I was born a woman in a mans body. I've known this since my earliest memory but growing up during the 70s and 80s in Southern California and being raised by two very conservative parents made life heartbreaking and filled with pain.
I wasn't strong enough to go against my parents and now at the young age of 50 it's still difficult.
I think about how different my life will become and it excites me to think that one day I'll be able to transform into the woman I've always hidden from the public. It's going to take a lot of work—surgical and hormonal— but the end result for me will be liberating and glorious.
When I was younger I would wear my sisters dresses as often as I could. One day in my sophomore year of high school my mother caught me in a dress. I spent the next two years in counseling being told it was unacceptable to feel the way I did. In 1986 when I graduated from high school I was forced by my parents to enlist in the United States Army in order to make me a man. I retired after serving 25 years.
During my career I fought the urge to be who I was inside. I married three times but that never lasted. I was always jealous of my wives. I wanted to be a wife too.
I've begun the necessary steps to happiness. Will it be easy? Absolutely not but anything this important shouldn't be an easy process to traverse. I have several roadblocks ahead of me; weight loss, the looks I'll get when coming out in public for the first time (I'm 6'3" 250 lbs) but I even though I know tough times are ahead I'm still driven to become the woman I was born to be.
I quit my job and moved 1,400 miles to Seattle with the hopes of finding a job where I can transition and continue on with becoming Olivia.
This will be the first of many blogs depicting my journey.
I hope you'll join me by following in on this new grand adventure.
When the original series of Will and Grace entered my life on television back in the 90s I was still serving in the Army. It was a different time. If you knew someone who was gay you became an outcast and if you watched the show you became the target for bullies. Luckily I'm not a small framed person and I lived off post so nobody knew my secrets and I'm not one to be bullied by anyone.
One thing that show taught me was that no matter who you are it's always acceptable to be your true self as long as you don't purposely hurt others.
The return of this hit comedy airs tonight on NBC and I can't wait to see Will, Grace, Jack and Karen reunite for serious discussions on sex, politics and every day life.
Enjoy the show GIRLS!!
Two of my girlfriends and I went out to go dancing and let our hair fly on Saturday night. It was great, we arrived to the club and were welcomed with open arms. Guys were buying us drinks and we danced our asses off.
When it was time to leave we had a 6 block hike in our 6 inch heels to the parking lot, but some young kids decided to harass us while walking to our safe zone.
One of my girlfriends, who will remain nameless, was assaulted one time by a man who continuously called her a freak while she was walking alone to her car after work a few years back.
Because of that terrible attack we walk in numbers — ALWAYS. When being harassed by these punks I took a photo of their license plate causing them to stop in the middle of the road threatening to run me over with the car.
Here's where the story elevates; as they made the threat two deputies were coming out of a diner and heard the words spewing from the mouths of these thugs. It only took them seconds to react and the trio were taken into custody.
The deputies said it didn't matter that we were CD/TG, we were people who needed help and that's what they do.
I love the Emerald City.
The moral of the story is simple: Walk in numbers and don't be afraid to ask for help.