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Why so much conflict in LGBTIA


Briannah

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So the more I read, the more I see a LOT of splintering and unkindness between the different groups under the big group umbrella.  It makes me sad.  All the groups under this umbrella are small population wise, logic dictates to me that banding together would be the way to go.  Rights for everyone, equality for everyone!  But instead there seems to be conflict everywhere.  Large groups of gay and lesbian hating each other, large groups of both of them hating trans people, a lot of transgender people looking down on crossdressers who are only cd, the asexuals feel like everyone hates them, everyone wanting to erase the bisexuals and force them into a choice, and other conflicts I don't even know about.  

I think it really surprises me in particular with this umbrella because they all share the common theme of we deserve acceptance and normalcy.  With that mindset, why on earth would people deny others the same thing?  I know it happens.  I see it in my reading, I've seen it in the male-female social power dynamic.  There are a lot of feminists who do cross the line into Feminazi territory, who can't tell the difference between wanting to be equal and wanting to replace men as the group in power. 

Why doesn't the struggle to make the world a place that just accepts people unite us?  If it can't, does that mean something?  Does it mean our species in it's development of intellect and social behaviors isn't ready to give up the division of groups and the need to feel our group is right other groups are wrong?  Are we just not developed enough in brain power to overcome that self-interest only on a mass scale?  How much do we as a species NEED the external validation of others? 

And if we can't even do this on a smaller scale of people with alternative to the binary 'norms' (Male-female, gay-strait, mono-poly, etc.) then how can we ever hope as a species to overcome the cultural, racial, and religious divides and learn to exist peacefully and gracefully together if we can't even handle people making personal choices in their lives?  How far could mankind GO if we stopped trying to kill each other, control each other, and really learned to make peace between all the nations?  But we can't even manage it inside our individual nations. 

Sometimes it feels to me like the ENTIRE PLANET just collectively decided to ignore the truth that we're all human beings on the same planet and should be working together.  And yes, I have fallen into that trap too.  Especially when feeling threatened.  It's an easy trap. 

I wonder if Rodney King knew how really profound his "why can't we just get along" really was.

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Bree,

As you so often do, you bring up very interesting points to discuss. Where to begin?

1. To me it's odd that transgender is even included in LGBT... "They" are about sexuality and we are about gender. I think we ride on their coat tails because our voice is so small. But maybe over time ours will emerge without them. For now I'm happy to be included somewhere!

2. Indeed, some gay people look down on transgender people. But those who are 100% gay or lesbian sometimes look down on the bisexual people too. It reminds me of the 60's Black Panthers looking down on the folks following MLK. After all, didn't they have a common cause? Maybe from my perspective but I suppose I am naive. Heck, I've also personally experienced being dissed by transsexual people for not being trans enough. I was hurt at the time but nowadays when I think about it I chuckle. 

3. Entire planet is screwed up. Yes. Ask Sunnis and Shia. Ask Indians caught up in their caste system. Or the aborigines in Australia. Or here, those over 50 (or 40) vs. those younger. 

Im also reminded of the Kink's song "Lola": it's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world, except for Lola! 

Hmmm, maybe I should change my name. 

Emma

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Is it really different?  The detail may be different, and they are further ahead(the right to marriage battle finally won, more general acceptance I believe), but a lot of my gay and lesbian friends say they feel incredible pressure to be 'normal', face discrimination every day, and they are also facing ugly legislation about stupid things, in the form of those religious protection acts popping up and things like Michigan trying to make oral and anal sex acts between consenting adults illegal (which is so crazy, most hetero couples I know including me would SO be in jail!).  While the detail is different, it seems to me that the social experience and pressures are very similar.  A lot of people go out of their way to treat both groups poorly, despite both life situations being something the person is born with.  I'm not sold on the nature of the variance, sexuality vs. total gender roles, is that different.  People want to control others, make them invisible and behave according to their boxes. 

I would think the treat me normally and respect my right to exist mindset pretty much all of the lgbtia have as far as my experience with the various groups shows would unite everyone in the really big overumbrella.  Apparently I'm overly naive.  :)  

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