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Came out to a Best friend today

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Today Was a good day,   came out to a dear friend and.   Still have and probably will for a while have some ups and down with the wifey mainly because the fear of loosing her man but hey she's gaining a woman.   I know i need to assure her that I am not going anywhere and I will always be here.    This blog will be full of our thoughts about transition.   I made the appointment today to get hormones.  I am debating wether or not to start them before or after our month long vacation before Christmas and new year.    I think I would like to start them as soon as I get them but L is afraid I will ruin the Holidays with teenage puberty.    I don't think I will,  I think it could be a beautiful time with the Children and L in the mountains as I begin the journey to womanhood.     I actually felt a flutter in my stomach after the appointment as made.    I think its really going to happen and I am going to free the inner Beauty I used to call her Erica when I was younger but I have found it easier to go by DEE DEE since those are my initials. whichever name I choose to keep is our decision and no one else.    I will be happy when I have breast growth and when my hair and face are more feminine and I will be so thrilled the day I can have this headache removed from between my legs.   That day will come.   I know it will.    I hate my male genitals; I have hated them for years.   They serve a purpose and that was to make babies and we did we made 2 awesome boys.   Daddymommy needs to be freed of the enslavement of this meat mass.    this is just how I am feeling today.   I sure hope L post something later.    

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I thought your name was DeeDee. Am I incorrect? My middle name is actually Joy! 

About starting HRT: I am going to assume that your doctor is going to do what mine did, and that is to start you on a low dose for a couple of months. You'll then have a blood test to see where your estrogen and testosterone levels are, which is a baseline reading they use to determine what dose to go to next. For me I did experience a little euphoria with the start of HRT (I started just under two months ago) but nothing like teenage emotions or puberty. All changes are minimal at best. 

About your wife: the order of the day is patience with her. This change of yours is huge for her. It's big for you too of course but you've been living in your mind and body with your feelings for so long. It may be best for her peace of mind (and your marriage) to start the HRT after vacation. What's another month?


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We are still tossing around names.  Deedee would be easy because it is her initials anyway, but if we had a girl in our family, we always said we would name her Joy.  We just had our 2 boys, and that name, Joy, has always felt like it belonged in our family, and since we couldn't give it to one of our kids, this seems like an option.  It is still under discussion :)

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I think Joy is a very nice name. I chose it as my middle name because of a young woman who I worked with at an Italian restaurant when I was in HS (long ago in a galaxy far away). She said, "I'm Barbara Joy to the world!" I loved her upbeat personality. 

I seem to recall that I published a blog post about my choice of first name. It's no big deal but might be interesting. 

Indeed, Deedee is a common woman's name. It's friendly, recognizable, and certainly feminine. Maybe Deedee Joy?

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