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I was contemplating on what I should do for Facebook, create a new account or change the current male one so I created a new one but then thought that this is going to be tough getting friends over to the new account and stopped after creating the new female account last week. While surfing through my male account yesterday I decided to delete the new female account and change the male account to female via gender option then changed from my male name to my female name. Walked away and upon coming back a while later had several people had messaged me, some saw it coming while others did not but so far all are supportive of the change which includes former girlfriends. One thing I have been monitoring is friend count, see if any unfriend me but so far none have which I am thankful for. If any do unfriend me that is their choice which I respect but also realize they were never my friend in the first place. Anyways one of my things is not to simply accept people as friends for the heck of it like some do, instead I only allow those whom I think will be friends, are fellow instructors and/or have common interest. There is one woman I met on My Space, always wanted to date her, in my eyes she is simply hot which does not mean the best looking woman out there, instead I am simply attracted to her and let her know that. We never met but over time became friends in a different way and then when moving to Facebook she friended me. I was pleasantly surprised to find her as one of the first friends to like my note that I was now female, gave me a warm feeling. Another woman whom I feel that we have met in other lives (and she actually was the one who brought this up) and dated also made it known we will always be friends. Funny thing about her while in bed together after making love she says (don't remember the exact words as this was back in 2006) "In a former existence I was the male and you were the female, married and very happy" and thought that was interesting that she firmly believed I was female before. About six months ago I told her I wanted to chat with her over the phone. She gave me her phone number (saying in case you don't have it anymore, which I did) and said give me a call tomorrow. I called her, we chatted for awhile then told her what was going on. There was a slight pause then she came back and said, I will kill you if you look better than me and then said, well we should go out shopping sometime. Talked for about an hour and felt really good that we could do this. I did get a few messages from various friends that had many questions which I am still need to reply too as there were many but all positive. Two of the people who congratulated me are national figures in the world of teaching self-defense and actually was surprised that one did message me while the other one I had no doubt. Looking back several months I would had never guessed this announcement would had been so positive and happy it has gone well.

The police haven't sent me on training in while, and here its for the newest entry at work. So having had training in Shotguns, R5 Assault Rifles, RAP401 and Piettro Beretta Mod92 9mm Pistols a decade back, was like funny to for me the only girl with the hard ass guys I work with and some men I can sneeze over. 5 minutes later firearm training over, I know my firearm, so off to the shooting range. Why didn't you train the other stations people. This guy looks like he is afraid in front of me, well let me show him how it's done. 5 minutes later he is still struggling yo release the slide, how bad can he be. Can't wait to stand and shoot though. At the station prior to leaving the 2nd hands as I like to call them are a click that makes almost everybody believe they are the best, and before I or we (my group) get in a fight with them, lets just go in my car and drive the 80mile round trip. On the shooting range from the right to the left, the first 5 persons were the best of the best. The only girl in the mix, so Queen again. So after the first squeeze I realized this pistol isn't just lighter, but everything on it is lighter except for the new magazine that was still stiff. Being considered one of the guys that stands my ground in the face of danger. I sometimes wonder if I would've been accepted or an outcast if I couldn't shoot, fight or stand my ground. Yes, with certain guys the option of me driving are always open, with others I am the driver no matter what, because they can't drivr. The joke with the driving is, I drive a Chevrolet Spark 1.2L stick shift, and the vehicles at work are one tonners trucks or sometimes bigger, and very rarely smaller, but everything is at least 3ft longer. In cars I pick something that doesn't seem like I stole my dad's car and fits my personality. But seeing as I'm talking about firearms, I prefer a weapon that is comfortable to carry and shoot one handed too. Lastly, I don't believe a firearm yo be the first line of defense. I also know that when I draw my weapon it is in all likelihood going to be used, because it is my last option to protect myself and those lives around or with me. A weapon, be it a firearm, knife, sword, baton, or any form should only be used or carried when you feel comfortable the training you were given can be executed without a fault, and all consequences of you using that said weapon to inflict the minimum of damages to stop the said attacker. Because going around and thinking you indestructible because you were trained at using it, is the worst mentality you can have. Yes, be confident, know your strength and weaknesses with the weapon or your body. AND LASTLY REMEMBER TO BE SAFE, BECAUSE THERE WILL ALWAYS BE SOMEONE BETTER THAN YOU, IF IT IS BECAUSE OF FOCUS OR ABILITY. WEAPONS ARE NOT TOYS, BUT AN EXTENSION OF YOUR HAND AND CAPABILITIES IN A FIGHT. Okay, all I wanted to do was gloat that I passed. But I did it all while ensuring my safety and that of those around me. And I still looked feminine and adorable. Doesn't mean I like guy stuff I jave to look like them, I'm a girl by nature that doesn't like taking crap from anybody.

