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Everything posted by Bonnie

  1. The citizens of Anchorage have spoken -- and they’ve said loud and clear “NO” to Proposition 1. Over the past few weeks, we have been inspired by the many individuals and groups who have come forward in opposition to Proposition 1. It was amazing to be a part of a campaign that centered on transgender Alaskans who bravely shared their stories. This campaign gave us the opportunity to hear from countless allies who stood up for justice when we needed their voices. Churches and corporations, community leaders and private citizens, families, friends, and neighbors rallied around our message: Anchorage will not bring back discrimination. We will not cave to hatred and fear. We will not roll back civil rights for any of our citizens. ... http://www.alaskanstogether.org/victory_pro_equality_anchorage_voters_defeat_anti_transgender_bathroom_bill
  2. I have recently taken another step forward in my ventures in public as a woman. My first step out in public was unforgettable as I am sure it was for everyone. It was many years ago and in another city than the one I live. Everything was done safely and with a group to TG friendly gay clubs. I went twice a year in subsequent years but never out in my own city. Going to Toronto twice a year for 2-3 days was getting expensive and it was not enough for me. I began looking for places to go out here in my city. My next step was to drive en femme. I went to see someone just outside my city and then back home again. Exhilarating! I went to a TG and admirers party dressed. A club became available that had a TG night once a month which I went to dressed. Leaving my apartment and going to my car as a woman was becoming easier to do. My next big step was to go to a public annual event called Sexapalooza, now called Taboo, where the sex shops would advertise their products, shows and educational seminars were given over a weekend. I went dressed a few years ago but had to park in shopping mall tower parking. I had to walk through the whole mall to find my way to the Centre where the event was being held. That was huge. I have taken a guy shopping for women's clothes during the day. I was dressed and he was in male attire. I took him to Value Village then a box store called Pennington's. I gave him not only moral support but clothing advice. Last year I went to watch the Pride Parade wearing a nice black with white polka dots dress. I went alone. I have been to a number of the city's hotels to meet with a man I know who flies to town from the west on business. He likes to role play and at first I went in male mode and dressed in the bathroom then decided it would be much easier to just go as a woman. Which brings me to my next huge step. He has been wanting to see me the last few months but the closest he was going to get was Toronto. He asked if I would go to see him if he paid for my flight? He flies often so he has a lot of frequent flier points and he would pay for my same day return flight. He would be staying at the hotel at the airport. I couldn't pass up this opportunity and was determined to have a new experience. I went on March 6. Flew out at 4:30 pm and was back by midnight. I was treated like any other woman by everyone and had no issues with security. I had used my male name on the ticket so that it would match my driver's license. I do not pass completely but wore clothes that did not particularly draw attention other than the fact I was wearing nice clothes. 3" black pumps, stockings, just above the knee length black skirt, a nice blouse with 3/4 length sleeves, knee length overcoat, nice black purse and a carryon bag. I wore my sunglasses as much as possible but put them on my head when lighting was not good. Another first I will not forget! Bonnie
  3. Bonnie

