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I'd like to introduce myself. Hi I'm Benjamin. I'm a T-guy who lives in Connecticut. Before I go any further let me answer some quick questions I always get. No I'm not rich. No I know being a Trans guy doesn't make me the world's foremost expert on anything and yes I'm aware being a T-Man doesn't make me special. Yes I'm aware that occasionally I capitalize random words for no reason. This blog may come off as rant sometimes. Sometimes my mind moves too fast for my fingers to keep up. Sometimes my fingers move too quickly for my keyboard. For all these things, I apologize. That's all I apologize for. Moving on to more important things than me. With the emergence of Laverne Cox there is a wave of concern about Trans-gender rights that has really brought to light the misconceptions that others have about us. Starting with our genitals and ending with our hearts. People generally get confused about how to address me. It's simple. My pronouns are: HE, His, And Himself. I am not afraid to correct people. I am not afraid to ignore those who use my birth name. I am not afraid to answer any questions they have about my gender status, because I consider myself to be an ambassador between our community and the Cisgender folks. I am an open book, mostly, but I still dread answering the first two/three questions when I come out to new people. You know the first round of questions that people usually tactlessly allow to careen out of their mouths. Coming out and staying out is a continual process for me, Like most people. I find the first question to pop into everyone's mind is usually one of two questions. 1. So you're going to get a Sex change? 2. Does that mean you want to date me? (Usually from females. OR so if you're guy does that mean your boyfriend is gay?) No matter how many times I'm asked the first question, I'm never quite prepared to respond. I'm not quite sure why it seems perfectly plausible to ask me about my genitals. It always leaves me explaining to people why it's rude. Which is a completely different bit of awkwardness entirely. I hope this isn't common ground for everyone who is transgendered, but I fear it is. After my lengthy explanation, or defense in some cases, of my gender status I am generally besieged by my other least favorite question/s. My gender status has nothing to do with whom I date. I'm not quite sure why it matters. I'm also not quite sure why younger females automatically assume I'm into them. I think that it has less to do with me and more to do with our society's stereo type of Butch lesbians/ Transmen. We are not the same. Not by long shot. I suppose that Trans-Ladies suffer the same deal with being lumped in with Drag Queens. Not that any of the aforementioned people are to be viewed in any sort of negative light. Just a comparison. I personally date a man. When I state this People generally ask, "Well then doesn't that make your boyfriend gay?" My partner as I call him, doesn't really care what's in my pants. We as a species are all too concerned with fornication. I've been told I'm just trying to be a gay guy. That I'm confused, and I've endured plenty of inappropriate jokes about who's doing whom in the butt. After all the unpleasantness I can safely say that I am confident in my Identity and He is still confident in his, and while we may not know how to define ourselves for other to understand, it doesn't really matter what other people think. Now does it? We're two boys who're in love. Comments?