I got asked to write to write Trans Articles for Redditch LGBT on Friday, I had already got 2 presentations on coming out and my journey from cross dresser to Trans Woman so I altered them a little and sent them off, hopefully they'll be posted soon. Redditch LGBT is in it's infancy, it's aims are to promote that not every one is straight white heterosexual & for people to get over the fact. Also it wants to promote a LGBT friendly area within Redditch, which is sadly missing presently except for Cafe Mambo, at the moment LGBT people mostly go to Birmingham. Par for the course, it's been started by a local Labour Councillor, whom I met and had a long chat with. My Wife and I had a day out on Saturday, she's very keen on victorian history, and is part way through writing a novel set in that period, so we visited 3 museums in Worcestershire. No one read me as far as I could tell (Schodinger's pass again!), and we both enjoyed the exhibits. In one of the museums, there are exhibits of Worcestershire regiments through the ages to the present day. One area was dedicated to the first world war, there are a collection of government posters urging men to join the army, for glory and heroism etc., alongside was an exhibit telling of soldiers sentenced to death by firing squad for cowardice etc., when in fact they were shell shocked. It bought it home to me how little has changed, with goverment propaganda, and how hypocrisy is still rife amongst politicians. However recently there has been a serving Captain in the British Army who has Transgendered whilst serving, here's the link to a video made by her and a private; http://www.allaboutt...re-experiences/ Anyway whilst it show's the fantastic progress being made in some areas of UK life, it's important to realise that this progress has largely come about due to the previous Labour governments commitment to the Equality act which in turn originated from EU Equal Treatment Directives. Whilst the present government has done little to further promote equality, other that to state that it promotes Trans people being integrated into society, but other than the bland statement, there is no evidence of anything having been done. I guess it's not in their true interests. I have been sent a document about the Transgendering process here in the UK, I have sent it to two people within Transgender Guide, one of whom didn't answer. The other said I should provide a link to it on my blog. However I must warn you that there is bad language in it, so if you're a delicate little thing or easily offended, please don't read it. It doesn't exactly mirror my experience with Charing Cross Gender Identity Clinic, which has been mostly positive, but having said that, it is funny and it pokes fun at the system. It appears that the upload file size has been reduced and I can no longer upload the file, so here's the link to it; http://bytenoise.co....ra-and-hope.pdf Perhaps a similar document might be put together by a member about the US system? That's all for now, Eve x

That's really nice Karen, I'm glad it went well for you. People can be very surprising and pleasantly do things that you wouldn't have expected them to do.........

Well we call these "creeps" Tranny Chasers here in the UK. I can't ever imagine doing sex with a man, it quite frankly turns me off! I can't see what my wife saw in me as a man before we married. It's only since I have transgendered that I have come to think this way. When I went to the gender clinic I asked to become a lesbian! Women are more gentle and loving and frankly amazing! That of course includes trans Women.

