Hello everyone, my name is Emily. A long time ago I was born a man. A short time ago I started discovering that I may have gender dysphoria, and really would prefer to be a woman. It's both terrible and wonderful at the same time. Terrible, because of very strong feelings of guilt: what am I putting my family through?! And wonderful, because it totally explains how I've felt and thought my whole life. I've always thought that I fancy women's things, because I fancy women. That makes some sort of sense, right? I guess I was wrong and was just fooling myself.

But what I want to find out is: what do I do now?

Last October I came out to my wife. She's been wonderful and supportive, and is fine with me cross-dressing, it that makes me happy. But what if this becomes a permanent thing? Or if it goes even farther and I choose or need hormone replacement therapy, surgery, etc.? All of it is exciting, confusing, and terrifying. But at least since October I've been able to express myself freely at home, and those hours have been nothing short of euphoria. One fun thing is that I'm the homemaker of the family, as I quit my job to stay home for the kids. So you can probably imagine me singing and dancing while cleaning the house. I can't deny though that the poopy diapers are still a bit less euphoric.

I think this will be enough for the first post in my blog. I don't want to put too much into one post. Blurting out all my thoughts could probably fill several books. I'll keep posting with things that are on my mind that I need to talk about. Things in my past, or things that are going on that day.

Yours with love,

Emily