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  3. Lonely rainy night here in the Wyoming Valley!!





    1. Sapphire


      You are gorgeous 

  4. Hello all you wonderful people in cyberspace if interested let’s strike up a conversation. 

  5. Dear Jennifer, I thank G_D I have no children or grand children, and that my nieces.nephews and great nieces/nephews have avoided this rubbish! New York State has avoided this but Florida (where I got my high school junior and senior classes and university degree) has surely gone downhill . . . Yours in Sisterhood, Monica
  6. Where did we go wrong? How did we devolve into such a state that simple education is threatened by bigots? History and science are all but gone from the entire curriculum. Kids today will have no clue what a chromosome is, or what the civil war was. This is one of the most sickening times in recent American memory. There was even a man who wanted to eliminate math for being “woke”, whatever that is. When I was a kid, they didn’t hold back. They told us what American history was like. And they didn’t use any tact. Now the mere mention of slavery and the civil war is cause for immediate firing and huge fines. It seems that we’re the only ones that are ruled by cowards that are so fragile that they will completely collapse over anything that could possibly make them uncomfortable. I don’t see this kind of fascist 🤬 happening anywhere else. At least not in the civilized world. I want to puke up stuff I ate when I was 6. This 🤬 enrages me so 🤬 bad that I want to throw out the most vicious vulgarities imaginable. At some point I’m sure I would even end up creating a few new ones. They want us to be both ignorant and stupid. This is what the “greatest country on earth” is doing to its citizens. This is the freedom we brag so heavily about. I’m ready to move to a shack in Saudi Arabia or North Korea where at least I know that I hold no value. Not somewhere that tries to cover it up with lies and full on deception.
  7. I didn't plan on it. From what I hear, she's pretty much gone insane in the last few years. I also heard she has 3 kids and no clue who the father is. So apparently she sleeps around quite a bit. That's drama that I neither need nor want in my life. I have my own baggage to deal with, I don't want to be a bellhop for people I don't give half a rat's *** about.
  8. Jennifer, whatever you do, don't make contact!
  9. The freaky thing is that she lives with her parents who only live about 2 miles from me. We're practically in the same neighborhood. I know this because I drive by their house all the time when I have to go out, and see her a lot, thought she thankfully doesn't seem to notice me. Taking that route is unavoidable unless I want to add extra miles. And with the price of gas, I can't afford that. Still I just want to know why I'm thinking about her so much, and how to get her out of my head.
  10. Dear Jennifer, Sometimes suddenly passing away is marked by family/friends/lovers (ex's included) dreaming and thinking about them. Her spirit may be trying to contact you to say they are sorry for hurting you, even if it's long ago. They may have harmed many people so they might be contacting each to apologize. My take, anyways. Try to forgive them and tell them to go towards the light. Yours in Sisterhood, Monica
  11. I don't want her. That's not the issue. The issue is her being in my head. I want to be free of her again, but she just stays in my head like gum in my hair. But peanut butter ain't gonna fix this one.
  12. Dear Jennifer, If you met your ex from 20 years ago today, you would be very different people. It would be highly unlikely you would be friends, much less lovers. Her cheating on you shows there is much to be desired about her character. Be grateful that you have a woman who loves you for you! Your friend, Monica
  13. I’m having a hell of a time getting my ex out of my mind. I don’t know why, but she’s in my mind constantly. I can’t get her out. We broke up more than 20 years ago. But she is invading my mind and thoughts all the time. I ended things because I caught her cheating on me. I was in love with her. She broke my heart. But the memories are like locusts. They violate my thoughts every day. I think “What if….” all the time. I don’t know how to get rid of her. Adrianne isn’t happy about it, but says she understands. The thing is that until a few years ago, she NEVER crossed my mind. She and I were engaged. But all of a sudden, I was thinking about her all the time. I have no clue why. Help?
