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Dear Warren, Thanks, and I mean this, for your writing. Your fears, worries, and all, are real and valid. Don't let anyone tell you they're not. And yeah, getting started with a therapist is weird and awkward. No one wants to do it. We all just want to be happy. But therapists can definitely help. They're not all of them great, but you won't know until you invest the time and open your heart to them. It's risky and it takes time to build the necessary trust, too. I think it's wonderful you're going to see someone and I wish you the very best. And I'm sorry to hear you cut yourself again. Here's a book that may (or may not, I don't know): All That Is Red. Check it out on Amazon. By Anna Caltibiano. It's fiction and it's about cutting, but more metaphorically. It might help give you thoughts or perspective. Take care, Emma

What's up dude! Totally got you on this one. Its like "I'm lying to people...but am I lying? This is who I am. Wait dont tell them!!" I struggle with that every day too bro. Especially at work. Keep your chin up, we'll get through it :] I'm glad your girlfriend is super supportive. As long as you've got at least one person to help you out, you dont have to hold the world on your shoulders. Hit me up if you ever need to talk. And for star sake, abuse that blog button! Helps a ton Warren

I've had my fair share of nervous smiles, glares, stares, frowns, and gasps of exasperation or indignation. I've endured the indiscernible twitterings of which I am the topic, obvious by the unapproving sideways glances in my direction. I've watched some step back in horror as we meet in the doorway. It's clear in that fleeting moment that they believe one of us is entering or leaving the wrong place. I love those incidents... funnier than hell... I came out of a multi-stall bathroom once (I was the only one in there at the time), only to find a woman waiting outside. She briefly made eye contact then breezed past me and into the bathroom as I cleared the doorway. Interaction between this woman, her companion and the wait staff indicated she was a regular, so she knew the bathroom had several stalls, and the main door did not have a lock on it. So I wondered, why was she waiting for me to come out of the bathroom before she went in? Quite often, the bathroom is the last stop before I walk out my door in hopes that I will not have to pee again before returning home. I look for single-use restrooms. If there are none, I note the times when the bathrooms appear to be less likely crammed with women, and I will go to a stall that is as far back as possible. Or I will go to a bathroom that is somewhat out of the way - the ones that no one wants to walk so far to. When travelling alone... because my STP is "always ready," I usually just find an out of the way place to pull over, and water the grass.

Hi Warren This got to me man. I hit all three of those in one day and once I'm in that funk it last for days. Like you I work out till I'm dead but sometimes I think for what. No one sees me how I want unless my girlfriend has "the talk" with them. I'm to embarrassed by the though of telling someone that thinks I'm a girl to tell them that I'm a guy. Or I lie and say what I'm no girl and just shrug it off. It's hard most of the time. just grin and bare it I guess. I think one day we all will be what we want but we will be better people for all the crap we had to go through. Good luck to you

Thank you Emma. I have been reading his and its like everything I think and feel. Its nice knowing theres people who care and are going through the same thing.

Hey Kerig, Welcome to TG Guide. I'll bet you'll like it here. I sure do, and there's a lot of info and great people here. I'm glad to see that you started a blog, Check out Warren's! I think it helps a lot to write about what you (and we) are going through. This is a great and safe place to do it. And please add your comments and thoughts to other postings, too. We'd love to hear from you. Best, Emma