Dear Emily,

The key words are "trustworthy friends" and "a few friends."

In my opinion, coming out gradually, starting with a few of your most trustworthy and supportive friends, is best.

Unfortunately, I wish I had this advice before coming out as a Lesbian. Listened to some poor advice and just jumped out, which was the worst thing I could do. Eventually, I recovered from my error.

Your friend,

Monica

I came out to my neighbor by accident yesterday. She's super chill about everything though, and she didn't even blink an eye. So here's the short story. I'm home, my 5 y/o is already asleep, and it's just before 7 pm. My 2y/o is still awake, and we're reading story books. I'm wearing a nice skirt and a tank top. My phone bings and tells me an Amazon package has arrived. I know that there's a new skirt and new shorts for me in it, so I really want to go get it. We decide to read the same story 5 more times. Now I'm really antsy so I tell him I just have to go get the package from outside and I'll be right back. Unfortunately it was delivered to my neighbors door (Amazon takes pictures now), and that's maybe 10 steps away. I close the door behind me, and scurry over to snatch the box. This is the very first time I've gone out my front door in a skirt. I'm very proud of myself. I hurry back. The door is locked. In the 10 seconds I was gone, my 2 y/o locked the door one my! The rest of the house is already locked up, so I can't get in! I have no keys, no phone, no nothing. Just my amazon box, and I'm wearing a skirt and a pink razorback tank top, and I'm locked out of my house! My 2 y/o starts crying and screaming immediately. I freak out. I put my shoulder into our weak door, but it won't budge. I go to the back yard to check the windows, but everything's locked. The shed is open though, so I grab a crow bar and set to work on the front door. But, I've never done this before, so I have no idea what I'm doing. I do some damage to the wood work, but still the door won't budge. My 2 y/o's cries get louder and he's obviously more freaked out than I am. I become frantic. I run back to the shed, grab duck tape, a screw driver and a rubber mallet. I tape over the kitchen window so it won't shatter, and hammer the screw driver into it. But I don't want the neighbors to call the cops either, so I try to keep it as soft as I can. The window doesn't break, and I don't want to go to jail. I run back to the front door and try to kick it in. Still doesn't work. Now I sink down in front of it in despair and start talking to my 2 y/o to try and calm him down. It takes a few minutes, but then I'm able to talk to him. After a while my neighbor comes out to check on the noise. She's seen everything out of her window already, and now finds me crying, in a skirt, on the door mat. Her pity and understanding is amazing. Together we talk to my little child, and eventually he figures out how to unlock the door. He's happy. My cries intensify a thousand fold, and I act like the mother who finally embraces her lost child. After a couple of minutes I'm able to stand up again, and give my neighbor many thanks. Just before we say goodbye she compliments me on how cute I look. I'm so elated that I start crying again, and it took me a good hour to calm down again.

So, now she knows, and I won't be as afraid anymore of gong out my front door!

Fabulous story, Emily! 

And good on you for coming out to a couple of friends. It is scary but it’s part of our journey. 

Best wishes,

Emma

I love your story!  One thing I've learned is that most of the world is really really compassionate and supportive about transgender;; they're just as nervous about being open, accepting, and expressing it as we are at first!   ❣️

Wow Emily! What an intense way to spend the evening! Great to get a compliment first time out too! 💜