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Susane

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Everything posted by Susane

  1. I came out to my estranged wife last Saturday. She was incredibly supportive and and understanding. She said I should be proud of myself.

    1. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      Congrats, Susane. I'm glad sharing with your wife went well.

    2. tbirdgal

      tbirdgal

      How many times have I said being Trans is something to be proud of ?

  2. I'm coming out on Saturday. I can't sleep with the excitement. I can't wait. I'm sure there will be tears, mine and hers, and happiness I hope.

    1. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      Good Luck, Susane, but I'm sure you'll do fine.

    2. Lori

      Lori

      Best of luck to you Susane. :)

  3. Hi it's been a few weeks since I had the chance to sign in. I've had a lot of exciting things going on. I'm nearly full time now and I signed up to the transition support service. God I am so happy.

    1. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      Congrats, Susane...and nice to see you around again. =)

    2. Lori

      Lori

      Wonderful news. Glad to see you here. :)

    3. LynneaUrania

      LynneaUrania

      Living as you truly are in a truly beautiful country like yours is heavenly. Blessings

  4. I came out to my landlord today. He was totaly cool about it and told me his sonin New Jersey has a transgender FTM partner.

    1. Lori

      Lori

      Wow, that's great!

    2. MsBeth

      MsBeth

      Awesome Susane :)

  5. Susane

    Another call to Mom.

    I'm glad that you wont be going back to that well. Help given grudgingly is worse than no help at all.
  6. I telephoned the Gender Identity Clinic today. Now I just have to wait for my appointment! I am so excited!

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. minyteTX

      minyteTX

      Good luck Susane, I have my apt next month. I'm so looking forward to it.

    3. Susane

      Susane

      It will take a while to come through. But I will keep pestering them.

    4. tbirdgal

      tbirdgal

      Damn Susane , I BET YA ARE !!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. Hey Give it time for feed back Amber. We're all over the world and in different time zones. I find it interesting that you changed your eating habits. Same here, gave up beer and cigarettes as well, with no cravings or anything. Enjoy your heels when you get them. I love mine though I usually wear my flats when I'm walking, I'm a bit too tall for them to be practical but my flats are nice and go well with most of my skirts and jeans. I read your first blog. I reckon that although you say it was a sudden decision I wouldn't be surprised if you secretly knew, but were burying your true self way down deep inside. Welcome to the TG Guide sister, you will get a lot of support and advice. go on the forums and don't be shy to ask any questions. There is a lot of wisdom here. Xxx Susane.
  8. I'm starting to see results thanks Amanda.
  9. Just had chocolate brownie flavoured drinking chocolate. Perhaps there is a God after all!

    1. tbirdgal

      tbirdgal

      Good ole Yahoo choclate drink !

    2. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      Heh-heh-hehhhhhhh... good stuff =D

  10. After almost a lifetime of hating it I finally got the nerve to start removing my facial hair on a permanent basis. I have always wanted to get rid of my facial hair, but like many others, I guess, it always seemed like a bigger step than getting my legs, chest, etc waxed. After all that grows back after a while and if you discover that you are not as trans* as you thought then no permanent changes are apparent. Of course getting rid of a few hairs is not as big a deal as GRS but it is a visible change! Ever since puberty I have heard about electrolysis and been fascinated as to where you get it done and how do you even find someone who has had it done for advice (I have spent most of my life pre-internet). Also as a child I don't think my parents would have signed the consent form or stumped up the cash! Even as a young teenager I would shave my body hair, I come from the Planet of the Apes it seems, but I have never been able to get my face clean shaven. So roll forward a few decades and I find myself living in Edinburgh, Scotland. I now have the internet and after years of uncertainty as to why I have always been drawn to wearing what society calls 'women's clothes' I have now learned about words like transgender and dysphoria, so I realized that to have any level of inner happiness I would have to be true to myself and admit that I am a trans* woman. Whenever I say that I feel so happy, and also a little sad that I didn't come out years ago. Anyhow, I was fed up with shaving my legs and getting razor rash on my chest so I looked online and found a trans* friendly waxing salon not ten minutes drive from my apartment. I had had a couple of waxing's, when I asked Sam, the therapist, what the machine in the corner was for. She explained that it was a Intense Pulse Light machine, a kind of laser for removing hair. When I asked if it worked on facial hair I was expecting to be told that It only worked on genetic female hair, I was half expecting disbelief that I would want it done. Instead Sam just told me to go away and think about it for a few days. When I went for my first appointment I must admit I was having second thoughts, and very nearly didn't ring the doorbell. But I knew that if I didn't do it now I never would and would always regret it! I had to have a skin test the day before so I knew what to expect, but the real thing is painful. It is like touching your skin with a hot wire. Luckily the pain only lasts a second while the 'gun' is touching your skin, but I couldn't help jumping a little bit each time. It was the anticipation as much as anything. I am now waiting for the results to start to become visible. Apparently the hair will start to fall out after ten to twenty days, then when it starts to grow again I will get the next session. It takes about six in all, maybe a couple more if the hair is stubborn! What I am looking forward to most is not having a semi permanent red face from having to shave twice a day, and of course looking that little bit more feminine. (For younger readers when I was a teenager we called the police the Fuzz, I consider my facial hair to be a gender policeman, trying to keep me in my prison cell)
  11. I changed my profile picture. Kind of by mistake!

