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I want to dance like nobody is watching but yet know that they are. I want to raise my fist to the sky scream and curse fall to my knees and ask forgiveness as I forgive. I want to live to the fullest extent of my being, laugh until I cry, love with all that my heart can endure. I have to be free and allow myself to be. To except my true self and love my true self enough to let my true self live. I no longer can cower in the shadows of my learned behavior but must climb out of the shelter and stand up.

The following link is my blog entry for post surgery with Marci which includes dilation. http://karenpayneblog.com/2015/02/02/post-operation-appointment/ What I did not post there is peeing after the pee bag was removed. First thing, did a decent spray (not really something to be proud of) both times. I was told this may happen so I was well positioned for this event.

Dear Karen, Unfortunately, women spray. That is why I hate it when a woman does not take the time to put paper down on the toilet seat and sit on it when she urinates. The ones that hover over the toilet seat, leaving a mess on the seat and floor for the next woman to clean up irkes me! LOL!!

Hi, If any girls from the UK are listening or should that read reading? Anyway please get in touch. Not that I don't want to hear from anybody from anywhere else too. Eve