My son just came out as trans 3 days ago. First thing I did was hop online. The first thing I read was a blog by a Mom of another Trans child. To paraphrase, it said:
Your child already knows it will be infinitely more difficult to live Trans than continue to pretend they are the wrong gender. By the time they tell you, they have thought a LOT about it. Whether they were talking to you about it or not, they have been thinking about it for a long time. It is not a phase. It is not a mistake. They will not grow out of it. They are not wrong. It just is.
Your son hasn't changed, he is just now being open and honest with you. I have to keep reminding myself of what that other Mom said - there is so much truth in it. As I see it, this isn't about us. It isn't about how anyone else judges us as parents; except for our children. It matters that they see us loving and supporting them no matter what. It matters that their siblings see it and know they will be supported and loved and that the siblings see it is OK for them to accept our sons.
I went shopping for boy clothes for my son today, and it was FUN! I made sure to use masculine pronouns with him. I still can't use his new name, but baby steps, right?
