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She's really gone

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So, today I just watched my wife drive off. She's gone and I'm here at my mother's house. I was offered the chance to come back home so many times if I just do not change. It was very tempting but I know for sure that i'll just be depressed and ready to end myself if I keep living a fake life. 

People keep telling me how this choice that I'm making is effecting everyone. Basically I'm the cause of everyone's in this situation. I understand that need a scapegoat for their pain but all I'm doing is being me. Most people get to do that with out getting a finger pointed at them. 

I'm very thankful for all my supportive friends and some of the family that have been supportive too. This is going to be a positive change for me and I don't want to let others drag me down into the goo. 


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Posted

Dear Winter,

I'm so sorry to hear this from you and I'm not surprised to hear you're feeling depressed. I think what you are experiencing is what we all fear: rejection, loneliness, despair, and all that self-questioning: am I doing the right thing? How crazy am I? 

Well, you're not. No, I don't know you at all of course. But being TG isn't a "choice" the way that others would see it. It is what it is. And if you're on the Transgender Train I think it's best to get started and ride it out, to whatever stop(s) you decide to get off at. 

In the meantime may I suggest that you keep on blogging, let us know how you're doing, and allow us to give whatever support we can.

Hugs,

Emma

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Posted

Thank you for being so supportive , Emma. I am a little down right now but I'm going to try and focus on being positive.

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Posted

Winter,

So sorry to hear your pain, Emma is right in that transitioning isn't a lifestyle choice, others really need to realise that fact. Stay in touch, I hope that youget to where you want to be, so sorry I can't offer any other positive advice other than to agree with Emma.

Hope your pain subsides soon,

 

Eve

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Posted

Winter,

Sadly, this is an example of conditional love . . . which really isn't love at all.  

Monica

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