Hi everyone, hope you guys have been well with me not here and that some soul who needed it was helped.

Let me see how the story format go and here is the last few weeks with the biopsy and how I was doing for the time till now.

Ooooh, my sister got her car back today, so I should probably have my car serviced

Biopsy Done & Dusted

Feelings While Unknown

Date: 2016-08-16

I was taken in and first weight, making me feel uncomfortable at the thought that someone else is seeing my weight and if I gained weight and I didn’t know about it, what can I say.  Also feeling more like I should eat, but yes fasting doesn’t work that much for me the foodie.

Nurses at this hospital which is open less than a year or around that time, are professional and full of smiles.  The one sees my lip gloss on and thinks it’s a lipstick.  Not at all and here they all start doing their faces, because apparently I can’t be the only person that is looking good at the hospital.

Fear strikes me more as hunger makes me think of all the crap that can go wrong.  First thing first, what if this is positive and I am told chemo, well we found something else.  Or the weirdest one of all, what the..................................................  and total silence.

I went with thought into my gown and thought that if I don’t calm down as in now, my stats might make me wait longer to have the operation done to remove this lump.  So I calmed down by watching tv, chatting to everyone around me and then the inevitable happened my surgery schedule was announced as changed.  Thinking what is wrong, as I was told, I realize that they were discussing that the child had eaten and needed to wait a few more minutes which made me think that I am closer to food if and when this happen so don’t look nervous or anything.

Went into the surgery theatre and was told the painful part was over and I asked what the doc was talking about only to find that he already had the drip on my arm.  Hahahahahahaaaaa, I don’t feel needles unless the idiot that does the drip line isn’t good at it, I will feel the needle as I look at them.  And asleep I am....

Woke up a while later, the first thing I do is take of the hair net, and make my hair right, second thing I do that was astounding was with a smile I asked if I can eat now, I’ve been waiting on food for the whole day already.  The medical staff just laughed and started chatting to me as they told me that I am still on the surgery floor, not back on the ward floor.  Somehow it was weird that I woke up with a smile and was perky.

Relief

Feeling relief that you know the thing is out that was making you sick and now the stressful part starts waiting on biopsies and getting in the doctor’s office for the follow up.  But relieved that the operation was a success and I would only be in pain from the surgery wound and nothing else.  Hoping for the blue moon and the sparkling oceans to stay calm too.

Date: 2016-08-22

Enter the doc’s office and I know what is going to happen, take off your clothes and let me examine you.  Therefore I dressed accordingly to make it easier to strip, yes like a strip dancer.

Does his examination as we do the pleasantries as to make me feel less uncomfortable to having a man next to me while naked.   And in the conversation he says, wound looks good and results negative.

What did you just say???  No Chemotherapy for me, and no hair loss, and no losing weight and explaining that I am sick and treating cancer.

Go home with a smile on my face and finding a doc I can trust in the mean time, okay so not all men are pigs as doctors.

Lots of love and hugs to boot from me.  Because little old confused me was kissed and I think I forgot how to kiss back, but after the initial shock I just let it happen and this was as in last night.  I’m getting to old for this crap, but I should probably allow a younger guy to show me what he got or not.  I can almost call myself A-sexual or anti sexual to the world.

Michele

Ps:  I was told on Wednesday 2016-08-24 that I am a model standing outside with a friend and this cute guy walks by.  Ooooh validating isn’t it, if his eyes is only fixed on me and not my friend.  And Thursday 2016-08-25 that another guy stopped me to chat with me and just blurted out for which modelling agency you working because you belong in the high fashion magazines and cat walks of fashion shows. I just laughed and said that I love the work that I do, but thank you for the complement.