It has been about a month on hormones, all-in-all things have been going well, better. The meds have had a calming and emotionally stabilizing affect on me. However, self-doubts have crept in. It was particularly difficult this past weekend. Where I feel like I am throwing my life away, self-loathing, suicidal thoughts. And I have to keep reminding myself that there is a reason why I am where I am. Things don't happen for an accident. I've been diagnosed with gender dysphoria and have been dealing with this my whole life.
I was invited to a ladies bible study with mostly transwomen, but have been unable to make it so far due to things that have come up. I hope to make it June 29th, the next time they meet.
My wife is still having trouble talking about transition and I still need to talk with my kids. I will most likely say something to them when I travel with them for a week to my mom's this summer.