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Sometimes people make me sad.

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So I got the new webcame to skype and roll20 game with my son now that he's moved, and I Thought, ya know what?  I wanna say hello to the world.  Omegle, here I come!  So I loaded it up.  Now, I FULLY expected to run into a lot of pervyness.  I went into it with the realization I will see things, there is no way around that, the next button is my friend.  But I had it in my head that there were other normal people who just wanted to talk to the world, and after I waded through the unspeakable things, I would find and chat with interesting people.  But it seems like the ENTIRE thing was unspeakable things. 

And it makes me really sad.

Random video chat is a lifechanging technology.  It has the power to connect people around the world, to talk, meet, share their lives and stories, educate each other about different places of the world, and learn the truths in the world for yourself through contact instead of media.  And we've let it languish into some sort of perverts only waste.  We could change the world here, and we just...don't.  I wouldn't even mind wading through the random body parts and weirdness if it meant there would be gems of awesome somewhere.  I"m an adult, I can push the next button and not be irreparably harmed.  But there was nothing no matter how many times I nexted.   If you are under 18, stay off these things, even the ones rated 13+ the users really don't care.


So my webcam sits off quietly, until someone I know someday might also get a webcam other than my son.  And I'm still lonely at night hwen it's quiet, and I could have spent that time broadening my understanding of the world, and I think I"M a little mad at the world for not being there.  To tell me why Togo is an awesome place, why I need to fight pollution to try to save the Maldives from vanishing because they have this awesome thing, what this custom I don't understand is all about, or to answer any question they have about american weirdness.  Lonely turtle.


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Posted

I had not heard of random video chat but it makes sense now that I think of it. But, you wrote, "And we've let it languish into some sort of perverts only waste.  We could change the world here, and we just...don't."

I don't mean to put too fine a point on things but I don't see "us" (whomever that is, not me) having allowed it to languish. I think the basic problem is that there are a lot of people out there who get their jollies doing things like you described as well as promulgate fake news, run phishing and other scams, and promote hateful views, among many other things. It's tough to filter those people out. We do it here on TGG pretty well, I think, but it's all manual, not automatic or algorithmic, which is what larger sites such as FB, Twitter, and others must have. 

Also, who is "we" my friend? I don't think it's you or me, or any other member here in TGG. I suppose you mean "the human race?" Back to my earlier comment that somehow this filtering needs to be done automatically and I'm confident that a lot of smart people are focusing on that problem now. After all, most folks at Google, FB, Twitter, et al, aren't in love with Trump and it's reasonable to say that the fake news had a part in his election. 

Stay tuned. Perhaps we'll see random video connection services for people who have been pre-screened for common interests. Hmmm. Idea for a new company? 

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I do mean the human race.  We is everyone who would use it for normal purposes both social and news/information spreading, but abandoned it to what it is now.  It didn't used to be like this at the start, I'm told from people back in the day who used things like Chatroullette and Omegle that i used to just be conversations, people reaching out trade news of the regions, or just bored people who wanted to meet ohters, but we as a global community let it fall to the wayside.  People who don't use a thing for good things, who just say "it's full of garbage, I'm not going there!" and leave it to be exactly that.  And yes, it is tough to filter them out, but we are supposed to be a world that doesn't shy away from things because they are hard.  And at the end of the day, that next button makes them vanish.  No, I don't mean anyone in particular on this site, I mean the whole internet population.  We as a whole.  All the normal people who don't get on it and have normal conversations.  I'm still scrolling through things I can't mention here becuase I'm not ready to give up on meeting even just ONE person out there who I can have a conversation with (That Turkish dude's body language seemed normal, so while I admit he could have been saying extremely kinky things in Turkish, I would be sorta surprised).  B

ut I picked mysefl back up and slogged through some crazy again, and almost had a conversation.  Some man in Micronesia and I were doing really good (or horribly gone wrong) pantomimes.  It was weirdly fun.  He was trying to explain how to prepare a fish I believe, as he kept turning his camera to the food he was working on while he was talking, and I was showing him pictures of my area.  Language barrier again, but ti was still...cool. 

I think what makes me really sad is that we COULD reclaim it, if the army of people across the world with webcams got on, just nexted the gross and ignored them, without reinforcement and with just ordinary chatter boring them it could be reclaimed.  And I think with so many governments going crazy, it's probably important that it we do take it back and start talking to people beyond our normal daily run ins.  *shrugs*  but I"m just one turtle, I'm not really the revolutionary type no matter how hard I Try to be.

