SO....Nikki turns to me today and tells me that he's seriously job hunting in Dayton, has done research in the cost of living and it's lower and the salaries are the same as here so we can live better.   And he has a pocket ace in the hole, he's looking to move to the town that one of my closest friends lives in.  And apparently the child knew before me.  *headdesk*  After a lot of talk the current consensus is this is something Nikki is fairly serious about and we should actively work towards.  He did say check back in a month after his Zoloft takes effect again (the holidays are the worlds crappiest time to have to find a new doctor, that took FOREVER.)  But both his and my meds are now refilled.  And I have a new inhaler while I'm pocking at ancient carpet padding. 

On the plus side, I did see a $50k house that is near my friend, cute, and has an acceptable yard.  That is less than our current house, but a little bigger, adn lower mortgage. So this could be a really good thing financially as well as letting him find a job that he doesn't have to get up a o'dark of the morning.  There is more to do in Dayton.  It's a city vs. a large town.

And I'm completely freaking out.  Moving is the seventh circle of hell.  And I have a paralytic fear of real estate business.  I wanted to have a meltdown, but I kept my Bree calm and started researching what is involved in all of this.  Said close friend was called to explain to me how taxes work when you sell a home.  Because I have ZERO clue how that all works and it's something I should vaguely understand if we are potentially selling our house.  She's good though, she immediately new that while that was key information I was looking for, it was a cry to be saved again by my dear friend. And she gave me some links for Nikki to find a room to rent until I/we finish this place and sell it off, we think just a single room rental from someone is probably cheaper and more realistic financially until we sell this house. 

So renovations have not turned into potential sale prep.  I had a limited information talk with my mother, and arranged to start storing things in her basement. Whether we go or stay, I need to pack all non-essential things up so that we can work without tripping over things.  (Yes, this might have been prompted by me getting hit in the head with something that I knocked over while sorting books for the C-bus trip next week).  I just left out the possible fleeing town to start a new life elsewhere. 

I feel VERY unsettled and will until a decision is made to move or stay.  I can't just not worry about it, it's a Big Thing that is going to be on in my brain all the time until decisions are made and completed.  I feel both the possibilities for improvement and cringe at the sheer amount of logistics of making it actually happen. 

This all came outta left field, but just writing it out feels better.  Here's hoping for new things I guess.