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"You know that look on someones face when you say you have bad news and that curling of the nose as they listen to something they need to do? That was his response. Kind of like "Ugh....this again....Dont like it."" --Warren That doesn't sound good. Even though you've mentioned the two of you have about your true identity before, maybe it's time to do it again. And maybe this time, you could ask your b/f to consider couples counselling. At this point, I don't see him taking this seriously. It almost sounds as if he thinks this will go away. After a while, his indifference and dismissal of your true self could cause you to begin to resent his attitude, and eventually resent him. -Michael

Warren, Check out this: http://www.avitale.com She has lots of info and links to other sites that may help you. Emma

Hi Warren, I've wondered a lot about this too, and I'm glad you brought it up. Of course, I only have my own guesses for the differences in numbers between MTF and FTM. Here's a couple of ideas: The word "transgender" is very broad and covers a wide range of MTF/FTM gender expression, up to and including HRT/surgery. It seems to me that transmen are allowed and accepted so much more by society that they aren't even counted in the transgender statistics. On the other hand, it might also be that there are even larger pressures on transmen than transwomen to not identify as transgender at all, thus also suppressing the statistics. I don't know or have much of a sense for this of course. About finding medical and therapeutic resources for FTM people, I can imagine that's very frustrating. Perhaps Michael or others here will be able to help. I sure hope so. Sincerely, Emma

Warren, I think it's great that you had a sit down and talk with your BF. I'm afraid there is no other way if you and he hope to grow in your relationship. And from your experience with a trial separation it seems that you both do want to stay together. So keep talking! I know what you mean about being self-conscious. I think that comes from the doubts we have about our partners true acceptance. In a perfect world we'd be so self confident that it wouldn't matter what he thinks or says, but that's not the world we live in. You are already displaying a lot of courage to be yourself and now, understandably, you're looking for support. Perhaps in one of your talks with him, ask him more about what's going on for him. What support and affirmation does he need? Maybe by supporting him some of his urges to comment on your longer hair or old clothes will diminish. I hope so for your sake. Be well, Emma

Unfortunatly we've had a sit down and talked about this together. We even attempted to break up and go seperate ways, but that only lasted a few days and we were together again. He insists that he's fine with it, that he's willing to cope and adapt, and that he's not going anywhere. He tells me all the time that it's fine if I want to change and that he's not going anywhere because of it. Yet...he does that. And that's not the first time. Saying I looked better with long hair, looking at my liscence with my long hair and saying that picture is better, saying he misses my old clothes, etc. I've become self concious around him and wear my boxers to bed, and he's even caught me wearing my compression shirts to bed. Love him to pieces, but I'm not sure what to do. -Warren

Sorry to see that. Well I think the only answer I can give Men just forget unless its about them. Plus they want to be in control. Well hope it gets better Maggie

I agree that the two of you need to sit down and really talk about your relationship and each one's identity. I don't know if "couples counselling" would help or not. Thing is... I get the impression your b/f is not gay, and probably not even " While we often hear of wives who remain with their MTF spouses even though those wives are not lesbian, or even bisexual for that matter, I think it might be a bit rare for straight males to remain with their FTM partners. Work on the relationship. Get help if possible. But you should also be prepared for the relationship to end if your b/f can't see himself in a relationship with man. -Michael

Hey Warren, I'm glad you had such a nice time with your sister and sorry those feelings went down the crapper with your boyfriend. That just sucks, especially after having such a great day, with your being recognized as a male. Sounds to me like you need to have a heart-to-heart adult-to-adult conversation with your boyfriend (after you're both calm) about your feelings, and see how he reacts and what he says. It's painful to go through these things but we all do with our partners. After, you'll have a sense of whether or not you see yourself staying with him and no matter what, you can say to yourself that you did the right thing. I hope you take this as friendly advice from a friend, that's all it is. I may be reading the situation all wrong, which would be no surprise. Good luck, Emma

Everyday passes I feel more comfortable in my transformed gender yet confident but I don't think surgery is required. I am working to develop to keep both genders yet switching back & forth. But currently working on how to live for 150 years as cds' r & ways to extend ones physical life ! On YouTube check Shazy Jeo channel

I am an avid fan of your blog sister

Hi Lori! I just signed up, but I alredy have a newish blog about my journey... http://girlinternal.blogspot.com.au

I found this site at just the right time! I have started a blog and I hope you enjoy it. I am just starting out on my transformation, so I need lots of advice and support, and hopefully you will find my blog as a source of support, as well. AmberG.

omh this sounds so exciting I wanna say yes, but I need to be sure I can be 100% commited, ok?

What do you do if you already have a blog? http://www.finallyfemale.com

It's only the begining for me but i'm really excited in bringing out the girl in me )

Great ideas...I will prob write everyday life from an SO....and our dual life. ( her choice not mine) Right now I am going through lots of STUFF but will come back to this.( Blog)