Create your own blog at TGGuide.com. It's FREE and you can start right now. Some people blog as a sort of journal to share our thoughts, feelings, experiences and insights. Others blog to express opinions on social and political issues. Others blog to share their knowledge and experience with others. Go ahead. Express yourself! Others may be grappling with issues you blog about and your words could provide useful insight or answers. Here are some blog topic ideas to get your creative juices flowing; A daily journal about your life and experiences A journal documenting when you go full time A journal to document your gender reassignment surgery Dating experiences and tips Crossdressing tips Experience with makeup Passing in public Your experiences when you go out in public Restroom experiences Transitioning at work Dealing with counselors or medical personnel Introspection about your particular gender identity Dealing with or overcoming self-limiting beliefs Dealing with addictions Dealing with self-destructive behaviors Interactions with police or government workers Changing your drivers license, birth certificate, etc. Applying for jobs Your big day, when you go full time Hormonal development (please don't discuss dosages or make medical type recommendations) Experiences with electrolysis How other members of your new gender react to you, and your experiences Your recommendations to others about to follow your path Your thoughts about whether surgery is necessary to be your desired gender Differences in how you feel dressed or not dressed What your life would be like if you still repressed your inner identity Poetry or prose These are a few ideas to get you started. Feel free to leave comments to suggest your own ideas, or just start a blog and share with everyone. Just log into your control panel to start your own blog. This could be interesting!

When I was younger, I was happy to find that some guys are attracted to transgender girls. After all, there are guys that like cis girls, guys that like guys, etc, so I just reasoned that it's just as natural for some guys to like transgender girls. I've had my crushes throughout school just like anyone else does. I thought how nice it would be if someone felt the same way about me. One of my friends told me "there's somebody for everybody, right?" She didn't realize that many things are more complicated for #girlslikeus. It didn't take me long to realize that many of the guys that I seemed to attract were different somehow. Not all, but most didn't seem to be interested in me as a person or really want to get to know me as a person. I sadly started to realize that these particular guys weren't seeing me as a romantic partner, not a girl to take ice skating, dance with, watch movies together, spend quite time side by side on the couch with, or exchange Valentine's cards with. I was fairly young when I started hearing from older girlfriends about how transgender women are seen as fetish objects to a lot of men. I already knew that woman are often objectified as sex objects and thought it was the same thing, sort of. I told myself that was just a few creeps, so just stay away from them...not a big deal. The right boy will come along. I later came to see these creeps as predators. They will tell you what you want to hear and treat you just good enough to get what they think they're going to get. This threatens me, my womanhood, my self worth as a human being. I still think he is out there, but after years of contact with guys....ones that swear they just want love, a relationship, a soul mate, only for them to turn out to be one of "those." I am letting some bad experiences influence my interaction with guys that I meet. Without even knowing them, I often judge them as one of the creeps. I have dated a couple (exactly three) amazing guys, two in highschool and one after starting college, so my dreams are still alive. However, years of interaction with the predators, in person, on social sites, forums and chat rooms have gotten to me, not that I would ever meet anyone from online. Not a chance. It's just the idea...the reality of it all. This is one of the reasons that I am here on TGGuide, which has been a very positive experience for me. I feel like here, I can discuss issues, interact with other girls, and talk about my feelings and experiences without someone asking me for pictures in my underwear. Yay! The "fetish" aspect is one of the complications of dating for #girlslikeus, but there are others. It's not the most heartbreaking. The social stigma attached to dating a girl that was born (and especially if she still is) anatomically male is another big thing. It's a lot of pressure for guys, no matter how good their intentions. I have lost a couple good relationships to their fear of what people will think and that is what probably stops some nice guys from approaching us in the first place. I will fully transition when I graduate from college. I don't want to give the wrong impression, I'm not doing it to find love and a husband. I need to do this for me, no one else and it is what I've been moving toward my whole life. I do think though, that the chances of romantic happiness and love are better for those that have fully transitioned. Post op women do get married and are living the dream. Janet Mock has an amazing guy and will soon be married as many other have. So, i'm interested in what others think on the subject, and you're experiences are with dating and love. Do you think it's likely to find love as a transwoman? What have your experiences been with men? Are so many men as just creepy as I think they are? I'm also curious to hear from those that Identify as "trans-lesbians." I sometimes think that it would be easier to be attracted to girls. It's hard to see cis-women as being the kind of creepy that some men are,or as likely to fetishize and, devalue another person, or as worried of what people would think of them. Thanks for reading <3 KM

I was just reading Emmasweet’s latest blog post and realized how fortunate I am to have found this safe haven unlike no other on the web. Not to leave anyone out but Monica, Emma, UsernameOptional and Lori are wonderful people and if you have not looked at other sites this one is the best. Way too many focus on one or two high level topics of interest unlike this one. Well this entry was not meant to win any awards, just wanted to put this out there