  14. The sad fact of the matter is that a lot of people will start throwing around complaints like "police state" or "detention centers". I replied to a YouTube video last year, offering ideas about things that could be tried to protect our children, such as armed security and bulletproof glass. Apparently that means I was trying to imprison children the same as the Nazis did in WW2. I never knew that I was a Nazi. Without our children, there is not hope for the future of this country. Dust won't give you back the Colosseum. New gun reform is more crucial today than ever. I'm a gun owner, and have a permit. I go to a shooting range and clean my guns regularly. I carry, only for the fact that I'm scared for my safety when I'm forced to go out. It's not a fashion statement. At least not one I would choose. I look around, and I see people losing their minds whining about their "second amendment rights" when they haven't even read the second amendment. If they had, they would have known that it only applies to a militia that is needed to protect and defend the country. It doesn't give citizens the right to own thirty AR-15's and have your children each holding one for a picture to send as a xmas card. You can thank Lyin' Boebert for that one. Despite being a gun owner, it should be a lot more difficult to obtain a firearm, and just as difficult to acquire the ammunition. The background checks should go deeper, and take more time to more thoroughly go through a persons background. If they farted on a ham sandwich when they were 6, that should be something they should know as that implies malicious behaviour from said 6 year old. (I was the 6 year old. Don't ask.) But then again, put 20 monkeys in a room, they won't give you Shakespeare.
  15. Like most everyone here, I didn’t “become” a woman. I just quit pretending to be a man. Mike didn’t “become” a man. He quit pretending to be a woman. I’m just scared that some of the things that are happening to us are on my head simply because I’m a transgender woman. I feel like those things are ruining Adrianne’s life because she’s with me. While I have to carry a diamond shield and armor, she doesn’t have any reason to need the same. If she was with a real man, her life would be immensely better. At least that’s what I think. She tells me I’m crazy when I say that, but the majority of the time, I think she’s just telling me what she thinks I want to hear. Depression is a major bitch. I’m manic as hell, a lot more these days. My medication doesn’t seem to be working like it used to.
  16. No. there is nothing wrong with you. It's been a pretty tough year not only for trans people, but also for all human rights in general, as I see it. Religion has become a powerful political force in forcing their own dogma upon the populace and is furthering to entrench their exclusionary views of right and wrong, normal and abnormal, morality and immorality. I feel like we are being forced back to a time around the civil war era and everyone should be concerned, women, children, any marginalized groups, Blacks, Asians; you can go on and on. I AM DEEPLY SADDENED THAT AFTER MY 68 YEARS ON EARTH, SO MANY LAWS ARE SUCCESSFULLY BEING PASSED THAT ARE ATTEMPTING TO WIPE OUT THE ABILILITY OF SO MANY PEOPLE TO SURVIVE, MUCH LESS SURVIVE WITH DIGNITY. Would I ever de-transition, though? Never. At this point in life, I have never been more happy, comfortable and confident in being who I genuinely am. And I have no doubt that society is far better served by my being out, too! Whether they like it or not. I believe this will pass someday. Trans has been a part of society throughout the ages and will always be.
  17. I’m laying here in bed with Adrianne. We were talking, and I asked her what I’m going to ask here. Is it wrong of me to wish I had never come out, and just continued to live as a man? It would be so incredibly much easier, but a lot more miserable too. I just don’t know what to think. So is it wrong of me to wish I had kept it to myself. That would be easier…… right? I guess I’m just scared to death about all the 🤬 that is happening against us. I fear for our lives just checking the mail. We have a court date this week, and I’m scared they’re going to rule against us simply because I’m trans. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can be who I really am, or pretend to be someone I’m not.
  18. Dawn13

