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ScottishDeeDee

Tips for being out all day

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OK so I have not been out yet, but something I daydream about is to go shopping and then go out for dinner or to watch a movie - one of the things that worries me is that when I am Dee around the house after a few hours I can see my stubble coming through my makeup, and when removing it my neck is so rough it tears the pads up - is there any helpful tips or advice?

I'm not sure I want to remove all the makeup, shave and then reapply it in a public restroom...

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Dear Dee Dee,

Please remember that by age 40, most cisgender women are dealing with hair where they don't want it to be, usually on the face.

There are many discussions about hair removal here on TGGuide, YouTube (search "hair removal for transgender women"), and Google the same.

There are solutions out there!

Yours truly,

Monica

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Get a really good razor. The kind with a single blade on the back. That’s good for under the nose. Don’t over do it though because you will scratch up your face. Shave with the grain then back against it. But be gentle. Use cream or I use conditioner. In all reality with your marriage and divorce pending I would just take it easy. Maybe some jeans and a top with little eye highlights. You don’t want to cause problems with the divorce. Have patience. Definitely get out a bit but just tone it down. IMO. 

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Hey Dee Dee, this topic is right up my alley and I just love talking about it! 😍  Mind you, I'm very new at it, but have been practicing in private and researching this for a long time, still have a lot more to learn, and have only gone public for the first time just 10 days ago.  Now I'll go public anywhere except my hometown and do every chance I get and loving it❤️.  

First thing, shaving?  Moisturize your face and neck often using a simple cleanser;  I use Neutrogena Ultra Gentle Hydrating Cleanser. (inexpensive). My shaver, Gillette Pro Glide 5 Blade.  Shaving cream I use now is one with Aloe.  Have tried Gels and others, but they didn't seem to work as well, for me at least. Lather well and I start against the grain, GO SLOWLY AND LIGHTLY!  Re-Lather and redo do if needed.  Then I go with the grain, again go slowly and lightly especially above the lip and the chin area.  Wash again with the Hydrating Cleanser. (Before rinsing you may want to shave again; the cleanser provides a shaving cream effect. GO LIGHTLY you don't want to shave skin off just the hair.  Then I use a Defoliating Cleanser, Olay- (expensive). This will remove the dead skin without irritating it.  Now you're ready for foundation. Start with foundation primer ( I use Smashbox)  4 dabs, one each on both lower cheeks, chin and above lip.  Blend in using your finger.  Then concealer, upper lip, chin, and jowls. Blend with a makeup sponge (moist one). If using liquid concealer, blend with brush). Then apply foundation. Oh! always use a lighter concealer than your foundation which should closely match your skin tone, and always apply everything lightly and in moderation. You can do another layer if needed. Lastly a "corrector" ..lighter than foundation shade, around the beard area. Before I always heard that orange lipstick was good for this, but a lighter tone corrector is much, much better. Then touch up again with foundation.  Then lastly a translucent setting powder (Very lightly), or a setting spray ( just got one from Sephora) and I prefer it, now. This will prolong the life of the make-up covering your beard most of the day.

You should be good to go all day now!!!!💇‍♀️  If you need a "quick" touch up in the evening you can use an electric shaver ( I use a decent quality three rotating head one), again shave lightly,..just the hair, not your skin.  then touch up again with a little concealer, foundation and corrector....should take about 10 minutes.  Good luck and have fun at it!  By the way, most people don't notice or care that you're going out at least that I've run into...just be your natural self. 

Jessica

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Yep, always had it, just know it now

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Thanks everyone, some good and apt advice. x After finding a youtube video I have been using the colour corrector first underneath my foundation as it lets me put less on and seems to work quite well, but I aim to go out with little to no makeup as the majority of my girl friends my age mostly stick to lipstick and mascara unless they are going on a night out or just need the boost, but that time is a long way away yet. I intend to try and start small, but by brain keeps putting all these little worries and doubts and I think setting myself goals will help to overcome them. :) 

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I need more practice! 😂 

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Will any of those girlfriends help you with your makeup.  I bet they would and it would also be a blast😄

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Hey Jess! Yep some have already offered and I just have to find the time to do it. One younger ftm friend is really excited to help me. He’s said “I have the perfect beach girl look for you” and he has all this makeup that he doesn’t need anymore. 😊  I want to make it fun and not rush through it and have a chance to keep it on for awhile. (My wife is not ready to see me in full makeup yet) It’s funny because they get all excited about the idea of helping me, I think they really want to see me all dolled up. 😂  I am glad it makes them happy and it’s pretty dam cute too see. All I want is a very light easy look. I’ll get there in time. I think tonight at group  I will bring up having a makeup night 😁

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Christy - it is one of the things I have found relaxing for the most part, kind of like self care me time, and it is funny how much I have picked up between watching my sisters and my ex-wife over the years.

Jessica - I have dreamt about it a couple of times, but while I know that for the most part my female friends will all be really accepting, I am only out to one of those female friends.  Ironically the one that I know would love to help the most as she loves playing with eye makeup, would also be the one that will naturally tell everyone else I know as she is a born gossip 😂 so at the moment I cannot risk it. x

 

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Dee I do enjoy it,  it is relaxing and fun. I’m still trying to keep my marriage together and she needs little baby steps. I am working my way into having her help me (I think it would be a fun bonding time for us) but now is not the time. I may have to just ask for her help though, like pulling a bandaid off. I’ll talk with my therapist about it next week just to bounce it off of her and see what she thinks. 

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I am not an expert and think I need to go lighter still with my foundation (us Scots are almost reflective we are so pale) but I bought it online after guessing as I cannot go into a store yet, which would be so much easier! I am sure you will know when the time is right for your relationship Christy, I wrote a post a while ago that compared questioning my gender as removing a plaster because you didn't know how much it was going to hurt or what you were going to find underneath! :) 

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I use a triple head Remington lithium electric razor. It takes me about 20 minutes to get a good shave if I've gone a day or 2 without shaving (since I don't go out every day), and I end up smoother than a baby's butt for the whole day. They work great, have a long life before you need to recharge them, and are easy as pie to clean.

IMG_2483.JPG

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