Well I don't know we're to start this is my first blog .  So I guess I will start with a little bit about myself .  Every  since I was a little  boy I had these thoughts in the back of my mind and then that led to me trying on girl  clothes at first I did not know how to take this but I felt  more  comfortable in girl clothes and know matter how much I new it was not normal I new I  could not tell anybody because I could not deal  with the disappointment that my parents and friends would have or me so I tried to suppress it in the back of my mind and do what the world thought was right and  be normal. Well as time passed I grew up into a teenager I had a lot of identity problems,  and I new who I was  on the inside  but I could not be that  person on the outside because I did not know how to deal with the humiliation from the rest of the world and from family and friends so what did I do I suppressed it some more by this time I got really good at hiding my feelings and not opening up to people like I should. And as more time passed I got married and had three kids and I know that now matter how much I wanted to tell  my wife the thoughts that was going through my mind I knew she would not now how to deal with something like that so I didn't tell her and that lead to a divorce because I did not want her to be disappointed in me for wanting to be a woman. Well hate to cut the story short but it's late and a girl's got to get her beauty sleep so goodnight and I will try to finish my story soon love to all and goodnight again.