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Busted?


Emma

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As usual, this morning I was reading the New York Times online edition on the computer in my home office – a very interesting article titled “The Ride of Their Lives” with the following opening paragraph:

“NO FAMILY DOMINATES a rodeo event the way the Wrights do saddle bronc. But rodeo is a young man's game, which is why the family patriarch works to grow his cattle herd. Rodeo and ranching may be vestiges of the Old West, yet the combination is one family's hope for future generations.”

So there I was, reading the article, browsing the fantastic photos, and reading the caption to the photo shown here (a young cowboy crashed out from a hard day’s rodeo) when my wife walked in to say goodbye for the day.

“What’s that?” she asked.

“Oh, nothing, just an interesting article in the New York Times.” I scrolled around a bit to show her some of the other photos. We proceeded to say our farewells and I went about my recent efforts on her business’s tax preparations.

About an hour later, I receive this text message: “I was upset this morning in your office seeing your email. I would like to talk to you about it tonight.”

I couldn’t imagine what email she was referring to, and replied, “Which email was that?”

No response. Uh oh.

I wracked my brain, looked over the few emails that I had written and responded to, nothing looked particularly unusual. Then it dawned on me: the New York Times photo of the cowboy! Oh crap, once again, she’s terrified I’m GAY!

Although I assure you, my Maker, my therapists, and my wife, that I am 100% heterosexual (and I really don’t care if one is or isn’t, I just am), she has been worried about this ever since I came out to her about my being transgender. Once again I have to enter Damage Control and undo what her worried mind is conjuring up.

I printed out the front page of the NYT showing the article in question prominently displayed in the top center and rode my bike the 10+ miles to her shop, to show her the real source of the article as well as my sincere disclaimer about being gay.

I think it all went fine except I should not have mentioned that I also enjoyed "Brokeback Mountain" for its cinema-photography, soundtrack, and heart-wrenching story. (Which I did, not for the gay-ness just because it was a terrific film.)

I’ll know more in about three hours. Suffice it to provide this Important Safety Tip: Be darned careful what you are looking at on your computer when your SO is around! Yeah, something else to tattoo on my forearm.

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Emma,

Beautiful photography! Wanted to be a cowgirl growing up . . . jealous of the kids that grew up on farms! My back ACHES looking at those pictures!

Wish your wife could look at the ENTIRE article before passing judgement . . .

Monica

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Hi Eve,

Thanks for asking. Yes, I think it went fine overall, but it was amazing how worried she really is about the possibility of my being gay. I think that stems from two things:

1. It's hard to dismiss the assumption that one who is transgender or crossdresses is gay.

2. If I am gay then she worries that I will eventually leave our marriage.

I offered to show her the NYT article on my computer but she didn't want to. She asked me to provide a summary off the top of my head, which I suspect was a way to test how much I had read the article versus just looking at the photos (of which she's only seen the one).

I assured her again that she has nothing to worry about but she got pretty teary saying that she had been very worried in the morning. Poor thing, she's really on edge these days.

Emma

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