In my past career when we said that we were “falling on my sword” we meant that – typically in front of a customer – we were admitting that our company or product was at fault. We were being transparent, vulnerable, admitting we were in the wrong and hopefully the customer would thus react with less drama and instead collaborate on working around or developing a solution to the problem. This blog post feels like that to me, thus its title. Of late I’ve been reading “Crossdressing With Dignity: The Case for Transcending Gender Lines” by Dr. Peggy Rudd, who previously wrote “My Husband Wears My Clothes.” She is a psychologist who happens to have a transgender husband, and because of this developed a personal and professional understanding of what it means to be transgender for the individual and for the family. The basis for the book is that crossdresser/transgender people are not wrong or bad although society may cast them in this light. Perhaps worse, these transwomen tend to be their own worst critic because of internalized shame, guilt, and fear. Carrying that load is sensed by others around us and often reflected back, confirming those cruel assumptions and beliefs. I’ve sensed this off and on throughout my life. I know that I am too dependent on external feedback and opinions. Who cares what they think! I’m my own person, right? And I can stand on my own feet. Oh yeah, sure. At times like this I find that easy to say and darned hard to believe. Below are some quotes from the book and some corresponding thoughts. Perhaps through this I (and you?) will make some progress. “In our society men are taught from an early age that they must never be like girls. Because of the awareness or knowledge, you may fail to accept crossdressing as a part of your personality. There is that subconscious rule that says you are doing something wrong.” – Roger Peo, PhD. I think I was happiest before around age 4 or 5 before I realized that part of the way I was, how I liked to play, was sissy and wrong. I was often reminded of this by neighborhood boys whom I desperately wanted to be friends with but who seemed to delight in tearing me apart with their ridicule. “The search for normalcy is a very strong motivator. Each person wants to find love, and sometimes they are willing to absorb guilt rather than lose love.” I’ve always longed for normalcy, wondered why I wasn’t, and am often hyperaware of how I believe others think of me. And indeed, closeting my shame and feelings from my wife, friends, and associates to protect what feels like such tenuous love and caring. “The guilt related to the erotic nature of crossdressing is a major concern for many.” Guilt and shame, not only from within and from my wife, but also worried that it will rain down on me from the transgender community as it seems that the fetish aspect of crossdressing is one of the shameful secrets that we don’t talk about. So here’s a major hara-kiri (seppuku) confession: I do have some fantasy and erotic feelings about crossdressing. Whatcha think about that? Not always, but it can be pretty thrilling. “Progress always involves risks. You can’t steal second base and keep your foot on first.” – Frederick Wilcox Okay, that saying makes sense of course. It’s easy to say as it kind of rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it? And yeah, I have come out to my wife over the past few months and to this day I don’t know if I did the right thing. You call that progress? Okay, enough of the downers. Here’s a couple of quotes showing what we’re aiming for: “When you can think of yesterday without regret, and tomorrow without fear, you have found true dignity.” “The key to having a rich and full life is self-acceptance, a virtue found only within.” So, how to get there? Dr. Rudd includes lists of steps from a variety of people who responded to her research questionnaire. Here’s one that I liked. Remember to have a sense of humor. Learn to be in touch with whom you are. Start believing you have the freedom to express the total personality. Share your guilt and fears with someone you trust. Be a good listener when other people share their feelings with you. Remember there are other people out there with similar problems. I think I need to have these tattooed on my arms for handy reference. Be well, Emma

Thanks for sharing Emma, lots of wisdom here.

Karen, I'm not surprised that you got many hits from guys. You are a beautiful women. I am curious if you have ever felt like you have been fetishized by a woman. I would think that it's possible, but not as likely as with men. Thank you for your input:) KM

Class went extremely well and have been invited back to teach again next month. Several of the students indicated they were sure there would be bruising tomorrow on their arms. I mention this because it happens in every class, hit your partner time and time again over four hours and it is bound to happen. I was mindful of my condition so only did a few techniques that took someone down to the ground and said I would show that in the next class when I have recovered fully.

