Kristila95

Some of my guy friends are surprised when I tell them that I talk about sex with my mother. I definitely agree that mothers and daughters talk more freely about it. My mother is my best friend too:)))

I think it's so nice that you and your wife are working so hard on your relationship and that she is working to understand and accept your gender identity. She must be an amazing woman:) Happy for you:)))

I kind of thought the same as Veronica. It's kind of cute pic, but nothing very sexy. I hope you are able to reassure her fears about it:)

Have a fun shopping trip:)

Jennilee, I am now very cautious about what pictures I post on like facebook and other social sites. I used to have a pic of my sister and I in matching Easter dresses when we were little. I thought it was a perfectly innocent and cute picture, but I got some of the creepiest comments from men that I've ever seen, even from a few guys that I thought were really nice. I also stopped posting full body pictures in dresses when a couple ended up on tumblr "she-male" sites. It's a shame that we can't post pictures that other girls would without weird comments or drawing unwanted attention.

Thank you usernameoptional, I haven't had that so far on this site and it's great:)))

Monica, I mean skipping "the talk" by meeting guys that already know that I'm transgender so I won't have to go through it. Like through friends, or guys that know me from the tran-advocacy events that I do sometimes on campus, etc. I have met and dated guys that way and it was so nice not to know that I have to have that awkward discussion. Unfortunately, I haven't met anyone that way lately.

I've tried a couple of the transgender dating sites and spent a lot of time describing myself, what I like and what I'm looking for. It was like the guys that contacted me didn't even bother to read my profile.. I put 20-25 years old for an age range, but like 90% of the men that i heard from were over 40 and many were in their 60's. I also get the impression that a lot of them thing that because I'm trans, that I'm desperate or something. I just want an easier way to meet guys that know upfront. It would be nice to skip the "talk."

Hey Lisa:)

Sorry to hear that things have gotten to you today. I had one of those days not too long ago and wrote a long blog entry about it. It's definitely good to get it out. Some people just try to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad. The ones that get really mean have the biggest issues. I had one guy reply to a comment I made on youtube, telling me that he hopes that I will die soon. The sex creeps just seem to be everywhere online. That's the reason I've deleted most of my accounts on transgender social sites. You can limit who can send you messages and friend requests on Facebook, but there's no way to stop all of the unwelcome requests.

There's a lot of support out there though, try to focus on friends and our amazing community when it gets bad.

Just remember to kill them with a smile:)

It's like Taylor Swift says:

Cause the players gonna play, play, play

And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate

Baby I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake

Shake it off, shake it off:)))

Also Lisa, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.

Feel better soon!

Kristi

So happy that you have supportive friends:) It makes all the difference in the world. Stay strong!

Hi Warren, I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties with your family. Support is so important and so many don't get enough from the people in their lives that matter most. I hope that you won't give up on your family, sometimes acceptance and support take time. On the bright side, I'm happy for you that work is going well.

KML

Thank you Emma:) I do know of Brynn Tannenhill and saw her speech. I think it was called "I Am Real." It was so inspiring and helped reinforce my attitude about facing critics with understanding, patience and education. I remember one things she said, "If you wrestle with pigs, you get dirty and the pigs like it."

She sounds amazing Emma. It sounds like you found a good therapist. Good luck:)

I don't know where you're from, but there are often LGBT centers in big cities that can help you. These places are probably the best places to look for therapists that have experience with GID. You can search for transgender resources for you area. I'm glad that you have someone that you can talk to in person too.

How long was it before the first two weren't as uncomfortable Karen?

Stay strong, you are almost there:)

Great post Emma:) I liked the 6 steps too. They should be memorized and repeated everyday!

Have you considered counseling? Possibly through an LGBT center in your area? I've heard from a lot of people that are feeling the same as you are now. You are far from alone. Unfortunately, the stigma of being transgender or even somewhere along the spectrum, makes people afraid to talk about it and leads to feelings of isolation. Writing about what you are going through can be therapeutic too:) There really is a lot of support out there.

Keep us posted and good luck:)

KML

I agree Karen. I have tried many other sites, social, forums, chat rooms, etc. I never felt like I fit in on any of them them. Rarely were actual issues and experiences discussed, it was usually small talk or people asking if you want to snap chat. TGGuide is different.

Karen, I'm not surprised that you got many hits from guys. You are a beautiful women. I am curious if you have ever felt like you have been fetishized by a woman. I would think that it's possible, but not as likely as with men.

Thank you for your input:)

KM

Thank you so much Monica:))) I will check that out and will never give up.

<3

KM

I think that being transgender is how you feel inside, your mind, heart and soul. People can express their femininity outward to what ever extent they choose, or not at all.

Jennifer, this is an interesting topic.

I don't know how much you've looked into this or have practiced. You may know more about it than I do. I've read that everyone's voice can deepen somewhat as they age, so it is something that I am concerned about and I try to do voice exercises as much as possible. Some of the exercises are fun too...like singing:) I noticed that there are links to voice training articles and videos here on TGGuide. If you are interested, I could also share links to some of my favorites videos also.

So, just in case you haven't yet taken the step to voice feminization, here are some of the basics as I know them. There are a lot of ways to feminize the voice, pitch is just one part of it. There are many things that together make a voice sound believably feminine...resonance, tone, etc. Woman also have a beautiful kind of singing voice quality and vary pitch and emphasis more within words from syllable to syllable. Basically, women talk more in their mouth and head than their throat or chest. They even move their mouths differently while speaking. I've read that it is easier for the deaf to read women's lips than men's because of this.

As for seeing the opposite gender in the mirror, does that mean everyone, or transgenders? I can say that there is truth to that, at least for me. I can't say though if it was just me subconsciously focusing on characteristics that are feminine and ignoring anything that might be considered masculine or something else. Maybe I am just seeing how I want to be seen, or the way that I feel inside.

Wow, that is good advise!

Lisa, thank you for sharing this. It does sound like you are dealing with a lot right now. Have you looked into resources specifically for transitioning in your area as far as counseling, therapy, support,etc? I don't know much about your therapist, but is the person experienced with people thinking about transitioning or who have begun the journey? In my city there is an amazing center that offers all types of things from counseling, doctor referrals to legal. Maybe there is one in your area too. In the end, the only thing that matters is that you are happy. I don't want to come off as "preachy," but there is no reason to rush into transition. People transition at all stages of life. I recently read an article by a therapist who was counseling a woman who transitioned at 70+ yrs, so it will be there when you are ready. I want to wish you the best with whatever decision you make and for you to know that there is a lot of love and support out there.

KM<3

Thank you Karen. I hope to hear more from you about your post srs experiences:)

KM