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Hi guys, Blair here again for another blog update, Today I want to talk about how I voiced my first ever thoughts of doing what I'm doing today and how the people I told reacted. Mostly this was my family first that is why is titled "coming out to my family" Before I decided to voice any thoughts to my family I decided to At least say these things out loud to a friend. Luckily I had a friend who is somewhat new in my life but really is the type of friend I needed to be able to be silly... about who I am or how I act. Even before I voiced any thoughts about my journey I remember wanting to get my nails done for the first time, her response was nothing out the ordinary, and like it wasn't fake it was as if to her that it was completely natural and there was no questions asked. It truly made me feel at comfortable with who I am and what I wanted to do to express myself, she also helped me learn a valuable lessons that I shouldn't have to "expect" people to react a certain way or put myself down to tell them things, like if I wanted to paint my nails pink they why ... shouldn't I? And if I think I look fabulous in them why shouldn't I shout that. Why should I downplay that to make others feel more comfortable with it? Anyways back on topic ahaha So I told her and basically voicing it for the first time to someone else really shows how ready you are for what you want to do and how comfortable you are telling people. So for me it was a perfect tester before telling my family. I only describe how amazing my friend is because that is the type of friend, teacher, councilor who you want to tell as it makes you feel completely at ease with who you are. It certainly will give you a idea of how ready you are and really give you the confidence you need to take the next step. So I then told my mother.. Oh wow I can still taste the emotion while writing this as when I was telling her that day. Her response was typical responses that I had read online. She said things like "why are you taking away something from me", "everyone will disown win you", "who put you onto this crap". Quite frankly some really hurtful things as from anybody you want your mother to hold your hand and say everything is going to be okay. I guess that really prepared me and gave me my armor to combat any negative comments that I would soon face. Over time and just recently after showing her my overwhelming amount of support and hearing her own friends say how beautiful I was, was she able to really embrace it. Now in this short span of a couple months is she now not only "okay" with it, but also embraces it and loves me even more deeply. Quick shout out to my mum. I love you so much xxxxx Anyways again, BACK ON TOPIC I then decided to tell my father and 2 sisters. That is basically my immediate family they had the same reaction as my mother but we're even more a little bit hostile with it. They were not blunt about their concerns for me and did not really think about what they were saying so it Didn’t hurt or discourage me. I kind of felt that like the entire coming out to my family was me making sure there okay instead of them making sure I'm okay in "my" journey. Funny how that works out. But that's how it worked out and it took quite some time but now like my mother in a short amount of time is embracing it. I also would not change any moment of it as it really prepared me for the next steps in my coming out. Family also means a lot to me so I spent a lot of time concealing them to make sure that there emotions were fine. If you’re this type of person, don't stress to much. Don't forget to focus on you!! To give a little context to my family they are the normal typical outdoor backyard cricket type of Aussie family. My thoughts of telling them and then being accepting and understanding, let alone embracing it, where never what I thought could be possible. I guess that just shows how you really can tell your family anything. So if your scared about coming out to your family, just think of how I went about it and how they reacted and just know that it does get better and soon enough especially with hopeful support from friends and school, that everyone around you will not only accept you but embrace you. To summarize, the message in this blog update that I'm trying to get across (probably failing) is that, I have a normal day family who I thought in my wildest dreams would never accept me, turned around in a short period of time and ended up embracing me and celebrating me. If your scared and fearful of rejection and all those crazy thoughts going on in your head about coming out just know that it's not impossible and your family may just surprise you. It is so worth it. Again if you have any questions please feel free to comment or message me. Also if you ever want to talk or get advice, I am here. That's why I do this. I would love to write more I don't want to loose concentration, as this message is important. Hopefully someone has taken something out of this. Thanks for reading xoxoxo

HI guys, i forgot to add a video link for the VLOG update i did with a connection to the piece i posted. So here it is and i hope you all like. Like i said please share, like and subscribe with all your friends! stay strong xx https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4H_39LDcvQ

The day every two weeks I dread, washing my hair and straightening because my hair is naturally curly. First blow dry then hot iron which takes about an hour to an hour and a half, here I go.

Wow, just about ten months since my reassignment surgery. In no special order somethings I have noticed. Yes I admit this, have gained 20LB since December when I was weighed last. My doctor said it's the hormones. So without hesitation I started running for 45 minutes each day and completely cut out anything one would consider food that encourages weight gain. The nice thing (if there is any) is that the weight is evenly distributed because if nothing else I still fit into my clothes and only really feel it slightly in my legs. My goal over the next six months is to lose not only the 20LB but another 10LB. A nice thought, while getting my nails done this week one of the girls there said I rocked it with my outfit last time I was in. I admitted to her about my weight gain and she said you look fine for your height and would not worry about your weight sigh, give that girl a hug.Last year at this time I would always put on jeans or leggings for the weekend day but now have changed to tights and shirts, for me at least they are much easier to do when I am lazy. Speaking lazy, I mentioned this before but will again, after work and not planning to go out I disrobe and go about my business in my underwear, something as a male I would never dream of.My emotions were never all over the place like I hear from some who are transitioning or have transitioned, still waiting for it but has not happened. Perhaps (and thinking what my doctor said two years ago) it's because I mastered to some degree my emotions be it good or bad or it's how I was made and raised. Sure I get emotional from time to time and sometimes can not control them but that is once in a blue moon. This morning I was watching a movie and yes the tears came rolling down my face so yes the hormones are surely working.Genital stuff, not much going on inside my vagina but boy or boy is there a lot going on with my clit, there are times when I can't keep my hand off it and times when a partner will take advantage of me while pleasuring me. Marci Bower's assistant told me that don't expect much going on inside and that it takes 10 to 12 months to see. So I believe I have enough there, could had more but heck I am happy as a clam with what I got woohoo.I never have to think about things like "is my voice okay" or "does my attire suit someone of my age". Speaking of age I am 59 and passing for 45-50 which is great.I decided that even though my voice is acceptable voice lessons are going to be done starting in a few weeks. There is a good deal going on in that department to pass with tone and resonance plus a tad more. I am fortunate to have found someone close by that has experience with male to female clients.Still not into wearing makeup but do love a nice perfume. Yes permanent cosmetics for eyeliner and brows was one of the best decisions I have made.More electrolysis, I am so done with shaving underarms so I am having them done.Passing and being made, distant fleeting words. Over the past year or so nobody has given me a look like "male or female".Have not lost any friends over the past few months and actually had two co-workers who did not talk to me for around four months now making conversation with me with them starting it "What".I am sure there are things I am missing, sure hit the publish button and they will come screaming out, go figure. So there you have it, spilling out the good and bad, it's good to get things out into the open if not for peace of mind but to let others know and if it happens to you it's okay but please don't hold it inside as it will only hurt thinking about bad things. Now off to do my daily run and day dream about an attractive female I am having fun with recently and questionable thought about a new male friend on Facebook.