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Moving On


MichelleLea

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It's been one year since my wife died--yesterday to be exact. It has certainly been a year of adjustment for me. I have had to deal with loss for sure, but it has also allowed me to come out and express myself and to be more honest about who and what I am. That has been very liberating, and the friends I have made on this site have been there with me with their sage advice and wisdom. It is much appreciated. Now today, I have made another big step in listing my house for sale. Initially, I had been hoping to keep it a while longer, but unfortunately, my income from AFLAC has not been enough to meet my expenses, and I need to downsize. Frankly,  I don't need this big a house--not that it's that big--but it has a fair size yard, and all my free time seems to be spent maintaining it. I still have a little left in savings, and I want to get out while I still have a cushion. I plan to rent a mobile home locally for a while to see how that goes and how I like it. I can move anywhere now, but would kind of like to stay in Florida. Anyway, I'll keep writing about the experience--I have a lot of stuff to get rid of for starters.

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Hi Michelle,

Sorry to hear that your AFLAC work is paying off so slowly for you. I'm sure your supervisors just love your work ethic, perseverance, and attitude. I suggest taking a step back and try to objectively consider what's going on, why you're not making more money, enjoying more success. 

It's unfortunate to have to say this, but it's quite possible that your manager(s) are already very aware of how small a chance it is for anyone to make a living in your role. They may very well see you as quite unique, who, if anyone can, ought to be successful. Let's face it, it's hard to find good people like you. 

The situation reminds me peripherally of companies like Uber where sure, you can quickly become a driver but unless you consciously and adequately stash funds away for car maintenance you'll soon not be able to earn anything when your car breaks down. 

So, by objectively looking at your current situation at AFLAC you may decide that despite your best efforts your territory just doesn't have prospects with sufficient interest to make the insurance investment. Or, you might think of another plan of attack to approach prospects. (For example, about 35 years ago I was responsible for selling a $250K piece of manufacturing equipment, and was having a heck of a time getting customers to appreciate the benefits they'd accrue from using it. My manager and I came up with a compelling way to get meetings with CEOs and presidents: we'd set our watch on the table and ask them to give us 60 seconds of their attention. We then presented a simple (but credible) economic analysis of the benefits and, lo and behold, that turned the corner for me, and I sold about a dozen machines!)

About renting the mobile home: excellent idea, especially to rent. I lived in a smallish Class C RV for about six months last year and in the end didn't care for it. I'd purchased it for what I thought was a very good price and assumed that, like a car, I could resell it later with some relatively minor depreciation. Au contraire! I ended up losing a fourth of what I paid for it only one year later. Live and learn, no?

Best wishes,

Emma

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Thanks as always for your comments. I am a hotshot at making appointments, but like we've discussed a while back, it's the quality of the appointments that make a difference. I am spending more time up front to make sure we have some quality. It's been hard to get the employees to buy in when they have to pay for it themselves. My coordinator and I are working to make sure I have better enrollment conditions and more chance to actually sell policies. I've done it before; I can do it again. In the meanwhile, I have been gradually assuming the role of Coordinator-in-Training, and we'll probably make it official in the next month. Since I'm already training new recruits, I might as well get paid for it. I'll keep you posted on how my move goes. I'm starting to purge--what a job! Hard to know what to keep, but If I haven't used it or worn it for a long time, it should probably go.

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Dear MichelleLea,

Agree with Emma's advice, but I suggest renting for two years, as it takes about two years to get used to the heat and humidity of Florida (nine months a year), and it's distinct (transitory) culture.

May I recommend exploring the Tampa Bay (Clearwater, St. Petersburg and Tampa) area, as they have many excellent transgender support groups, associated with the King of Peace MCC Church in St. Petersburg, Florida. Please visit their T/LGB Center, located in Gulfport, just south of St. Petersburg, and they will give you excellent information on the above.

Please consider looking for a T/LGB community. Have known some manufactured home (mobile home) communities to have very cruel residents, especially (God forgive me, especially when I am one, myself), when they are senior citizens. Also, I have found some manufactured home communities to be drug-ridden. 

Sadly, Florida has a big drug problem. 

Google "Tampa Bay Hotline," and e-mail them, and, if possible, call them, and ask for recommendations.

MichelleLea, there are good people everywhere, you just have to look for them. There are some TGGuide members who hail from Florida, and ask them for their advice, and what their likes and dislikes (pros and cons) about living in Florida.

Your friend,

Monica

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This has become my go-to place for help and advice to navigate through this thing called life--I suppose that was what this site was designed to do for folk such as we are. I did look at one mobile home park today while out working. It was pretty nice actually--well kept and quiet and orderly. The sales lady was also very nice.  No rentals at this point and only one for sale--a 3/2 1040 sq ft home for 64,900. It looked like what would work for me and my two toy poodles. Since I'm still pretty discreet in my dressing, it could work for the time being while I continue to work locally. Eventually, it would be great to be in a more friendly LGBT community, so the Tampa Bay area is not out of the question. I'm just getting started, so we'll see how she goes. BTW, I opened another account today, and it looks like this one will fly. It was a confidence booster and made me feel good that I haven't lost my touch. Later. Hugs.

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Congrats on opening another account! And also for recognizing your not focusing enough on winning biz at the ones you made appointments with. Don’t succumb to just being busy. Focus, focus, focus, on winning biz. Anything else is, sorry to say, spinning your wheels and wasting energy and time and money. Why money? Because the time spent on the accounts that don’t pay off is time you can use on opening up others.

Please also take Monica’s advice on Florida. And only rent a mobile home! $70K is a lot of money, especially for a used mobile home. Maybe you can find something on Craig’s List?

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9 hours ago, Emma said:

Congrats on opening another account! And also for recognizing your not focusing enough on winning biz at the ones you made appointments with. Don’t succumb to just being busy. Focus, focus, focus, on winning biz. Anything else is, sorry to say, spinning your wheels and wasting energy and time and money. Why money? Because the time spent on the accounts that don’t pay off is time you can use on opening up others.

I was thinking about you overnight (which happens when I write just before going to sleep!) and hope this helps. You should be congratulated more for your ability to make appointments. People are busy and don’t want meetings just because you’re nice. I conclude that you must therefore be tickling their curiosity enough to set up the meeting. But then, something goes haywire. Maybe they have objections you can’t address. Too expensive? Not really needed? 

It’s lucky that you have a long experience because I wonder if you could go through your past meetings and in one or two words classify what went wrong with each one: why didn’t they buy. Then, tally these up to determine the frequency of each. Then, take a look and see if you can create a better response to each one. Be creative! Be radical! It doesn’t hurt since now, when you hit one of these objections you almost certainly lose the deal. 

Turn it into a game and see if you can get some more runs on the board!

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I need to get better at picking up buying signals and running with them. With the two recent accounts I just opened, I did just that right on the spot. I'm not as fast on my feet as I should be at times. You're right to make it more of a game and have fun with it. I can relate to people, so I'll just keep practising.

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