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Frank09

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Hi I’am new to site. My name is frank and I’am 23. On the outside Iam a male but inside I feel like a female.  When I was kid I always been attractive to girl stuff like painting my nails/toes, wearing makeup, wearing high heels and dresses. I felt pretty and happy when I look    myself in the mirror. As I grew up I felt ashamed of myself because I was a male who was more like a female and I didn’t know why and hoped those feelings would eventually leave so I can be “normal”. That never happened but couple years ago I did a lot of research and I realize it wasn’t my fault. I always denied my female self but Iam finally ready to  turne that page and admit that I’am ready to be a women. Just don’t know what to do now? I could use some advice.

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Oh! You already have a blog! Good for you. Please see my response to your intro post. You’re absolutely correct, by the way, that it’s not your fault, nor is it a choice, a proclivity, or a lifestyle, to be transgender. The science is becoming clear: we are born this way, simply examples of normal human diversity. Nothing to be ashamed of, but I know all too well that can be easier said than believed. I’m 61 and lived in shame for about the last 60 years. No more though!

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Every trans person I've ever known who tried to repress their inner identity has failed. There may be exceptions, but this goes way beyond a lifestyle choice. I can relate to your statement about you hoped the feelings would leave so you can be normal. I felt the same. I suspect most of us have felt this way.

My first bit of advice is to explore your identity to start figuring out where you may fit on the gender continuum. Are you happy to crossdress at home or do you feel a compelling need to transition to female? I'm going back a ways here but I first thought I must be a crossdresser, so that's what I tried. It was fun and liberating for awhile, but I became aware that I needed more. My search for happiness and equilibrium in life eventually resulted in complete transition which I have never regretted. 

Best of luck as you go forward on your journey. 

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Thank you for your advice ladies. No I haven’t seen a therapist let Iam still at the beginning of this process. I still have to come out to my family. 

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Hi Frank, do you feel a need to come out to your family soon or before you see a therapist? If so, may I ask why? Coming out can be pretty challenging and fraught with emotions, for you and them. I suggest that you wait until you feel you’re on your own firm and solid ground emotionally.

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