    Part 3 Being a Man

    I too love Bambi. So hard to see me shooting a deer except with my camera. - I wear a bra all the time now except when I swim. Most of the time, I don't care if the bra straps are seen but I also have some bras that show more like a tank undershirt would. Yes - I am all for you - wear what you want and be who you are.
  19. Dear MaryEllen, I agree 💯 👍 percent! I think every school and house of worship should have well trained armed security!! I am 65 and I am amazed what the world has come to. My parents would have spun in their graves!!! Yours in Sisterhood, Monica
  20. My pitbull Lady had to be put down today. It still hasn’t fully sunk in yet, despite the fact that I’ve been bawling my eyes out all day. I wish it had been me who died today instead of her. I want to die. Life’s not worth living without her. She was my goddess. My heart and soul. I fell in love with her the instant I saw her picture online all those years ago. It’s been more than 10 years, but that was still not enough time. I’m going to find the best portrait artist in the country, and get her tattooed on me, with some of her ashes mixed into the ink. I know how to make jailhouse ink, so I’m thinking of giving myself a couple tats. I also know how to build a tattoo machine. I wish I knew exactly how old she was, but being that she was a rescue, and full grown when I got her, I honestly don’t know how old she was. I wrote something today, but at the moment I’m on my phone, which means I’ve probably made 40 typos and other screwups by now. If I can remember to, I’ll post what I wrote. It’s swear free, but like all my writings, dark. Depending on how you look at it.
  21. I am Satanic. I'm also Hellenistic, but we'll put that aside for this discussion. I'm a card carrying member of The Satanic Temple (TST). TST itself is a very active "church" if you will. We host protests and petition for religious equality and bodily autonomy. You have probably heard of the protest to place a Baphomet statue alongside the ten commandments monument on the grounds of the state capitol in Arkansas. Our view was that if one religion had the right to erect it's monument, then all religions should have the right. The backlash was huge, but our goal was achieved. It brought attention to the situation, which is all we wanted. Also in Scottsdale Arizona they have refused Satanic invocations at city council meetings but allowed Christians to give prayers at the meetings. That's another fight. We have our 7 tenets, the same way any religion has it's views. 1) One should strive to act with compassion and empathy toward all creatures in accordance with reason. 2) The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions. 3) One’s body is inviolable, subject to one’s own will alone. 4) The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one's own. 5) Beliefs should conform to one's best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one's beliefs. 6) People are fallible. If one makes a mistake, one should do one's best to rectify it and resolve any harm that might have been caused. 7) Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word. We believe that every individual should strive to be the best person they can. Sure most religions do, but many do not adhere to that. Valerie Tarico of Salon wrote that the tenets were egalitarian and "truer to the words of Jesus Christ than most Christians," referring to the tenets as expressing the primacy of compassion and empathy and conducive to a path to equanimity. We disagree with other Satanic organizations, and have been slandered by some. Our spokesperson is Lucien Greaves. He is the one to look to if you have questions. Also anyone who has Hulu should check out the documentary Hail Satan? as it's a great insight. You can also check the website as it gives a lot of insight to our activities. There's so much in our organization that I think a lot of people would consider joining if they only knew what it was. I'm not seeking conversions, just enlightenment's. I am a better person because of being Satanic. It has helped me reach an understanding that otherwise I never would have thought of. It has made me a stronger woman. I'm able to be the woman I am because of the teachings of Satanism. Below are a couple pics of actual billboards that we have put up.
  22. Most schools are and have signage that states that they are a gun free zone. This is an open invitation for any wingnut to come in blasting knowing there won't be any resistance. It's sad that it's come to this but schools should have armed security on site. All of our government officials have armed security so why not our most vulnerable. Our children. A zillion gun control laws can be passed but it won't stop a determined maniac who wouldn't abide by any gun law anyway. MaryEllen
  23. Dear Jennifer, School shootings are a daily occurrence! The US has more school shootings than any other country in the world. I don't know what the answer is, but I would probably homeschool my children or raise them overseas if I had children. Yours truly, Monica
  24. This country has gone completely loco. It used to be really rare for a shooting like we see now. Especially school shootings. Now they’re almost a daily occurrence. It seems that the most dangerous ages to be are from 3 to 9 years old. Children are in extreme danger anymore. If I was a parent, I would find the money to pull my kid out of school and hire a tutor. It seems that’s the only way to keep kids safe. Why the hell is this happening? That’s what I want to know. I’m also wondering if it has somehow become a sick rite of passage or something. Do the shooters even think prior to doing this? And if they do (highly unlikely) what thoughts do they have that could possibly justify killing the innocent? The children killed have never even had the opportunity to really start their lives. I’m just at a complete loss right now. I just wonder if the flags should just be left at half mast permanently. And often, the shooter is killed by law enforcement. Was that their ultimate goal? Were they ever taught any kind of morals? Do they have a hidden history of violence in any fashion? I’m as misanthropic as it gets, but I would never harm a child. Adults is a different story. But children are COMPLETELY OFF LIMITS. No one has the right to harm a child. I was beaten literally daily until I was 18 when my sperm donor finally died. I have intervened several times when I’ve been out to block the abuse aimed at a child. I just can’t possibly fathom why anyone would do such a thing.
  25. MonicaPz

    Part 6. What if...

    Dear More, Emma and Jessica, Please consider the Lesbian community. More, your wife should be open-minded about the Lesbian community. They have a lot of activities. I strongly suggest looking into Lesbian Connection Magazine. Also, Moe, since you have a wife, may I suggest you get active in transgender conferences. They often have significant other (SO) support groups. I am a cisgender mid-butch Lesbian, and the love of my life was a mid-femme transgender Lesbian. Don't give up! Yours in Sisterhood, Monica
  26. Jessicatoyou

    Part 6. What if...

    That's an entirely another topic. My own expectations were completely turned inside out and unexpected with respect to romantic relationships. I'll address that in another blog.
  27. Emma

    Part 6. What if...

    I have always believed our time alive is precious whether we're 10 or 100 years old and everything in between. It feels like there is more for us to lose in our 60s, 70s, and 80s if we follow our truth. I don't wish to push you in any direction. But maybe there's more to gain, too. We all will eventually die, and death is largely a solitary experience. I anticipate that when I'm laying there dying I'll reflect back and of course there will be regrets, but I'll also have pride that I finally did what I'd dreamed of for so many decades. The reality of being a senior is that romance is hard to find, let alone finding someone who'll embrace our being trans. The field at our age is smaller, many are already married or committed. So yeah, look for dates, but moderate your expectations. Don't transition in the hopes/plans that you'll finally be in a romantic relationship. But there are communities of support. They need you, you need them.
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