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AllyT2018

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Blog Comments posted by AllyT2018

  1. Jessica,
     

    Thank you for posting this topic. It speaks to something that I have been thinking about a lot. I appreciate your courage to share your feelings so openly. I think you are also on the right track about keeping an open mind.

    Although I am still in the early stages of transitioning, I have been in the LGBTQ community for sometime. For decades, I told people I was gay man, though it never felt right. One important turning point for me was when I was filling a questionnaire prior to taking an HIV test at the LGTBQ Center in San Diego. The questionnaire asked about sexual history and identify as well as gender. I put down my gender identity as female and my sexual orientation as straight.  I can't describe how right this felt. When I handed it to the counselor I cried. It was such a cathartic moment.

    Since that time, I gradually involved myself in the trans community -- through the San Diego LGTBQ Center and a bar frequented by transwomen (the SRO). For what it's worth, I have found that there are many people whose sexuality and gender identity are fluid.

    This is just a long way of saying that I would not discount Cis women as not being potential partners. I have continually been pleasantly surprised in meeting CIS partners of transpeople in many different combinations -- including MTF and Cis women.  I have met the following pairs:

    • MTF & FTM
    • FTM & Lesbian identified CIS woman
    • FTM & straight CIS woman
    • MTF & MTF identified as bisexuals
    • MTF & straight-identified CIS man

    For myself, as I said, I want to date a CIS man. I am not sure if I ever will have bottom surgery. (I am tabling that issue for now.) However, I am sure that I would expect my male partner to consider me a female even in bed. I know that some people would call that relationship gay, but I really only think it matters to us.

    In any case, just sharing some thoughts.

    Thank you again.

     

    Ally

     

     

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