    Makeup Kits

    I don't buy any kits and just go with whatever I like for each item. Sometimes it is the brand I like and other times it is the colour that is available along with cost. The only thing I am particular about are my brushes. I will pay higher costs for them. Mac are my brushes of choice.
  4. Be as cautious as any woman would be anywhere she goes. Walking alone at night is a danger in itself and going into a club alone without knowing what to expect is as dangerous. I would advise that if you want to go to a club as a woman then be sure it is one that is TG friendly, usually a gay club but not always, ones with drag shows are good. If you are going alone then expect to be hit on.
  5. July 31, 2017 CBC News Politics http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/fallon-aubee-transgender-inmate-1.4215594 Canada's federal prison service has approved the first transfer of a transgender inmate to an institution based on gender identity rather than physical anatomy, CBC News has learned. Fallon Aubee, who has been serving a life sentence at B.C.'s Mission Institution, told CBC her request to move to a women's prison has been approved, and she will be transferred to Fraser Valley Institution for Women on Tuesday. ....
  6. Here is an article about Harrison Browne who was playing hockey as her birth gender in women's hockey and will be leaving the league to transition to male. I am not sure if he will continue to play by switching to men's hockey. https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2017/03/24/transgender-athlete-harrison-browne-will-retire-in-order-to-transition.html ​The second artile is about Jessica Platt who is MtF playing hockey for a women's team. “I want people to know you don’t have to quit pursuing your dreams to be the person you were meant to be,” she said. https://www.thestar.com/sports/hockey/2018/01/11/toronto-furies-forward-jessica-platt-comes-out-as-first-openly-transgender-cwhl-player.html I play a lot of hockey myself and am presently playing 3-5 times a week with various groups. The Wednesday group about half the guys know I am transgender and have no problem with it. They have yet to see me dressed as female but have seen photos. I would come out to more but my two children do not know I am TG and my ex does not want me to tell them. If it does somehow get back to them then so be it and I will come out more fully. I am happy to see that sports is becoming more open and welcoming to the LGBT community. Bonnie
  7. I think that it would be extremely difficult to come out if you are a celebrity because of the huge amount of attention you are going to get. I had worried about what I would do if I had made it to the National Hockey League, which I was attempting to do. Two things, how could I go out secretly and what would happen if I was caught and had to come out? Coming out on your own terms is best but it has to take a huge amount of courage in my opinion. I also know how extremely difficult it is for any of us to come out. I will listen and empathize with anyone who is coming out with equal attention. The amount of attention due to social status will not change until it no longer matters to anyone equally. "Oh did you hear so and so came out as ...." "So what." Bonnie
  8. I am sure Lisa will be great! Remember makeup depends on where you might be going when you wear it. Be sure to shave with sharp razors, heat your face first with hot water, then the cream, then shave then moisturize your face. Clothes shopping is as discussed on another post. Lisa will not be able to take you to the women's stores she knows unless she is a tall as you. When you do find a store for tall women she can go with you. Be sure the store will let you use the change rooms. Lisa can find out for you. Voice.... yes yes yes. I need so much practice. I still go out and I try to soften my voice. I don't exactly pass so no big deal if my voice gives me away. I still need to practice though. Many good videos on YouTube.
  9. Hi Davi! BTW I am on FetLife too! Ottawa (BonnieR) 3 " heels for me puts me around 6'2". I tower over many women but not all. I am average height when I am with transwomen. Most if not all major cities have stores for tall women and they usually sell shoes too for large feet. I take 13 womens if they are close toed and 12 if they are open toed. I have one pair of flats which I haven't worn outside yet. Maybe this summer. The only shapewear I use are breast forms. I have tried hip and ass shapers but they just didn't look right and they were lost in a purge. If you ever think of purging don't!!!! Contact me if you do and we will talk. Do not wear heels if you are not going to have something firm underfoot like a floor, concrete, asphalt, etc. Sure they make your legs look great but if you are on grass or sand or dirt then your heels will sink in. You will have to tip toe around. I hope this helps. Bonnie
  10. Bonnie

    Is There A Place For Short-Term Relationships?

    Do not give up what you have until you are absolutely sure you are bettering your present situation. Date but stay living separately. I am sure you can have sleepovers at each others places. That way you will get to know whether or not you can deal with the other persons idiosyncrasies. I can't see the pet thing being worked around so make sure that is in your Profile if you are using a dating site. I am not looking for a partner nor am I a so called moral person. I am looking for sex and am having a lot of fun. A few of my men have been long term and the others are occasional. One man did ask me if we could be exclusive and I said no and why. He accepted my reasons and comes to see me at least once a week. It is working well for me. I am going out more often now because I found a club where I could meet other transwomen so my translife is expanding even at my age. I am being complimented by men, women and other transwomen for my appearance and my openness. My sexual needs are being met and my social needs are also being met. If by some chance I do meet the man for me then so be it but I am not looking for him nor do I actually think I will meet him. I am living one day at a time. I have two other outlets that keep me going too. I play a lot of hockey, as a guy, and afterwards there is beer and food so I am having a social life. I did come out to about 8 players of one group I play with so we do talk about it at times but not often. The other outlet is a cyber world called Second Life (SL). I go there most evenings and I started out as a pre-op transwoman but am now a woman for all intents and purposes. I live a very happy life there and especially since I bought a better computer over a year ago. It is a great place for those who live alone and can't get out much and you can create a beautiful young looking avatar. Because of my lack of finances because I was married before I have worked as a stripper for most of my time in SL. The money I made, in their currency, allowed me to buy clothes and a rent a place to live. I am now a DJ at the club I was a stripper at. Drama still occurs there because people are still people. I state all this just to tell you how I have been coping with living alone. It is not for most but maybe you can find something I do or think helpful. Bonnie PS When I say I am not a moral person it is because many of the men are married. To me that is not my issue it is the men's. I did not go looking for them they found me.
  11. There are brick and mortar stores that have clothes and heels in large sizes. By large sizes I mean for Plus sizes and then there are stores for tall sizes. These stores usually have dealt with transwomen and what I did was to phone ahead and talk to someone about whether or not the store is comfortable with my friend trying on clothes there. One store said they would stay open for an hour longer or come in when the store first opens since there is usually no one shopping right away. Another store said it was perfectly ok. My friend went in drab and I went en femme to support him. We went to the store that said it was ok. I chatted with the sales woman as she helped my friend. He was buying a bra and panty set and was measured and tried some on. I had already taken him to a thrift store where he bought a number of things. He would hold things up and I would give my opinion on it. No one gave us a second look. Well if they did it was no big deal. I was dressed quite respectfully.
  12. Thank you Monica, I will delete some of the messages. Bonnie PS I want so badly to make a smartass comment on my box being full. But I won't. hmmmm I think I did anyway.
  13. The good thing about Transparent, and I am not saying I didn't like the program I am just being over critical, is that ii is part of a larger picture. The more programs about and /or including trans-characters is the exposure we are getting. Society is seeing us on tv and we are being talked about. I am coming out to more of the hockey players I play with. They are fine with it. Bonnie
  14. I am a fence straddler also on who should play transpeople like in Transamerica. Bree was played by Felicity Huffman who did a wonderful job of it. I would need to see options from the trans-actors. I am also on the fence on whether or not I like the program. Not only is the family dysfunctional but so is Maura. Maura is also over-reactive as far as I am concerned. What does the general public think about transpeople based on Maura's character? I am not sure. Bonnie
  15. Even though I have had sex with men and women I had never considered myself bi or gay. I know I would be classified as bi and I have had gay sex but what do you call it when your mind is thinking different things. I was told that SEX is in the mind. So when I had sex with women my mind was predominately male and when I had sex with men my mind was predominately female. To me I was having hetero sex no matter who I was having sex with.
  16. Hi Chantelle! Welcome to TG Guide! I do understand the need for pantyhose especially when your skirt or shorts are short or for officewear. Bonnie
  17. Bonnie