 

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Dear Bree and Emma,

Just happens today (Sunday, February 19th), I worked with my compact digital camera to attempt to take some still photographs of myself, and they came out horribly.  (This is for a Lesbian Internet dating website).  Also, they wanted a five minute video of me, speaking of my likes and dislikes in a partner, and I didn't even go there!

Have no trouble writing to women who have no picture, as I care about the woman's heart and character.  The only thing about looks that might bother me is when a woman is overly obese (she is 200 or more pounds heavier than me) or she doesn't care for herself (unkempt).

Both of you are among my favorite people here.  Am grateful to have Internet friends, but I have to have face to face friends, too.  Unfortunately, I live in a small city where people generally are slow to become friends but are quick to hate.

Am going to the Fantasia Gender Conference in the hope of making good friends, and if I am lucky, meeting the love of my life.  Will be honest with you, I prefer transwomen or cisgender women who are trans allies to cisgender women.

Yours,

Monica

 

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Aww thank you! :)  As a let live and like everyone liberal girl trapped in conservative hell, it's always nice when someone actually likes me. :)  Sometimes I wonder how makes people so happy to be mean to other people, and then I flee to the internet and am all like "Oh yeah, there are still nice people in the world who want to be nice to other people!  YAY!"  LOL

I'm mulling over an epiphany I had today on some of it, from an article about where the safe space hatred comes from in the so-called 'alt-right', and it's one of those enlightening moments.  I"m just not sure what to do with it.

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Dear Bree,

In my small town, I have had been verbally attacked in a RESTAURANT when my brother and his wife took me out to dinner at a higher end restaurant to celebrate my birthday a year ago.  He was accompanied by his family.  Would have called him on it, except I was accompanied by my Straight homophobic family.

A month ago, when a Lesbian friend and I went to a diner, I had a man "stare me down," and I gently but firmly called him on it.  He was accompanied by three women.

Frankly, both of these ***holes were cowards as they apparently needed the "support" of their family and friends to insult me.  This never happened to me before, and I believe it is directly related to today's political climate.

Didn't know either of these men from Adam.  Personally, if I were in their party, that behavior would be a "deal breaker" for any continued friendship or dating! 

Yours,

Monica

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It's a deal breaker in my friendships too, I back away from any serious racism, religionism, sexism, whateverism because I think what matters is how individuals behave.  I don't care who anyone else sleeps with as long as proper consent is contained (I do care if people are being molested or raped!), I don't care what religion anyone practices so long as it doesn't harm anyone (don't get me started on the weird religions need to punsih people who don't share the same one), I don't care where people came from, I don't care what they wear, eat, like, whatever.  None of that has anything to do with me.  What has to do with me is can we converse nicely, do they treat me and others around us well, are they likeable, what do we have in common, things like that. 

I have a everyone welcome whose not a jerk sign hanging over my friendzone!  :)  Before Nikki and I decided to switch from Polyarmory to Monogamy, my dating sign was "everyone welcome whose not a jerk, but I make no promises til we see how it goes" sign over my datingzone. :)  Even when I ran into things dates were into that I could not personally handle participating, I never had a need to make them feel bad or weird about it, I just said I'm sorry, this isn't my thing, but I wish you luck finding someone who enjoys this too. 

People say I'm weird that I"m still friends with several people I'd had romantic/sexual relationships with in the past.  I think I'm fairly normal, if you like a person for being that person, not just their looks, it doesn't seem that strange to stay friendly as long as there was no reason not to, like cheating or abuse or something harmful.  Nikki is friends with them and genuinely likes them.  Not my ex husband of course, that falls under the abuse clause, but others.  People tell us that's unnatural too, and I wonder where this "if we can't be in a romantic relationship we can't be anything' comes from.  Or where the 'you must erase all traces of exes to prove you love the person you currently choose to be with' idealogy comes from either.  Are we as a culture in America that insecure?

I will never understand why anyone would choose to attack you for choosing to have relationships with whomever you are attracted to.  They are not in the relationship, they are not harmed by the relationship, and it has nothing to do with their reltaionship with you, they are forcing it into a place it doesnt' belong.  People make me sad more and more these days.

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