Content tagged 'trans'
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By Olivia68, postedWhen the original series of Will and Grace entered my life on television back in the 90s I was still serving in the Army. It was a different time. If you knew someone who was gay you became an outcast and if you watched the show you became the target for bullies. Luckily I'm not a small framed person and I lived off post so nobody knew my secrets and I'm not one to be bullied by anyone.
One thing that show taught me was that no matter who you are it's always acceptable to be your true self as long as you don't purposely hurt others.
The return of this hit comedy airs tonight on NBC and I can't wait to see Will, Grace, Jack and Karen reunite for serious discussions on sex, politics and every day life.
Enjoy the show GIRLS!!
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By KarenPayne, postedTwo nights ago myself, two Microsoft managers and three Microsoft engineers formed a panel on inclusion and diversity in the workplace. The settings, a room filled to capacity (guessing 400), two wine bars, cheese and crackers. We sat on stage, each with our own microphones. Yes the entire event was video taped by a professional team.
After a ten minute introduction by the sponsor (a Microsoft program manager) a question was asked, each one of us responded then moved on to the next question. At the end the audience was given the chance to ask the panel questions but nobody took advantage of this but at least for me five people came up either to ask questions or to say how proud they were of me for doing this. One even asked for my email as they are dealing with a transgender child.
The event was scheduled for a mere 30 minutes. I said up front this needs not to be constrained by time and they agreed which is good because the event lasted over one hour.
When being driven back to my hotel I noticed a high number of notifications on my Twitter account, wow, lots of followers from the event, way cool.
Next day I had several people come up to me at other events and said they enjoy hearing me speak.
Oh, I was torn between indicating I was formerly male for the first question/give a short intro of yourself but ended up indicating by past. Got some blank stares like "really". What blow my mind was after talking about why we need transgender people in tech and why they are not (thinking fully transitioned vs in the closet) all I could focus on was the majority of people were applauding me which is a huge step not so much for me but for the transgender community at large.
Never thought I would be an advocate at this level but now so happy that I can be part of making people aware that the majority of transgender people are assets if given the chance rather than being part of low-income part of society. I did point out that like cisgender people there are indeed un-balanced people in the transgender community so we area in one sense of the word all cut out the same with a chemical imbalance (or is it balanced).
With that I would like to see others educate cisgender people showing them in a positive manner we are here, normal people that truly want to contribute to society, be loved, have friends and family and live together.
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So we (my wife and I) did it. We finally inflicted Daniella on an unsuspecting public for the first time. Wow, what fun! The evening was a crossdresser/transvestite/trans person/drag queen etc (all protocols observed I hope) friendly party held at a local (gay) club/bar. It was therefore a friendly place to go to for a first time, shy and nervous girl.
The evening was a real clandestine affair; there may be a future for us in military intelligence after all. After attending a family oriented afternoon social, we got home at 7 pm. I showered, did a final hair removal and face shave. We then waited for the babysitter to arrive. We said our goodbyes etc and went to the (unoccupied) guest flat on our property where I had stashed my kit and got dressed, painted nails, and did make-up and hair. My wife went to get the car and I locked up and waited outside. At that point disaster struck! The babysitter came out to see why the car was moving (she had expected us to be gone by then and was afraid someone was stealing the cars). I don't know if she saw me or not as I beat a hasty and slightly wobbly retreat, into the shadows, in my stilettos. Oh well, no point crying over spilled milk.
We drove to the venue which took about 10 minutes. I was expecting police roadblock with full body searches at every corner (police road blocks are a feature of life in South Africa), but it seems the South African Police intelligence gathering regarding first time crossdressers inflicting themselves on the innocent public is woefully (and thankfully) inadequate.
We arrived at the club and parked the car we could see a few other trans people, crossdressers, drag queens etc standing outside the club and that made me feel better; I was very keen to get in.
I got out the car as elegantly as I could (hopefully I didn't flash the security guard: Paris Hilton has my sympathies) and in we went.
I had made contact with a few of the attendees on Facebook beforehand and they recognized us right off. They were welcoming, friendly and supportive of both me and my wife. I have seldom been made to feel so much a part of a new group of people so quickly. We got drinks and chatted (I probably bored them all with my story of the babysitter, but I suspect they all remember their first time and appreciate the stress involved).
