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I am not surprised at all but you did the right thing and are in short trail-blazing the path for others. I lived with this for a long time when living as a female with my bank accounts in my male name. Of course after a year on hormone replacement treatment I simply could not hide it anymore and went to the bank manager, told him about me. After telling the bank manager I got even better service i.e. when I came in for anything and he was there or his assistant (a female) would call me over to their desk asking how they could help. Once my name officially changed the congratulated me and took care of changing all accounts to my new female name. Many are under the assumption that one must wait until after gender reassignment surgery to change their name and gender on documents but with the right therapist (like mine) they can write a letter stating it is okay for you to change name and gender. I did this one month prior to surgery which was her recommendation so that travelling would be easier. As it was nobody question me but was grateful that my ticket had a female name on it. So if ready, consider looking into changing your name and gender.

The ignorant people who slag off trans people are just sheep, lazy, mindless and flock together because everyone else does, and are incapable of thinking for themselves, perhaps the only thoughts in their heads are it's always been this way and so it must be right, and anyway everyone else thinks the same. They need to wake up and realise that the world is changing..............fast in civilised countries. Process for name / title, and acquired gender in the UK is anyone can have as many names as they want, that being said it doesn't satisfy many organisations, a statement of name change is a free document in the web but again doesn't satisfy all, the easiest sure way of doing it is to get a UK Deed Poll Service Deed of Change of Name and Title (Deed Poll). Acquired Gender Change can then happen with a doctors letter (stating that you are undergoing gender identity dysphoria treatment and are likely to remain as female for the foreseeable future), and certified copy or original Deed Poll, appropriate fees, and forms filled in be sent to Passport Office and Driving Licence centre for new documents, They will come back stating that you are female.

Social condition plays a huge part in this which causes us to conform to social norms whether we want to or not as I see it.

Yes Karen, you are correct and also it was your blog entry that confirmed my earlier thoughts during my insomnia at 04:30 GMT this morning. Exactly the same regarding Femme wardobe LoL. Never wear the same outfits on two days running when in the office.................. You may be right about times taken to reach decisions, but I can only guage myself against the girls that I know, of course there are ging to be many many more that I don't know. I also suspect that differeing cultures, national and religious, will have an effect on time taken. Yes I did do the questions and thinking about one if not the biggest decision of my life, but perhaps not in such a separated manner, more like small steps at a time with small decisions before each. But I always new that it was what I really wanted, I just didn't think it possible, social conditioning I suppose. Thanks Karen, Eve

Overall it sounds like time spent in the mist, coming out of the mist is appropriate time spent to make informed decisions on yourself. You know it may be wrong to say it took longer than others dependent on whom you are gauging yourself against as I am sure there are more than you realize that took an extended period of time to make their decision too. Thinking of clothing and makeup cost, from my perspective it's all about wearing something different each day where as a male the mindset is I will wear the same thing day after day in regards to pants and shoes and even with shirts as men are more that way while females are the complete opposite. I have a huge closet, for years as a male it was half full but as a female it has overflowed to another closet.

Yes, it's you for the rest of your life, how do you want to spend your life, think about it.

Ya know... here's something that some of these ignorant, inconsiderate people should consider -- I worked with a guy who's LEGAL name was an obviously female name. His mother did not read or write very well, and she spelled the name she wanted to give her son the best she could. Just turned out that her misspelling was not only a real name, that name was spelled correctly, and it was a name for a girl. On the flip side of that coin, I met a woman who's father had wanted a boy so bad, that she ended up bestowed with the name her father had chosen for his son before she was born. Apparently, his word was rule and her mum had no say in the matter even though the much wanted son ended up being a girl. I have no idea how often these things happen, but it's proof that we are not the only ones that don't always have the gendered name that people expect us to have. Unless there is reason to believe there is illegal activity occurring, people need to learn how to respect people, and stop taking it upon themselves to try "educate" a person about his/her name. Anywhoooooooooo, years ago, I ran across something online where a lawyer somewhere had pretty much destroyed the traditional stand by courts to deny a person a change to a name that did not match their gender - I wished I had saved it. But no matter, to the best of my knowledge, no court can any longer deny a person a change to the name of their choice as long as the reason is not for any illegal purpose. Warren has recently legally changed his name and he has not begun any medical transition. You might want to check out three of his blogs about his name change (if you haven't already seen them). Perhaps he will even share with you the steps he took. Process may be a little different where you live, but the information might still be helpful. Frustrated but hopeful Chaos has Swallowed me whole MISSION SUCCESSFUL!!!

I should add to my entry that I do consider my appointment with the doctor to be a very preliminary step. I've done a lot of research on it, but I'd like to hear what a doctor says directly, and also perhaps do the preliminary blood work to make sure it's even possible (I don't see any reason why it wouldn't, but who knows).

On a side note on prostate, after gender reassignment surgery the prostate goes into atrophy in about 12 months post surgery.

Just a quick update - I just made an appointment with the endocrinologist on June 20 - yay!!!!!!!!!! (I was a little frustrated that it's so far off, then I realized it's only 3 weeks)

Winter, Sadly, this is an example of conditional love . . . which really isn't love at all. Monica

Winter, So sorry to hear your pain, Emma is right in that transitioning isn't a lifestyle choice, others really need to realise that fact. Stay in touch, I hope that youget to where you want to be, so sorry I can't offer any other positive advice other than to agree with Emma. Hope your pain subsides soon, Eve

I'm so happy things are coming together for you! Best wishes on that email to your sister!

