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I know this is easier said than done...but to not go back could be exactly what some of them want. But I can surely understand not wanting to be where you're not wanted. I think you need to see if you and the other guy you mentioned in one of your posts (I think the one that doesn't attend those G/S Alliance meetings) can become good friends. At least you'd have each other to back each other. Maybe in time... others will seek you out. Intersex. Androgynous. Outlaws. Etc. They gotta be there, and if you all came together...it could be the beginning of a new and better group. Of course, some just might not want the exposure. One of the reasons is most likely exactly what you are experiencing right now. -Michael