We danced, we talked, we walked around a bit and danced some more. It was great. There was another crossdresser's wife there so my wife had company too which was very nice.
There was a self-confessed 'tranny chaser' at the club who looked me up and down but kept his hands to himself, not sure if I should be insulted or not?
At around 11-30 my wife had developed a headache and was not feeling too good (loud music is not really her thing), so we left. I could have stayed as I did not want the night to end but we are in this together so we walked through the parking lot greeted the security guard and got in the car as elegantly as I could.
My wife drove us home and once again the police's intelligence gathering proved to be far from adequate as we arrived home unmolested.
Once we pulled in to the drive way I reluctantly pulled my jeans and jersey on over my dress, took off my wig and earrings and replaced my stilettos with street shoes. I walked into the house and made a beeline for my bathroom while my wife relieved the babysitter.
My wife and I spoke lots about this on Sunday night (first chance we had) and we both had so much fun! We are up for it again and are looking forward to more adventures.
It was so good being out dressed and being accepted for who and what we are. I do have to work on my presentation skills and especially the behaviours; it is easy to 'lapse' into male behaviours.
I appreciate going to a (gay) night club hosting an evening for crossdressers/drag queens etc isn't quite the same thing as shopping, eating etc in 'general public' but it was still a big step for me. There will be more such adventures to follow I am sure.
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Star date August 2014
So, I had my second trip out and about this weekend.
We reprised our trip to the same trans friendly gay club/bar we went to last time as we both felt comfortable there and really enjoyed the vibe, the crowd and the venue.
The weather has been a bit iffy so instead of the sleeveless cocktail dress I was going to wear I went with floral jeggings, a nude shoulder blouse and my closed high heels (first time I have worn closed heels for any length of time). I accessorized with some floral jewellery and a flower hair clip (it WAS a spring party and I felt the need to make an effort).
We forgot to draw cash on Saturday morning, so on the way to the club we stopped at our local service station and I drew some cash from the ATM. Stepping out of the car in full sight of people who may or may not be sympathetic was a bit of a thing, but I felt I had to do it. It was all very new and a little nerve wracking. Especially when a car pulled up right behind me and the two guys didn’t get out but watched me going about my business. I got my cash, stuffed it into my bag and made a beeline for the car.
We went to the club and danced, chatted, caught up and met some new people, had a drink, all the usual stuff. I was in a very festive mood and danced more than usual. It was a lot of fun and I was far more relaxed than the first time out. I realised that sandals are far easier to dance in than closed shoes but I didn’t let that minor detail get in my way. What a lot of fun!
Then a very unexpected (well for naive little me anyway) thing happened. My wife said that she had overheard some of the men at the bar discussing me. I said she must have been mistaken. Anyway some time later one of the men wandered over from the bar and put a drink down in front of me and then put his hand on my back, asking if I wanted it. He rubbed my back in a friendly sort of way.
I was so surprised! I mean intellectually I knew this could happen but I didn’t expect it to happen to me. Anyway I was literally speechless (which is rare for me). Fortunately one of the other girls came to my rescue and engaged him in conversation while I did my deer in the headlights impersonation (please note this is not the most effective way of dealing with these situations). He lost interest and left. I feel bad but it was just so unexpected (and ever so slightly flattering and disquieting all at the same time). So I have resolved to practice some polite, humorous but firm put downs just in case I need these in future. I kind of thought having my wife around as ‘bouncer’ would be sufficient deterrent but it seems I was wrong. Fortunately my wife was ok with it all and found it somewhat amusing.
We met some lovely new people, had a nice conversation about shopping and stuff and then and then we left a little later.
I was on a natural high and therefore asked my wife to drive us a round for a bit whilst we chatted. Sadly it seems the South African Police Services ‘Tranny Intelligence Division’ seem to be getting more on the ball as we saw a police roadblock in the distance. My wife diverted down some side roads and we got home without incident. I am still not ready to face a police officer and explain the situation to him or her.
What a lovely night out.
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