to play car fixer again for my sister. Do you girls and guys realize that a car is heavy to push on your own. But this time round, I reversed the car into the garage, because there is no way in hell that I am pushing that heavy () car again to have to start. I hope that my sister doesn't stuck tomorrow with the car as she goes to work. I don't know where it is draining the battery from and I didn't have enough time to trace the fault as I was wo
Hi there everybody Can't say that it's been a long time, but I've been busy and attempting to get this done for a while now. So I recently got my medical aid bill, and low and behold i underwent radiology for the week I was in hospital without me knowing. I know precisely which drip it was in after thought, but still I like my doctors to be open to me because that is what I do. If I wasn't open, I would've let them put me with the guys, and never have told the medical staff I was transgend
Hi there I'm smiling at the thought of me saying, let there be... First thing that comes to mind is ,"Light". But which light will I be referring too? Light as in truth, or the perfect way forward. But the more I think about it, the answer slips me... What I've come to find is, my week was filled with conversation with either men I personally know or have just met on Facebook. Yes, I sometimes accept request from total strangers. In the hope that not all men are dogs or think a pair of tits ma
Hi everyone Let me say this. Ouch is literally currently happening to me. I got this sharp pain yesterday in my abdominal region and this morning it extended it's range to my crotch area. So ouch stand for pain and bleeding, that I think I can handle till later, but will definitely go to the doc tomorrow. Okay, I'm also guessing that I'm postponing getting medical attention so I can possibly get the results I desire. What I can say is, don't do what I do, because it can result in a dange
Hi there everyone Its not about being optimistic or pessimistic, it about the way my smile and looks are putting me in hot water at times. I've come to realize that some of my male friends are now also hitting on me, because I've got a perky happy face 90% of the time if not more. Now they are becoming like horny dogs after my ass too. Is this a culmination of my smile, facial expression, ass and boobs or just men being like a pack of horny dogs in heat season??? With the unknown factor,
Hi everyone Apparently I'm loving these to do or not to do's. But let's just say, they come after experiences I've gone through. This week that passed was no different from others. Seeing that for my last few weeks at work I've been going to the shooting range, with the only difference that I actually got to shoot. So 1 less day of actually working for me, because I'd normally return to work after a long drive. Friday, as per usual. I got up earlier to be at work before 06:00 and get w
Hi all I know, it's all part of the transition. But does laser hair removal have to sting this much??? Okay, so I did it a few minutes ago. Stung a bit, but I've found better results if you don't shave beforehand. It's also not like I have hair popping out like daisies on my face and neck. It is still like a little blotch I've here and there. I last shaved on Friday, because of a round trip from Cape Town to Upington (over a1000miles) and back. Didn't think we wouldn't not sleep for a
Hi all The question always comes up, never mind if you thought you've got control over ever part of your life, there is always something out of sink... I guess it's natures or life's way of saying that you have a lot to learn girl, just deal with it or parish in your self loathing pity party. The first one I would like to address is... Why did I have to be trans and not cis??? Well, I don't know the answer to that, but it's what my heart, head and well every single part of my body dictate
Hi all Well, yesterday I had an appointment with my GP. Got there for a routine checkup and mentioned that my right boob is tender too, checked for lumps can't feel anything, but she is now recommending because my boobs are so dense I should go to have them checked out with sonograms. But yeah they always start about 10 days before my cramps start and that just seems normal to me. After that she said, welcome to women problems, boobs feeling sore that time of the month and all the bloatedne
Hi all. Not that many days have past since I gave my last update. Being doing the fitness boot camp as I said, and on Thursday got certificates for attendance. Wasn't weird that completed it, but then I got the best improved on burpees, lol that was hilarious. Sat there and thought it was over and here I get called up for another thing. Well, I had on this confused face and all. Got up and went in because I somehow without knowing it became a couch as well. And my surprise is
Hi all, haven't been around for a while and yes. I still hope that everyone is doing well. One of the most recent things that happened was a dreadful birthday, where I was feeling depressed and violated to the extend that I stayed indoors as I got home the day before and didn't leave my bed except for bathroom breaks and eating obviously, (from the Thursday evening till the Monday around noon. Didn't even answer any calls, just played games on my tablet and basically slept the whole time.
