I'm glad I make your world okay the way you right mine when it's all spiraling around me and I can't handle it.  And I'm glad you like the boobs.  I'm a little weirded out yeah, they aren't what I was expecting, which was something more like...silicone and soft and the plastic on the outside confuses me texturally and if it's a shipping thing or an actual casing.  But I'm getting used to it and willing to keep poking at it.    So be my kitten on days you need to, and days you just want to, and be my dinosaur on days you need to, and days you just want to.  I'm good with this.  We're good together. 

But um....at some point I'm going to stop feeling like this thing you got me for my bra issues is going to stop feeling like a piece of meat stuffed in my bra yeah?  Because that is weirding me out big time. 

Depression sucks, Nikki, I know it well.  I'd expected that coming out as TG would resolve it all but found that like so many things it's like peeling back the onion.  There's more stuff inside.  The good news for me is that at least the outer layers are, finally (after goodness, more than fifty five years!), peeled back.  Take care of yourself, wade in, and allow it all to wash over you slowly and at your own pace.  There is no rush.

Bree, I fully understand your feelings about bras and breast forms.  Why not?  I can't really imagine what it's like for you of course, but then again, I think I do.  Like Nikki, take it easy and at YOUR own pace.  You're fully involved with your own feelings which are also perfectly valid.  It's so beautiful and admirable about how you're both growing together.

Warm hugs,

Emma

Emma, I think I'm actually weirded out worse by the evener he put on me.  It feels really like I put a piece of meat in a biggie on.    

Our doctor was impressed at how much effort I put into reading what the counselor we picked is experienced in, but I know I'm horrifically complicated, and I needed a doctor who understood a wide variety, and Nikki is a lot like me.  I actually was kept on by my therapist who usually worked with just teens into my early twenties when I moved here because she was actually helping me and didn't want to risk setting me back by switching me to a different doctor.  I can't make Nikki well, but I can try to find him the tools he needs to get well himself and help him try to find that health again and support him on the bad days and the good days that will come. 

Just like he does for me.

kittennikki (i kind of like nikkikitten, too), it's getting late, but just wanted to say how great it is to hear both your experiences with each other and the dialog between the two of you.