Ups and Downs

I've also had several people tell me how brave or courageous I am for coming out, and for being, transgender. And as you say it's wonderful to keep those people in mind especially when we have down feelings or worries or are criticized. 

Why shouldn't we just be happy and live accordingly? We should but each of has his/her own personal responsibilities, inner demons, and social considerations that they need to try to balance and come to terms with. Like myself, I endured for more than a half century to confront and understand myself and to slowly push the boundaries toward transition. In the US (and, it seems, in some European places) younger people are growing up with more open-minded parents, and are thus coming out and being themselves earlier and more naturally. And, they also have puberty-delaying drugs that enable them and their parents to mature into having a more confident decision about which gender they really are. 

So, the answer? There isn't a single answer. As all people, transgender or cisgender, are different, each person's situation is unique and their own.

Dear Charlotte and Emma,

There have been some situations where people AT FIRST supported a transgendered person, but then changed their mind (probably under pressure from their family and friends).

This has also happened to me as a Lesbian.

Yours truly,

Monica

That's happened to me too with being androgynous and with intersex disclosure. Sometimes it involves pressure from family or friends, but sometimes through their own insecurity about what their family or friends will think about them. They fear that their gender status or general social status will be questioned or compromised. A girlfriend that was particularly drawn to my female aspects loved that we could be secret lesbians except to close friends that we knew would accept us. She had been occasionally attracted to other women but was too afraid about what others would think to become sexually involved with them.