Femme vs male persona

20 posts in this topic

Posted

Hi everyone

I have always maintained that I am fundamentally the same person en femme as I am in male mode.

However when out dancing at a party this weekend I realised that I love dancing when in female mode, but it does NOTHING for me as a male.

Very strange.

I have blogged about it in more detail (https://daniellaargento.wordpress.com/ if you want to read the whole story), I wonder if anyone else has this experience and what you feel about it.

Daniella

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Posted

Hi Dani,

It seems obvious to me now but it was kind of an epiphany when I realized that indeed, I'm always one and the same, for better or worse. I have not been dancing while dressed but I imagine it would be delightful. Dancing as a male has never been appealing to me.

Emma

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Posted

Dear Daniella and Emma,

Perhaps you like dancing as a lady as a gentleman or butch usually leads, and the lady follows. When you are dancing as a man, you are expected to lead and that can be stressful for some people.

As for the gentleman's behavior on the dance floor, he was TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE. A gentleman or butch should not touch ANY part of a lady's body (this includes accessories) without her permission. To dance with a lady's purse, I have never heard of, but strikes me as a fetishist act.

Yours truly,

Monica

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Posted

For me I think dancing as a lady is about freedom of movement, flowing, graceful, my arms and hands allowed to move more expressively. One of my earliest memories was at a preschool birthday party where I twirled while I danced with my arms held above my head. I loved it until I somehow "just knew" that boys aren't supposed to dance like that. A painful realization at five years of age!

Anyway, I agree with you, Monica, that the man described in Daniella's blog was inappropriate, a boor. I imagine he was at least a bit tipsy but of course that is no excuse. His dancing with her friend's purse sounds to me like he was taunting and teasing, as if he was trying to hurt back after he had been rebuffed. Thankfully Daniella and her friends were able to get away from him without further harm.

Emma

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Posted

I have always enjoyed dancing so nothing different from my past life to my current life.

Did not read the blog post and sure Emma and Monica are on the right track.

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Posted

Well, for me , I have my remaining side , all Girl. Sure , I do some guy things even as a "Butch " woman. I don't give it too much thought now , nor do I care that my trans sisters think I'm betraying them over my "Male" dominated activities .

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Posted

Ellen,

I hear and have shared your concerns about what our trans sisters may think. I haven't heard anything negative here on TG Guide but I don't doubt that some may air their opinions. Well, the heck with them. Just like careers, hobbies, activities, and whatever else may be enjoyed and done by both men and women, the same thing is true for transmen and transwomen. Who the heck has the right to monitor or judge what I do or like to do? Answer: no one.

I wonder what "Male" dominated activities you are referring to. Maybe it's building your models, your photography? I certainly don't think of those activities as being anything more or less than Ellen's cool activities, and I really doubt you could tell me anything that I would judge any differently.

I just had to get that off of my chest.

Emma

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Posted

Thanks for your contributions everyone...

Still mulling this over.

It has confused me a little.

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Posted

I haven't read the blog yet, but what I can deduce from male dance compared to female dancing, there is same actions for both but speed G tone of mood for changes in different genders!

As male I am aggressive techno trance pop dancer irrelevant of sexual energy or release energy as dancer!

As female dancer being Arabic oriented we have a saying for fame of " belly dancers" become the sexual dance in public for moi! That turns me on when I danced a while back with group of friends they were all staring at me! Mind you i have yet to go to a night club as her lol! Topic out scope enough said.

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Posted

Emma, perhaps some day , you can come east and I can show ya around "Da lan dat Time forgot . For some unknown reason , there a "Core " bunch that basicly dictate to the entire community what is and what is not acceptable . Since I am such a renegade , I broke away and have caused a lot of concern as to my doing things my way

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Posted

Dear Ellen,

In the Lesbian community, there is a "core group," that dictate for the entire community what is and what is not acceptable.

Yours truly,

Monica

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Posted

Dear Ellen,

Some day I'd love to visit you and your environs! I'm sure we would have a lot of fun terrorizing the status quo... :)

Emma

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Posted

It may be strange but I never really enjoyed dancing as a male either. It wasnt till I went to my first tclub party that I danced with a gentleman and felt so swept away.

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Posted

It depends. Will answer later.

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Posted (edited)

Femme vs male persona Well in reply to author post, I have also danced & really enjoyed while in femme persona! A girl (wow) came up to me & said you dress very hot either way! I guess by that time she & others had noticed I was in male wearing girly clothes & security & DJ didn't like it. He wanted all attention deficit from everyone directed towards him. I was just glad for invitation to party as my week was going very monotone. In all I have had guys come up to me but never a girl while dressed in femme. You see as author said, "it didn't change either way". What is it that one is looking for?  While dancing? Is it to socialize? Meet new people? Reveal your dance moves or body? Before going out one has to be the judge of themselves who no one else can be the judge. What do you want? In Star Trek there is a saying when teleporting at least that's how I look at it. Don't reveal true feelings to everyone everything around you. And a bit of Shakespeare" What you shall reap ya shall sow"? So the question what is the ultimate goal of dancing? Mind you I was in super minis that night& I was making the sexiest girls dancing look bad. Simply.  Visit http://outcast-all.com

Edited by UsernameOptional
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Posted (edited)

I have danced in femme mode many times. Thrown a couple of.moves I never knew I had. Getting better with age, I guess.

 

:D

Edited by Gennee
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Posted

That was one of the first things that happened after becoming strongly in touch with my female sexual energy and anatomy. I happened to be listening to music and felt a strong desire to dance. It seemed to come out of nowhere since i never felt that way before, but i let go and danced around the room by myself. It was a strong visceral thing through my entire naked body. I still have never had this feeling in more male mode. I sort of combine both, though, in the graceful and very movement oriented way i play sports, which feels best and reaches my best level when it moves into a fast rhythm. I just realized that my skill in sports has always stemmed a lot from my androgynous, intersex nature... I also love that gender fluid term or image.  

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Posted

Yes I agree with blue moon above comment as I always knew I had lots of various energy inside me apart from indigenous types just the fact I like listening to techno, house, pop, soul & rap when ultimately last one in failing modes..awwe

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Posted

I am also fundamentally the same person, however, I find that when I am dressed en femme my femininity comes further to the forefront.  As a man my maleness is more present.  I have always loved to dance and I do not dance much differently which I attribute that the fact my body is male.  I cannot make those beautiful moves that the female body can make.  I have danced with my ex-wife and I would push all my maleness to the front and still enjoyed dancing.  I have also danced in the arms of a tall man and my femaleness easily came out.  Same goes with the sports I played, I played on highly competitive teams especially hockey and you have to use all your maleness in order to compete with the males at those high levels.  A female given a male body would do the same if she wanted to compete at the men's levels.  She would still be female inside but would not act that way if she was trying to hide who she was inside.  I know it is confusing.

Bonnie

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Posted

Oh yes femininity really takes over me when dancing and being led by an older man on the dance floor. All kinds of submissive and amorous feelings come to the forefront and love the attention.  Never was really into sports since I am so petite but when out now en femme mode I enjoy pllaying golf with my bf and probably enjoy it cause I dont have to compete and can just enjoy the outing as a playful girl

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