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  1. i remember when i first realized that i wasn't like my brothers, that i was like my sisters. it seemed like a delicious secret  but .it didn't take too long for that delcious secret to become a nightmare. By age 5 i prayed that God would make me a girl (i still do). From age 8 until i was18 i dressed in my sister's clothes daily. It always felt soo right to be wearing girl clothes and always i felt calm, the only time in my days when i did feel calm. Until was 11 i thought that i was the only one like me. At age 11 I read about Jan Morris and for the first time i thought that maybe i wasn't alone.
    When i turned 18 the impossibility of being me was overwhelming, everyday all day i would see other girls and ladies and feel the pain of not being able to be openly like them. i became angry at being trans and even hating me being me. In the next years i ran from me fell in love, got married had 4 children earned 2 degrees all the while hating the best part of me and always when i would pause i would feel the same pain of not being me only every day every year the pain grew worse, it still does. 
    For those of you who are young and hesitating to transition please do whatever it takes to transition. You can run from being trans but it won'ty go away. YOU CAN"T RUN FROM THE BEST PART OF YOURSELF no matter how hard you run or how faryou run. Please don't be cowardly like me and find yourself at 59 years of age hurting soo badly because you need to be the woman you were born to be. May we all love the person we are and be willing to do what it takes to be true to ourselves everyday of our lives. i fear that for me it probably is too late but there are some wonderful things that have happened to me. My maternal instinct makes me an outstanding special educator and i now have grown to love the girl i am.
     
    To any who might be reading this, please know that you and i are friends whom i haven't met yet. i will love you forever.
     
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  2. I was born a woman in a mans body. I've known this since my earliest memory but growing up during the 70s and 80s in Southern California and being raised by two very conservative parents made life heartbreaking and filled with pain.
    I wasn't strong enough to go against my parents and now at the young age of 50 it's still difficult.
     I think about how different my life will become and it excites me to think that one day I'll be able to transform into the woman I've always hidden from the public. It's going to take a lot of work—surgical and hormonal— but the end result for me will be liberating and glorious. 
    When I was younger I would wear my sisters dresses as often as I could. One day in my sophomore year of high school my mother caught me in a dress. I spent the next two years in counseling being told it was unacceptable to feel the way I did. In 1986 when I graduated from high school I was forced by my parents to enlist in the United States Army in order to make me a man. I retired after serving 25 years. During my career I fought the urge to be who I was inside. I married three times but that never lasted. I was always jealous of my wives. I wanted to be a wife too. I've begun the necessary steps to happiness. Will it be easy? Absolutely not but anything this important shouldn't be an easy process to traverse. I have several roadblocks ahead of me; weight loss, the looks I'll get when coming out in public for the first time (I'm 6'3" 250 lbs) but I even though I know tough times are ahead I'm still driven to become the woman I was born to be. ​I quit my job and moved 1,400 miles to Seattle with the hopes of finding a job where I can transition and continue on with becoming Olivia.This will be the first of many blogs depicting my journey.I hope you'll join me by following in on this new grand adventure. 
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  3.   NICOLE PELLETIERE | 18 March 2017
    "Maison said in June that Corey was bullied for being transgender when she was younger. The first incident was when a child pushed her down a hill covered in frozen ice, causing injuries to Corey's face. Eventually, Corey was moved to another school as a result of the bullying, Maison said."  -- gma.yahoo.com
    Dad and daughter transition together from mother and son: 'If she can do it, so can I'
  4. I still cannot, for the life of me, figure out why the murders of transgender poeple are NEVER immediately thought to be, believed to be, speculated that or suspected of being, a hate crime - only statements are made like (paraphrasing), "officials have not commented on whether the murder will be investigated as a hate crime," or "it's unknown if this will be concidered a hate crime," or "the murder is not being investigated as a hate crime at this time," etc., etc., etc..  Even in murders where their is unmistakable, viciously brutal over-kill, no one will even say, "this looks like a hate crime."   It's like they go total stupid about it.
    I don't get it.
    27 February 2017 | by Stefanie Gerdes
    "At least one news station – New Orleans’ WWL-TV – misgendered her, and a number of others used Chyna’s dead name." --gaystarnews.com
    Performer shot down in New Orleans is fifth trans woman to be killed in the US this year
  5. If we were to educate on the basics, giving the general public a foundation of knowledge, a common vocabulary, I believe we would get further faster.
  6. I made this film a couple years ago to use in some of my early lectures. It's an overview and certainly doesn't cover all who feel they fit the term transgender, but many might find it helpful. Most of my education isn't directed to transgender people themselves, but instead to the general public so they can gain a better understanding. Often the people I'm speaking to work in the mental health system in some way.
     