I know the title will sound like I'm rethinking something, and seeing that this is a Transgender blog, I might be thinking that I am doing the wrong thing. But no, don't be hassling me to change for you please. I am perfectly Michele as I am, just need a few minor modifications, make that minor modifications in the form of surgeries. I'm currently the fleet manager as I said in a previous blog. This 8-4 thing is killing me as I'm use to the 6-6 thing and after 2 days and 2 nights I would no
I never thought of it like this... Okay, we all probably never thought of it, okay make that the persons who never gave the world a chance to influence and change your gender. I've always been trapped in a body with a body part belonging to someone else. And even as a child I would ask everyone, "WHERE DO YOU SEE A BOY, BECAUSE IF YOU TALKING TO ME, I'M NOT LISTENING AS I AM NOT A BOY!!!" So did I give my parents the chance to grieve the loss of a son they never had, or is my mother just t
Okay, on day one I was exhausted and still went to the gym. This week I managed to go to the gym 3 days with my friend. One I couldn't go because I had to attend to a work function. What I noticed on Wednesday was. Meeting day is a crappy day to be at the station. I should thank the heavens that I wasn't put in charge of typing the minutes as well. I hate doing minutes. I had to sit in some meeting that was super boring. And another where I call it a crap out parade. Shame this one C
Last night I was informed that the one I'm dating is going away for a month or more. I'm not the dependent type of person, but it's giving me the sensation of sadness and that my boo is way too far to touch. And me vocalizing this feeling made him stress about it too. What I know for certain is, his family decided on him to go help out at family and the ones that decided aren't aware of our relationship or at least not aware of how I look. Make that his whole mom's side of the family, as I'
Hi there all. I have mentioned that I was applying to an internal post at work, and that it implies that I will by an acting fleet manager. On the 30 September 2015 I was officially informed that my application for the post was successful. The amazing part was, that all my competition were butch guys and little feminine old me won the race, and I didn't come second, third or any other number other then number 1. I started on 7 October 2015 at 07:30 and my first day was a blast. I enjoyed
Seeing that I have the time on my hands let make this one clear. For 5 days out of the month, I am on a lower dosage of estrogen, and it kinda makes me cranky as hell. Reason being is that I have decided to go the medically induced period cycle, and I know it is motha of all hell pain cramps, because I've always had these cramps from my 9th birthday. Some months it's good and I'm just cranky as hell. Other months it is so bad, I cramp and start crying from the pain. But I know it is now in
Hi there all I know I haven't been on in the resent weeks and I am to blame. Well you'll see what is to blame as I continue this entry.... So, I have been chatting to this guy and thought that he is cool and everything. Till the awkward part came of him asking me to meet him. We continued our cheerful banter and I didn't let that phase me. As luck would have it, I was busy chatting to a girlfriend about my gender and she being understanding and him at the same time. Yes, I did the bloo
What happened at a course. Yes, I sometimes do sound like my 2nd language is my 1st, and my mother tongue like I'm a fumbling fool, which is Afrikaans.
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Everyone will ask why you asking about chocolates, right. Actually wrong. I've never been bound by race or religion, when it came and still comes to men intriguing me. But I've always had a thing for someone taller and bigger body structured then my 1.74m (5ft8) structure and around 140Lbs. The top criterion above all else, is he needs to have respect, love and adoration for me. Okay, I grew up in a time when interracial relationships were a no no, but I am grateful my dad crossed all bou
Made a date to massage a friend. Well that was easy as I owed him, and all the latest people I have met, I haven't as yet disclosed to that I'm trans and pre op. His options were as I gave were: Deep muscle massage; Normal massage; or Uhm massage. Without him knowing the uhm is a kinky massage, he chose it as a super deep muscle massage where he would moan, and were we moaning. Got to his place. He is a little bit shorter then me, and I like him. Got my hug, and my usual spot was taken
Got asked about documentation my mom couldn't find, so I handed her what I stored away in the safe. After finding the documents, I reiterated that it might be difficult to do what she wants as my gender marker and first name are being changed slightly. And all I got was, it's your life and your problem when I'm dead. I've always known my support came from my father, so with the lack of support from the one we call Hammie (what my siblings and I call our mother). But I also know, that out of
Why tears. Well I've always been an emotionally strong woman. Yes, strong as in vocalizing what I think and how I do thigs, as well as not needing a Knight to save me I can save him too... I'm a fighter after all. Well in the last month I've been disciplined for not informing my commander about a lone child on street late at night! I asked if that wasn't part and parcel of my work to serve and protect, and if so. Give me a written instruction stating I should leave a defenseless five year