    I hate shoes!

    We have Long Tall Sally here in Ottawa, Canada and I have been. Very nice store. They sell clothing too.
  18. Bonnie

    The Gay Turtle

    It is very sad that people care so much about what your orientation is and they are not even looking for a partner since they have one already. I think people fear that their children or grandchildren will be LGBT and so they will not provide them with natural children. If we can make it socially unacceptable to be LGBT then the next generation will live hetero lives whether they want to or not. This really means that we don't give a damn about you and we care about ourselves more and what people think about me. You being LGBT will cause me to be embarrassed among friends and family. And I really don't want to think about how you have sex!!! OMG!!! In the situation the video examines I don't see anyone planning on buying two turtles or saying they need a female or male one because the one they have at home is male or female. They are buying just one turtle so what difference would it make? Briannah, since the people were acting it is difficult to say how many people actually come into the shop to buy a turtle. Bonnie
  19. Bonnie

    Virginia Ties

    Thank you Erica. My comment was simply to complicate things in a humourous manner. You are correct and I feel the same way, transgenderism should not be a complicated thing to understand. Love, no matter the gender, should not be a complicated thing but for some reason it is. This site is here to support and to educate. We support each other and we educate each other. Once we understand ourselves both as an individual and as a group we can go out and support and educate others. I have been doing that much more in this past year and plan to do more this coming year. Bonnie
  20. I just found some additional info; Dear SCTC family,It is with a heavy heart that we must announce that 2016 was the last The Southern Comfort Transgender Conference (SCTC) as you have known it for the past 26 years.What most of you don’t know is that we, the Southern Comfort Board of Directors (both current and a couple of past members), have been involved in a five year lawsuit that only recently concluded. Please don’t ask. As part of the settlement, we cannot discuss it at all. Suffice it to say that it was a five year nightmare that completely handcuffed the BOD. Some have wondered why there were no new people brought onto the board. Now you know. Anyone that would have joined the BOD would have become unnecessarily involved in the litigation. Fortunately, we did have liability insurance and that covered the legal fees of the case. However, as a result of being in a five year lawsuit, we were dropped by our insurance company (though they were obligated to continue until the lawsuit was resolved, which they did). Subsequently, SCTC had to find a new insurance policy. Only two companies would even offer a policy to us. Our premium went from $1300.00/year with no deductible to $11,000.00/year with a $25,000.00 deductible. We just can’t afford this and, this lawsuit proved that we (the current BOD) simply cannot afford to run the conference without insurance. Had we not had the insurance policy, we would have been personally liable. There is talk amongst a couple of the BOD to try to reorganize SCTC into something very new. Please continue your Facebook and Yahoo group presence to stay informed; any future updates on any plans will be posted to keep you informed. Otherwise, any money that is left in our account, which is being held in escrow by our attorney, will be donated to a worthy trans organization. We’re sorry to bring you this sad news right before the holidays, but you deserve to know what’s going on. It has been our extreme honor to serve you all throughout the years and we wish you all the best! With love, Your SCC/SCTC Board of Directors: Shanti Keshavi devi dasi (Stefanie Schumacher) Alexis Dee Christy Anderson Phyllis McCall http://transgriot.blogspot.ca/2016/12/southern-comfort-conference-shuts-down.html ​BOD I am assuming means Board of Directors Of course without knowing what they were sued for and why they lost makes it very difficult for other conferences to guard themselves against the very same thing don't you think? Bonnie
  21. I wonder what they were sued for and from the sounds of it they must have lost a large sum.
  22. Bonnie

    Virginia Ties

    Hi Monica! I am older than you. ​ I know the expression quite well I just like to put in comments to throw people off kilter a bit. As far as my age goes I do my best not to act it. I am 64 and act like a 25 yo. I wished I looked like one I quite often dress like one but that depends on where I am going or what my dates like to see me in. Anyway, thank you my dear for the explanation. Hugs Bonnie
  23. Bonnie

    Virginia Ties

    Apples and oranges are different?