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Semi-Perminate "See ya"


WarrenG

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So, for various reasons, I've decided to take a semi-perminate break from blogging. I just have nothing positive going on in my life right now and I dont want every single blog post I put up to be negativity and venting. I'm just.....tired. Nothing I say is right anymore, and somehow I always seem to anger someone. Last night I was basically yelled at for my blog post being insensitive and rude and it severely made someone mad at me, and later it was brought to my attention that I swear way too much.

(Which is true, I wont lie. No hard feelings, I know I had WAY too many swears in there. It's cool, no worries.)

I was requested to take some swears out, which I totally would have done but I decided I didnt like the entire post so I got rid of itI just...need to take a break. I just dont feel that any of my blogs are productive or encouraging to the transgender community anymore.

Seems like any attempt I make to patch things up with people only make them more angry. My offer to forget about the release form thing for the book, out of nothing more than non-hostile or insulting manners, came off as rude and pig headed so now that person is all mad at me again. I just...I cant do anything right.

I bought new shoes and stuff for my brother because he didnt have any, but it made him upset that I was buying things for him. I bought a stuffed toy for someone who's sick to make them feel better, and got a lecture about spending money. I tried to make food for someone because they were hungry, and all they did was say it was disgusting and made them sick.

I'm just so sick of trying...

Maybe when...if....something good ever happens, I'll start writing again. For now, I think I'll just go back to my dark corner and stay quiet.

 

Stuck in a rut,

Ren

4 Comments


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ren, I wrote a fairly long response in support of your courage, directness, and self-awareness in your previous post, but I guess it disappeared when you deleted the post, apparently just as I was writing or submitting it.

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The thing about blogs is they don't have to be all sunshine and light.  Sometimes showing our pain, frustrations, and rage can be just as critical to let people know they are not alone struggling with these things.  When everything from others is all light and happy, and our lives are painful, it can be very isolating.  But seeing others with the struggles can give a sense of unity and strength.   Blog or don't blog according to your hearts needs.   We're all here to explore our personal truths and sometimes truth is a soft plushie, but sometimes it's a nine bladed knife.  

Edited by Briannah
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