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I was coming home from the grocery store and thought "I have not been to the toy store recently, think I will stop in for a few minutes". So I walk in, young female sales person greets me "HI how are you doing today", I replied "Great", next comes "if there are any questions or if you want something opened let me know". I said, just browsing, nothing in particular. So I first go to the female toys, about two minutes go by and she comes over and said what do you think of this? She has what looks like a normal dildo but then said "hold on to it and shake it". Well I was not expecting what happened next. I said my favorite toy was, pointed to it. She says, I see you have a high end taste. I came back and said, sure makes traffic jams more pleasant. (note, there are no other customers in the store). She walks away with the interesting toy, I move down and start to check out the strap on equipment, I look up and she is about four feet from me so I said, which one do you like? No hesitation, she pointed out the one she uses and we get into a discussion over other ones. Must have pulled out four of them and LOL we are both pulling them up over our jeans, mind you both of us are standing in the backend of the store with strap-ons having a discussion and a male customer walks in. She say "Want to play", customer "Jaw drops",. me, I turn around and we kiss. Male customer, "oh my". So she takes off the toy and calmly walks up to him and said "what can I do for you today", male customer "I am lost, after seeing what you two did I completely forgot what I came in for. I walk up to the door and said to her, "was nice meeting you", she, "same here, winks her eye", him while looking at her, "you don't know her?", her, now I do. So did I leave empty handed, all depends on one's perspective.

As the saying goes, "As one transitions, those around them transition as well." I am reminded of this fairly frequently, but more-so this week. My mom and sister have been struggling with my transition. My mother and sister still live in the Northwest Ohio area. I told them of my transition and being transgender at different times. I came out to my sister back in April 2014. I came out to my mom later that year. I have struggled with my gender identity my whole life. My mom was vaguely aware of this struggle in my early years. Eventually, I was put in therapy when I was 14 years old to address what was going on with me. My parents really did not know why I was dressing and going out in public. They thought I was acting out. That I was engaging in risky behavior. But they did not understand or know what it was. I did not know what it was either. After a year or so of therapy, my therapy ended and was considered "successful". Successful in helping me repress my true gender identity and successful in fooling everyone that I was "normal". Whatever "normal" is. So fast forward 30 years. My father passed away a year and a half ago. My mom is struggling with his death and all of the ramifications of that. And she is struggling with my transition. Not just coming to terms with it. But also trying to understand how this could happen. Naturally as a concerned parent, she is looking back trying to understand how she missed this. She is also trying to fill in her history with the story of my experience. This past week, she has struggled with the coming "death" of my male gender and what that means to her. Getting used to having a new daughter and no longer a son. Does she call me by my female name? Or my male name? I told her to call me whatever she felt comfortable calling me. That it was okay and natural and that she needed time to get used to this. My hope is that eventually it will be difficult to call me her son. But I understand that to her, I am her only boy. She was concerned that I would demand that she refer to me as a daughter and that it was going to take her time getting used to it. I told her that as long as someone's intentions were not malicious that I wouldn't be upset if someone misgendered me or forgot to call me by my female name. My sister is having the same difficulty with having a sister versus brother. The sense of loss is very real. Even though I am the same person, in this very bigendered world, we wrap our identities in our gender roles. Those around us interact based on how we present ourselves and are perceived. This is more-so the case in a close knit family. And when we no longer act or present in a way that represents our gender roles since birth, this is considered an act of rebellion, an affront to "normal" people who consider this "abnormal". How people deal with this, depends partly on them and their relationship with me. Regardless, my expectations are the same. I expect to be treated with respect and expect to be accepted without understanding. My word taken at face value. Yet, I will cut everyone some slack. My transition will take time for people to adjust to. Some more than others. I have been struggling with my gender identity for 40 years. If it takes people some time to adjust and get used to it, not having that experience, it is totally understandable. Everyone take care. I hope that everyone has had a wonderful week. Love, Lisa

On Sunday with the assistance of my partner and friends, all of whom are ex SCUBA divers, we put on a snorkelling 'taster session' at one of the swimming pools in Birmingham. This happened at a private session hired from the City Council leisure dept, by Birmingham LGBT under the name of Moseley Shoals. Moseley is a suburb of Birmingham for those of you who don't know, and Moseley Shoals have been in place for quite a while. It only costs £4 a session to swim, after the first session which is free, and it's open to anyone who identifies as LGBT. I had offered to do snorkelling for them, with a possibility of continuing on to SCUBA later, the offer was very gratefully accepted. The group are very friendly and obviously open minded, and many of them tried ot snorkelling for the first time, along with some of my trans friends. The session was greeted with enthusiasm, and it turned out to be very successful. I've been asked to repeat the session next Sunday, and then to do fortnightly lessons. Birmingham LGBT have an aim of involving more LGBT people in sport, as well as raising general awareness of the needs of LGBT people in the Birmingham area. Cheers, Eve

Sounds like a lot of fun! I've also scuba dived, in Mexico, California, and Hawaii, as well as snorkeling of course. Always a blast but be sure to tell them to wear a t-shirt when outside snorkeling or risk a nasty sunburn on the back! Hugs, Emma

Eve, let me say I found it humorous and spontaneous myself, especially when the customer walked in, wish I had a picture of this lol.

Thanks for this Karen, it's really hilarious, what a marvellously spontaneous occurrence.

Dear Lisa, In your photos and writing I see and hear a sweet woman, who is considerate and kind, patient and yet steadfast. Thank you for this, your most recent post. All aspects of being TG and letting others know is hard. Harder than it should be, I think. After all we are the same people at our core that we were. So if they loved us before and now learn how deeply we need to express this side of ourselves, why oh why is it such a trauma for them? I suppose part is a worry that we will hurt ourselves either physically or in spirit. And, of course, there is a concern about how our gender will affect others feelings. Sounds to me like you're handling it very well. You're a beautiful example for all of us. Hugs, Emma

Don't think I've given up on the training that we spoke of last year, softly softly catchee monkey, I'm getting in with Birmingham LGBT myself instead of relying on others. I have something to post in the next day or so, so you'll see how I'm doing this........