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Update


LovelyLisa

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This past week was interesting. I just started an upped dosage of Spiro today. It seems to be agreeing well with me. No side affects and it seemed to calm me.

I went to a service on Saturday. On my way home, much like I usually do, I'll stop in Target, etc. to get food, wine, whatever. I was a bit overdressed but looked presentable and classy. Anyways I had someone say to me, "hey beautiful" and I, being a bit flustered said "Thank you". I am always polite, but I was a little mad at myself. If he had told me that I looked nice or beautiful, I would have been okay. But "hey beautiful" just seemed derogatory towards women. I've had guys say so many things to me before, I am surprised I was surprised. I think that my mind was in a different place due to the service. It was beautiful, but I felt bad after the service.

This week at work, I found out three people are leaving. One was fired after he gave his two weeks. So, I am picking up the pieces. I thought that my head would explode on Monday.

I have a touch up laser and electrolysis this Thursday. Nothing next week, but then a baseline blood test the week after that. Hopefully I can get on estrogen sooner than later. We'll see. It won't happen for at least another 4 weeks though. But I've been waiting for 38 years to live as myself. What's a couple more months or years.

Oh and there is one more thing. Anxiety is creeping back. My ability to cope was gone after all of the repression was stripped away. I though that may be that was in my past but I will need something.

Hopefully, everyone's week is going well so far. Tomorrow is humpday!!

Love, Lisa

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Hi Lisa,

Of course I wasn't there to hear his tone and delivery, but my first thought on reading that he said "Hey beautiful!" was that I was very pleased for you! I can also well imagine being very flustered and caught unprepared.

Now, I don't go saying that phrase myself to pretty women. More and more I might say that they look pretty or nice, but I have trouble even saying that as I fear they will worry that I'm coming on to them or something.

Anxiety is natural, especially now. My suggestion is to allow yourself to fully feel the anxiety. Don't try to suppress or fight it. Feel it, take a look at it, and give yourself permission to have it. It's a very human emotion that anyone would feel at a time like this.

Have a great humpday tomorrow!

Emma

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Lisa,

Similar to Emma my first thought about "Hey beautiful" was very positive - but being earlier in the journey I'm just thrilled to be referenced as a female almost anytime, I do see your point about the problem with it and I look forward to being "enough of a woman" to react the same way :-)

And certainly there's lots to be anxious about, I'd also suggest writing it down, whether it's here or just for yourself. I carry a little notebook with me everywhere I go just to write down any strong feelings I encounter through the day.

xoxo

Christie

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