You go, Karen, but we knew that!

Hi Karen,

Horrible thoughts, yes I had those, still get them at times but not about completion, more about oh my "God what am I doing" or "oh my God what have I done, I'll be an outcast / freak for the rest of my life, this is not reversible....." Strangely enough they occur whilst lying awake in bed.

But I never give in to those thoughts, I have not appeared as male for over 3 months now, and I really do enjoy being "full-time" trans female. Thanks for the warnings about dilation, I have of course heard them from my friends over here, and I still can't wait to rid myself of my 'junk'.

Please keep your blogs coming.

Kind Regards,

Eve

Karen

"Now here is something I found interesting, she believes that transitioning is one of the most difficult paths a human take embark on. As we know many want to but do not because of monetary issues or physiological issues. Then there are some who manage to have GRS (Gender Reassignment Surgery) but in one way or another end up a failure which in some cases leads to death. I am fortunate to have many people help me along the way and it help that I had the mindset and the motivation to take the right path on my journey of life."

Thank you for that very concise point. It begs I ask the question. maybe two First, are there or can there be people who are just "girly" between the ears, and can they muddle through the maelstrom of life and pass behind the veil with a smile on they're face? Second, and I beg pardon if my terminology is a little primitive. If I had a nice rack installed, what if that was the only thing that I FELT I needed to get me where I want to be? (I am working on my fitness. My waist matches what it was in my Junior year of High School and I weigh less ! Just got to condition my junk ! ) Does that make any sense?

Again, thanks for helping me pick that out of the background of transition stuff that is churning around my brain. Your blog is fascinating.

Veronica.

Veronica,

I'm I may step in here... hopefully not barging in! I had some of this discussion with my gender therapist just last week. Here are her answers:

1. Absolutely, it's quite possible that a TG person will be perfectly content staying "in" their birth sex. She didn't have exact figures/percentages, but it's at least 50/50 that are happy without hormones or SRS. And some are happy only taking hormones, even if they could otherwise afford and medically handle SRS.

2. I suppose it depends if your breasts are the result of hormones (perhaps assisted with breast implants) or are only due to implants. The therapist reminded me of a transwoman in our support group who is only on hormones, lives full time as a woman, and that's where she's perfectly happy.

My 2c,

Emma

I love it when there are discussions like this :-)

I'd add that I have said many times to my friends thaty being Trans is a hell of a lot more difficult than than being Lesbian, Bi or Gay, even if you don't take hormones or have breasts or don't want GRS, you have to live with two different identities. I found this to be ever increasingly difficult, you also look completely different from your CIS self, and others can notice it and make nasty comments etc.

OK after a while on hormones your features do change to be more femme (or male as the case might be), but then you have to do something about beard growth (electrolysis in my case, and it hurts), also your voice needs to be different to your cis voice. You also need to acquire the confidence to be able to present in your Trans gender everyday, not just now and again, but every day and still be capable of doing nearly all of the things that you did in your cis gender, the list goes on and on.

Some of us have a head start over others of us, when their cis gender and build is closely matched to their trans gender, (I had to really work at it, and it's still ongoing)..........

So yes I agree with Karens doctor, it is in my opinion one of the hardest things that I could have done.

Cheers

Eve