  7. 24 July 2016 } James Withers
    "The largest LGBTQ civil rights organization in the country  made the announcement today (24 July). She  is scheduled to speak on the assembly’s last day (28 July). Chad Griffin, the organization’s president will also speak that day.  -- gaystarnews.com
    Democratic convention makes history with first openly transgender speaker
  8. Peter Hancock | June 2, 2016
    "His remarks came during debate over a nonbinding resolution condemning the Obama administration's new guidelines on Title IX compliance that instruct schools to allow transgender students to use restrooms and locker rooms and to participate in other sex-segregated activities that correspond to their gender identity."  --ljworld.com
    Psychiatric consensus: Kansas lawmaker’s claim that transgender people are ‘insane’ is false, misguided
  9. Pearson McKinney | June 19, 2016
    "The Navajo refer to Two Spirits as Nádleehí (one who is transformed), among the Lakota is Winkté (indicative of a male who has a compulsion to behave as a female), Niizh Manidoowag (two spirit) in Ojibwe, Hemaneh (half man, half woman) in Cheyenne, to name a few."  --  bipartisanreport.com
    Before European Christians Forced Gender Roles, Native Americans Acknowledged 5 Genders
  10. By Emanuella Grinberg, CNN | Updated 2:12 PM ET, Mon May 30, 2016
    "Chief of Police Brandon del Pozo said in a news release Sunday that the primary motivation for the attack appeared to be unrelated to Beede's gender identity but the department "has not ruled out the victim's transgender status as a possible additional motive." Police "will continue to view this homicide as a possible bias incident," he said."  -- cnn.com
    Vermont transgender man dies after attack
  11.  Johanna Li | May 26, 2016
    "Through drag, Jamie said she began exploring her own gender identity. Even though their mom, who is a lesbian, has asked many times whether Jamie thought she was transgender, it was not until she began speaking with her transgender friends more did she begin questioning it." -- yahoo.com/news
    Former Brothers Help Each Other in Their Transition to Becoming Sisters
  12. Pastor Writes To Dispel Embedded Misconceptions About Transgender People (Audio)
     
  13. Beth Greenfield, Senior Writer | May 17, 2016
    "While the details of the situation are disturbing — particularly in light of various transgender “bathroom bills” being debated in North Carolina and beyond — similar episodes are neither rare nor new for women seen as being on the male end of the gender spectrum. And Toms’ experience is shining a light on how such confrontations can affect women on the receiving end — as well as how the growing national frenzy around bathroom use is emboldening citizens, more than ever, to become restroom gender vigilantes."  -- yahoo.com
    Woman Harassed in Bathroom for Appearing Transgender — and She’s Not Alone
  14. This is from a longer video I did with me ranting about how disappointed I am with the lgbt and the direction they are going with some transgender issues here in the United States.  I feel this portion is good information for people to consider though. I trimmed off the rant at the beginning and the end, lol. I may sound exasperated at times through this so that's why. It had a longer context.
     
  15. My Personal Voice Changing Technique
     
     Some simple techniques for changing your voice if that is something you would like to do. This technique works for developing both male and female voices. In short SING! Sounds too easy right? Let me explain.
     
     When I was working in male mode I use to do a lot of speaking before large groups. I found people will pay attention more if you have a voice they want to hear so I trained my voice to be extremely deep and resonant. Like an old man singing Old Man River deep. Seriously, I became legend for my deep voice and the way I got it there was to sing. And yes I sang Old Man River but also Johnny Cash, Elvis, songs that had deep, resonant notes in it.
     
     When I lived full time in California for the three years one of the things that bothered me most was my voice. It’s a common comment I hear from many so I know that I’m not alone in that. This time around I knew that had to change since I refuse to go through life afraid to talk. I know some would like me to stop talking but that isn’t going to happen.
     
     I looked for tips on changing my voice and all I could find was either the absurd (“try talking like Mickey Mouse and then pulling it back”) or too ridiculously expensive lessons to buy. So I surmised that if singing could give my voice deep resonance then I should be able to train it the other way using the same technique.
     