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      Wish some of my mistakes turned out so well...

    3. PlagueBubonic

      PlagueBubonic

      I know right !! XD When I goof-up disaster follows >.<

      However your pic is stunning!!

    4. Susane

      Susane

      Thanks Tristina.

  12. Just had my first IPL/laser treatment. Can't wait for the results to show. It takes a week or so apparently.

    1. Lori

      Lori

      Nice! Keep us updated on your progress. Wishing you best of luck with the results.

    2. PlagueBubonic
  13. I've just had the skin test for my laser treatment tomorrow. Hopefully no reaction.

  14. No good comes from playing the media game and once you start you can not easily stop. I assume that Thomas Beatie gets paid for his media appearances, but the damage they do, I have heard the usual prejudiced bar-room comments, is not worth the money.
  15. Went to my new meet-up group today.

  16. Feeling realy good today. The weather is nice and cold and sunny. Just how I like it. It's great to be alive.

  17. Just got back from my jaunt. Michael I had Bratwusrst

  18. I often dream that I don't have any gender. The other night I dreamed I was reading my birth certificate and it said Susane Timothy. And of course Michael, it is normal. When we dream we may be be getting a little bit of wish fulfilment, but we see our true selves stripped of the image that has been imposed by our concious brain!
  19. A few days ago I came home from work and as usual applied my make-up. Nothing unusual there, but as I was checking my lipstick I suddenly, how can I put this? I remembered myself. I had for a for a few minutes forgotten that I had another personality sharing this body. I was and had always been Susane (I will argue of course that I have always been Susane. I discovered my real name when I was five years old). It was as though the repetitive task of applying my make-up every day had hypnotised me and that I had never had another name, I was just another middle aged woman taking pride in her appearance. Of course once the thought occurred to me the feeling started to fade and my old life reasserted itself in my memory. Afterwards, however, I had a feeling of elation so powerful that it hasn't really faded completely a week later! I must just stress that I do not drink or take drugs and I am not on any medication or hormones! I think the elation came from the sheer joy that I had made a breakthrough in my transition, I had become unselfconscious. If you have learned to drive you know what it's like when you get to that moment where you stop thinking about which pedal to press to change gear and just do it, i think that's what has happened to me. All my life I have wanted Susan to take over the controls (to continue the driving analogy) and now I have. That's what the elation was, I have taken over, I am now always me and refer to my former name in the third person. For example the other day I went through his closet and threw out his clothes, leaving him just enough for work purposes and any occasion when he will absolutely need a suit. I wonder if this is a common experience? Has anyone been their true self for so long that the old, false self is nothing more than a memory? Susane Xxx.
  20. Going to gay Paris and then onto Bavaria for the weekend!

    1. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      When U get 2 Bavaria, have some bratwurst, broetchen and a good bier for me!! Better yet, if you can find a way...EMAIL THEM TO ME! LOL =)

  21. Susane

    happy Halloween

    Amazing to see so many tough guys out buying Wonder Woman costumes.
  22. Had a visit to the waxing salon today. We discussed IPL facial hair removal. I'm going to do it!

  23. And sometimes, Michael, the god of small victories is on OUR side. Just ask Lana!
  24. I had to spend the weekend in ATS clothes. I had serious withdrawal.

    1. UsernameOptional

      UsernameOptional

      No doubt that was a bummer. I literally have panic attacks if I know i"m going to have to wear ATSC. Glad it's rare.

    2. tbirdgal

      tbirdgal

      I feel fer ya dear ........

  25. So very happy at long last. I feel like a fool though, I could have been this happy years ago.

    1. Lori

      Lori

      I remember feeling the same way, but it's never too late to be true to yourself. :)

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