​Hey UO, I have lost a considerable amount of weight (250lbs down to 180) since 2008, I should be happy with my progress, but I have been stuck for 3 years of actively trying. My best advice to you, is just to cut back one thing at a time, repeat. For me, it was potatoes, and I could eat a plateful alone. Within 2 months, I cut down to 2 big tablespoon dollops. If you do it slowly, your body doesn't really recognize that you're eating less. At a buffet, I can barely eat 3 plates (in fact, I can barely eat 2, but I want my money's worth, so I force it!) I'm not going to preach, but if you (or if you're just reading this) want to know more how I did it, and timelines, hit me up.

​Emma, I swore I replied to you yesterday! Basically, yes, I have completely overhauled what I consume, and cut a lot of bad things out that I ate 10 years ago. Almost mirroring your comment. That is why I find it so frustrating at not seeing any results! Either way, keep talking and I'll keep listening.

Well Christie, that's brilliant, and shows that generally US medical thinking seems to in advance of the UK, except for my GP of course, who is a wonderful woman who also prescribed me oestrogen way before the normal protocols state. I did try quarters but they seem to crumble after cutting them in half, Finasteride is also much more effective when combined with testosterone blockers, in my case Decapeptyl. I hope to be able to dispense with wigs within the next 12 -18 months. Catch you later..........Eve

Thanks for moving it Christie, I don't know how I managed to mess up the entry, apologies to all. Eve x

Emma, There would actually be something of a loop for me to write about dealing with my fears and doubts since so much of it is reading other people's blogs here Eve, Finasteride I think is fairly commonly prescribed here for both prostate problems and hair loss. My dr prescribed the 5 mg version, saying that he does that and then people cut them in half or quarters, it's cheaper that way.

Fantastic Christie, I'm so glad it's going so well for you, and that Finasteride doesn't seem as much of a problem as it can be with some GP Doctors over here. Funny coincidence is that my Electrologist is also a transwoman, not that you'd ever suspect it. Have a great week-end, look forward to hearing more progress from you soon. Eve x oops oxo!

Hi Christie, It also sounds to me like you've got a tremendous support system. And you're part of that too, of course. I like it that you're putting one foot in front of the other without rushing. Yes, HRT sounds like it's in your near term future. Thank goodness you have such a wonderful therapist and MD to talk to. I think it would be especially interesting to read about how you deal with your fears and doubts as you move toward and possibly into HRT. I know I would love to hear about that. hugs, Emma

[I originally posted this under the duplicate entry of this blog post, wanted to move it over here ] Eve, I'm so glad you shared this! I've felt very similar to you about this, and it's what fuels what remains of my doubts. I especially like that you talked about testosterone ravaging your body! I remember when I started to have body hair it truly grossed me out (honestly, even writing that phrase right now made me feel a little ill). I've worked very hard to get rid of most of it (waxing, then laser, now electrolysis for my face). It wasn't until I started cross-dressing a couple of years ago (thinking at first that it was a fetish) that I started to realize who I really am inside, and that my outside wasn't matching. xoxo Christie

Hi Barbara, I'm new here too and exploring the site. I'm surprised (and a bit dismayed, frankly) that I see that almost three hundred have viewed your posting but you have not received any replies. You have a nice photo and I hope you're well up there in NY state. Probably starting to get cold there, no? I'm out in the SF Bay Area and it's getting a bit chilly here, but probably much milder overall. Be well, Barbara, and enjoy. You're a good person. Best, Emma

Hi RichLisa, I'm a little younger than you but not so much that it matters, so I think I can understand where you're coming from. I agree, too, that it seems late, and I often wonder where I'd be today (perhaps lots happier?) if I had taken MTF steps a few decades ago. But I didn't, and here I am today. My suggestion? Go find a therapist that you can connect with. They're not all the same, so talk to a few and see what you can find. And then, share your story with him/her, and see what turns up for you. I'll leave you with another story that you might find interesting. A 55 year old woman was talking to a friend. She said, "I've always wanted to become a lawyer, but shoot, if I started college today I wouldn't be one until my early 60s." Her friend counseled, "So, when you're 60 you can either be a lawyer or not; the choice is up to you." And then the woman saw that it was indeed her choice, and started applying to schools. I'm not saying you should start hormones, plan on surgeries, or anything. I'm just saying (and saying it to myself as well) that we owe it to ourselves to take each day as it comes and be ourselves. We all deserve love, respect, and acceptance. Best, Emma

I would love to start hormones but I am afraid of what a doctor would say.I am thinking of herbs.I am 49 and been wanting breasts for years.

HMU @ queenkevin01@live.com if you want a friend to talk to. Kurt

Andrew....I like what you had to say in your rant to teachers. I am also FTM. 8th grade. Read what you said about ACE wraps. They are dangerous. My Mom just got me a binder. Kurt

Yes. Same thing happening to me right now. I'm 64. I would go on hormones right now if it wasn't for what it would do to my wife. If you can do it ... I'm just saying I would.