     I chose one song, Foolish Games by Jewel, and sang it on a loop without stopping, every morning for two hours for a month and it moved my voice box to a place where I had a higher register that then translated into my natural speaking voice after time. In order to use this technique you HAVE to be committed to doing it. There is no here or thing with it. No “I’ll do it when I feel like it.” Every morning for twos hours, non-stop, without fail and you must PROJECT. Don’t strain but being timid in your singing won’t work.
     
     You’re going to sound like crap. Don’t let that throw you. Perseverance is needed in this and know that even after your voice starts to change in your singing the first few times through are a warm up, you will probably sound your best a few times in the middle and start to sound like crap again toward the end as your voice gets tired. Just expect it. The goal isn't to become a great singer. The goal is to develop a natural speaking voice you’re comfortable with so you can have the confidence you want while speaking.
     
     This will change your pitch and isn't a technique where you will be able to go back and forth between a higher and lower register unless you wish to take the time to train your voice box back. It’s semi permanent in nature but pitch is only half the story to a good speaking voice. Voice mannerisms should be learned as well.
     
     Men tend to speak in a monotone manner with little inflection and it is perfectly acceptable for a man to mumble. Women tend to enunciate their words and have a rise and fall throughout a sentence or thought. To help get some of that natural sing song inflection in your speech pattern I suggest trying to sound slightly excited when you speak. This will do three things. 1) It raises your pitch 2) You won't hold the same tone throughout an entire sentence or thought and will therefore give some natural inflection and 3) This will also create excitement for the person you are talking to and usually results in being responded to positively which is a great confidence booster in it self. Use it as an exercise when appropriate (or not so appropriate but maybe not when something sad is going on) and drop it back at some point if you like once you've gotten used to having inflection.
     
     For men, you’re trying to feel a rumble at the point where the neck meets the torso. When singing a song like Old Man River, after time, you should feel a resonant rumble in the low part of your throat when you go through the bass line of certain notes. It takes work to get there but that rumble, once achieved, will give you satisfaction in the feeling of it and you’ll want to feel that often.
     
     Smoking, as most people know, is very damaging when trying to attain a clear sounding voice. Remember Lucille Ball? Probably not...um..Remember the I Love Lucy lady? Think of her like way after I Love Lucy. She loved to smoke and her voice became awful.
     
     The last tip is keeping hydrated. Good hydration will make your voice sound it's best. Drinking alcohol will affect your hydration since alcohol is very dehydrating. Gargling with a little warm saltwater will smooth strained vocal cords and help relax them. Just don't swallow the saltwater. Seriously. Spit in out.
     Your voice may sound bad to you when you are nervous. I know I think that about mine. When I get nervous my throat constricts, affecting how I sound. When I can relax my voice sounds just as it should.
    I'm offering this as an example of my voice. I did the VA seminar in 2014 and the last half the beginning of 2016. Pitch isn't the important part of sounding female. Mannerism is what sells it. When on the phone, when people can't see me, I'm never confused for male and for me this is very helpful in many regards.
     
  16. This is one of my, what I call, Audio Blocks. I break Gender Dysphoria into three types and discuss each type so you can create a personal treatment plan and, with your psychologist's help, address and perhaps eliminate all your gender dysphoric issues. 
     
