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Hi Moe, Aha, I'm glad to see you started a blog. In a prior TGG incarnation one would have a notification on the home screen showing what had been recently updated and now that that feature is absent I don't think to navigate over the blogs very often. As a young child around 4 or 5 I knew I wished I was a girl. In nursery school I remember wanting to learn how to curtsey with the girls instead of shaking hands with the boys. Every night as I fell asleep I'd pray or fantasize about being a girl, what that would be like. In elementary school I feared it was all about a habit that I needed to shake off. But I couldn't, of course. In HS and college I did start acquiring a small collection, mostly of underwear and tights. Then I thought I had some sort of "sick fetish" which was I'd heard about others having sexual fantasies. That then was my darkest secret. Honestly, I'd never even heard of the term 'transgender' until almost ten years ago when I started trying to figure myself out while in the care of a great therapist. I certainly liked that word much more than 'transvestite' which sounded negative to me, and, somehow I knew it wasn't all about the clothes. In my career I also travelled a lot, often to Asia, Europe, and Israel. Like you, I snuck small clothing items in my suitcase, mostly to wear at night. Emma

I'm 79 and just starting my journey that I may not complete. Good for you to find your own self!

"Reminds me of the Lumberjack Song!" YEAH!!! I think you were pretty courageous to wear women's underwear while hunting. I know I'd be fearful of having some kind of emergency or failure of my clothing and then being found out. And, I never wore a bra beneath a shirt or anything out in public. Too much chance of someone noticing the telltale bumps of straps!

"I've had a love hate relationship with my penis. Sure it felt good while masterbating or having intercourse, but it always was the cause of problems. Relationships to me were always penis centric and the women came (no pun) last. " Me too. I was always so embarrassed about how it would get hard and show through my pants. Throughout my life I wondered how anyone could become so sure that they wouldn't regret having it removed in gender confirmation surgery. That is, until four and a half years ago when I had that realization. I had my surgery almost exactly four years ago and I've never missed it. I love the way my clothes fit down there! I think I'm now starting to understand the desire for orchiectomy. Maybe it's like GCS without as much pain, recovery, and hassle.