  17. J. Bryan Lowder | April 27 2016 2:07 PM
    "Indeed, as the Breitbart post so helpfully demonstrates, it is cisgender men who we should all be fearing in the loo—and, contra the gross fearmongering about “men in dresses” out to get “little girls,” this sampling of cases shows that real predators are fairly equal opportunity in terms of the gender of their victims."  --slate.com
    Breitbart Proves What We Already Knew: Trans Women Are Not Bathroom Predators
  18. Scott Gleeson, USA TODAY Sports 11:58 a.m. EDT April 27, 2016
    "“I feel like I need to be concerned for my well-being” in North Carolina, he said. “I’m not as concerned in the race. But I’m going to be in the state where I don’t feel a lot of love. There’s the hotel, a restaurant. Anything can happen. ..." --usatoday.com
    Transgender athlete Chris Mosier worries about competing in North Carolina
  19. by Zack Ford Apr 21, 2016 9:33 am
    "The candidate said his preference would be to “leave it the way it is,” seemingly intending to say “was” or simply referring to how things are elsewhere. “There have been very few complaints the way it is. People go; they use the bathroom that they feel is appropriate. There has been so little trouble.”"  --thinkprogress.org
    Trump Blasts North Carolina Law, Says Caitlyn Jenner Should Pee Where She Wants
  20. My Saturday, August 8th, 2015....Shopping with Isabelle...
    It seems that every time I go out I get a little more gutsy...  The first Friday of every month I attend a group meeting here in Gatineau with fellow MTF's and FTM's.  Since I already started buying a new female wardrobe, this Friday was the first time I would attend wearing my new clothes...nothing too obvious. I wore jeans, sneakers, a nice American Eagle tee with pink writing and a long beige cardigan...on the bus!  I don't really care what other people think and yes I did get a few strange looks but let's just say it blended well with the Guns N' Roses playing in my headphones lol!
    These meetings are awesome as they are a tremendous help with my dysphoria which is quite intense these days.  I have not yet started hormones but am getting a referral to an Endocrinologist from my GP this Wednesday as he has approved my letter from my psychologist.  I want to add I DO see a psychologist every two weeks and highly recommend this along with group meetings as the most important steps in self discovery.  If you cannot afford therapy, groups are usually free and the help found there is phenomenal!
    Now for the shopping... Isabelle and I went the this popular shopping center downtown Ottawa.  At first I wasn't sure what to buy but knew I wanted something more feminine than what I have so far which consists mostly of various tops and of course socks and underwear.  We went to Nordstrom (yikes! $$), Pink, Victoria's Secret and I still wasn't sure what to get.  Isabelle then had a really good suggestion...  Since my body is still quite masculine...at 6', I weigh in at 220 (lost 80 lbs since last October and still losing) and have typical male love handles, very little butt, man boobs from teenage gynecomastia, she suggested I buy a maxi dress that fits and take a couple of pictures.  We could then see the gradual effects of hormones by taking a picture wearing the same dress about once a month.  Then as I drop the weight even more, buy another "goal" dress which is a little more snug and so on..
    We went to a store called Sirens and with the fall clothes being out, there were very few XL size summer maxi dresses.  We then went to Forever21 and there I found the perfect dress for this little experiment...a long blue pattern summer maxi which fits very well length wise but of course I do not fill it in quite correctly in a couple of areas..  We got home and I immediately put it on!. Wow is it ever comfortable...I know now that dresses will take up a huge part of my future wardrobe and can't wait to start wearing them more and more.  
    My next purchase will be shoes and sandals and for this I will have to go to a tall girl store which we have in downtown Ottawa as I am probably around a size 13 wide in women's shoes.  In the meantime, I dress in my feminine clothes all the time when not at work and practice makeup every chance I get...I love that stuff!
    All the above is far from being a "cure all" for my level of dysphoria as my psychologist rates my transsexualism as pretty extreme and know I will have to undergo all surgeries (the "bottom" surgery is paid for by health insurance here in Canada), but is does help a little with my intense daily anxiety and along with the therapy and groups, keeps me from completely losing it until I start hormones and go further in my "oh so welcomed" transition.
    Now I'm on holidays for this week and the music is creeping back....
    Thanks for reading, 
    Roxanne
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  21. By Michaela Mendelsohn
    January 29 2016 6:41 AM EST
    "This makes my work with Trevor all the more poignant and important to me. I want the trans kids who are struggling for acceptance to know Trevor is there for them and make sure that we are there when they need us — like Michele had been there for me." -- advocate.com
    Meet the Trevor Project's First Trans Board Member
  22. By Daniel Reynolds
    January 13 2016 4:24 PM EST
    "“Our community got really small-minded when it decided to breakdown this very inclusionary ordinance to just who is using the restroom next to me and what sex they are,” Ghazi told Comer. “The sole focus became restrooms and locker rooms. This is such a bigger human rights issue than just who’s in the stall next to you. It’s none of your business.”"  --advocate.com
    Patrons Praise a Pizza Shop's Gender-Neutral Bathroom
  23. After a good day of relaxing and playing music, yesterday was our trans discussion group's monthly outing to a restaurant (my first time going).  I decided I would wear my favorite jeans, harley boots, a really cool long sleeve long dark green top and new dream catcher necklace I purchased at the same store as the top. I wore makeup, packed my money, phone and cards in my new wallet, a nice pink Michael Kors clutch with wrist band, and take the bus.  I had a one hour ride to downtown, a 14 minute wait and a short ride to my destination which was a decent Greek restaurant.
    This was my second time going out dressed and wearing makeup and since I'm not yet on HRT, I am not passable at all....and I don't really care.  The first ride was very uneventful and when I got downtown, I waited in a glass bus stop along with a very pretty and tall black woman.  Since this was right downtown Gatineau (across the river from Ottawa) and the area has a multitude of bars and night spots, there were a lot of people walking around and I was curious to see how many times I would be noticed and looked at twice.  Aside from a couple of people staring a bit and an elderly lady giving me the "evil eye" (I just smiled back!), it was a lot less eventful than I would have previously imagined.  The lady at the bus stop even sat beside me and complimented me on my nails which was really cool!
    I met my friends, a group of MTF's and FTM's and had a great meal and even better conversation.  After the meal, we decided to head to a new chocolate/ice cream place which recently opened and when we got there ...wow!  The place was packed with a lineup about 40 feet out the door.  We waited in line and it was really worth it...great ice cream of all kinds with a selection of about 12 different kinds of chocolate dips!  
    All 8 of us stood out on the patio and talked for at least an hour before heading back...it was awesome!  This was really my first time heading out into the "unknown" being my true self and it felt exhilarating! A couple of times I noticed some weird looks and stares but the feeling of being out as myself with people just like me and their friends out weighed any issue others might have with me...that belongs to THEM, not me!  A friend from the group gave me a ride home and I slept soooo well!
    This morning when I got up I had this crazy craving for steak and eggs!  I had the steak but not the eggs so I put on a pair of shorts, t-shirt and headed to the convenience store I've been going to for many years.  I still had on the nail polish as I usually keep it on during weekends and when I'm not working.  When I walked in I was curious to see if the cashier, who is a friendly woman in her 20's, would notice or say anything.  I got the eggs, went to pay and after waiting for the only other customer to finish paying, she noticed my nails and immediately said: "Oh wow, nice nails!!" to which I replied "thanks...I like the color and don't care what people think..".  She replied: "That's great, let your girl have some fun!"
    The steak and eggs tasted great....I think I'll have a good sleep again tonight...
    Roxanne
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  24. It's official --  obviously, as with most bullies, the WBC are a buncha cowards and don't like being done to, what they do unto others.
    WBC members had gone to Gladstone, MO, US, to protest the election of Landon Patterson as homecoming queen of a local high school.   What the WBC bunch didn't expect was for students, activists and CHURCH GROUPS to come together in support of the student with signs, and shouting louder than the WBC.
    It appears [by the vid below] that the WBC protestors never even got a chance to get out of their vehicle.  They were run off before they could spew their hate.
    Sources: Gay Star News
     
       Warning: Some language deemed offensive by some may/can be heard  in the video.
     
  25. Last Wednesday was a good day.  In the province of Quebec, even though medical services are covered by our provincial insurance, it is practically impossible to get a family doctor to follow us for any issue, problem or in my case, transition.  I have to thank my psychologist... about three months ago when she wrote my letter recommending HRT and eventual GRS, she sent a copy of these to a doctor whom she knew specialized in treating LGBT folks.  Well it didn't even take two days and to my surprise, the doctor's receptionist called me and scheduled an appointment for the August 12th and informed me the doctor would be taking me on as a new patient...I was floating with happiness!!
    So I went to my appointment last week and he proceeded to give me a full physical then proceeded to go over the letter from my psychologist with me.  He immediately followed up by sending me for blood work and renewed prescriptions I was previously taking, then again immediately sent a fax to an Endocrinologist in Montreal for HRT recommending he start me on it asap.  Two hours later I received a call from Montreal letting me know my appointment is set up for October 21st.  It's a little while away but ok since I'm learning we cannot be in a rush during this amazing journey called transition.  I have to say just knowing I'm finally going to start HRT has helped tremendously with my anxiety.
    I'm not shy to dress in public, mind you only casually as I haven't dared to publicly wear skirts or dresses yet but will go out wearing makeup and feminine tops.  So before going to the movies with my step daughter Isabelle last Saturday, we stopped at Winners and I ended up trying on 32 different feminine articles of clothing and ended up buying some tops, a nice black dress, maxi skirt, leggings, joggers, sleepwear and a few other things...  So now I'm wearing only female clothing when not working while at home and will start going out en femme more and more. I'm shy about wearing the skirts and dresses before HRT effects kick in but will eventually work up the courage to do it... I just wish I had more butt and boobs lol.
    Thanks for reading!
    Roxanne xoxo 
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