Good to hear your views on firearms, especially with firearm safety and that the firearm is not the first thing you go to for defense. I have been teaching "Use of Force", firearm safety and all disciplines of firearms from handguns to shotguns to tactical rifle to civilians, police and military for the past 15 years. One constant is that the average civilian does not fully embrace is the finality of what happens when using a firearm in a situation while the majority of professionals absolutely understand this. The following page is something I put together to assist in teaching other instructors to lecture on firearm safety. http://kevininstructor.home.comcast.net/~kevininstructor/FirearmSafety/FiveHabits.html I have a short statement that embodies when you can use deadly force for civilians. In order for deadly force to be justified there must be an immediate, otherwise unavoidable danger of death or grave bodily harm to yourself or other innocents. Deadly force is that force which could reasonably be expected to cause death or grave bodily harm. Of course police use necessary force while civilians it's equal force. My perspective in female and males in the realm of working in LE (Law Enforcement) is many times portrayed incorrectly to the general public in television shows and movies in that they are not capable of standing their ground but it the completely opposite with firearms when the are dedicated to being a true professional. I have yet to be on the shooting line with police officers as a female but can say that it could go one of two ways and that all depends on knowing the attitude and mindsets of the officers' but can calculate it would not be an issue for me as I am well versed with firearms and have the experience to stand up, show techniques with a full size 1911, Glock 19 or revolvers. The only thing males have over females is the average male build, nothing else.

I am into females but last week decided to see what interest there was for a post-op on Match dating service. Thought that there would be zero hits especially when the first line in my introduction said "To start off, I was born a male and just made the transition to female through surgery". Did not check for hit until three days later and had about 20 'likes', 'winks' and email messages. I could not reply as I am a free member thinking way pay 14.99 per month when there would be no hits. Well I'd say about three quarters appeared (but sure) to be after the fetish thing. Guess I will never know because I am not really into men. So my feeling is many are into it for the fetish. Think I will stick with females and have no doubt that I will find someone as there are already females who have expressed interest in me.

Karen, may I suggest that you create a DVD set for those that can not attend your classes . . .

Am a cisgender (born female) Lesbian, and was very happily involved with a transwoman who identified as a Lesbian for ten years. Frankly, I am sick of the politics of the cisgender Lesbian community and prefer transwoman Lesbians. Recommend exploring http://www.TGPersonals.com, as I feel it is one of the most wholesome transgender dating websites. Just a warning, though, you will find a few creeps in even the best Internet dating websites. Don't give up!

I listen with a compassionate ear , and with a reminiscing grin I partake. These are the words that came to mind while attending a pre- Valentine Day Trans Girls Dinner Party especially for couples. There were some spouses and girlfriends there who have never ventured out with there companion while dressed in fem. The tension was definitely in the faces of many , but as time went on the atmosphere became more and more relaxed . A little wine does help , but as those wives and girlfriends opened up to other couples with the same issues as to what they have been experiencing in there own lives. The evening became very much sociable and rather enjoyable. Outside pressures, anxiety, family responsibilities, depression, the ambiguity of love; these are some of the social issues pressing couples in a trans girl relationship with there companion. One trans girl told me how her spouse was so upset over her breast implant , because the operation produced a size bigger than was expected . Another expressed how she just found out about her companion 4 weeks prior and how she cannot believe here she is at a dinner party with other trans girls. A third expressed how her companion was not gay , and she would not stay in the relationship if she was. Lastly a forth said I do not want this trans girl thing to get out to my friends and my children. There are plenty more examples of social drama within the conversations that night. I give so much applaud to the wives and girlfriends for attending . There courage , there showing of love to make a effort to keep there relationship going was remarkable. Roses were handed out to each companion for the Valentines Day Event. I will end by saying '' Thorns run the length of the stem of a rose , but what is most appreciated and admired is the loving beauty of the flower on top.''............... '' We are here to love & be loved . ''

hi how to start this blog firstly im from elgin ,moray,uk was born a while ago saffice to say im in my very very late 20,s(51) when i was growing up any fancy dress party or the likes of halloween i would put on my mams (mom) clothes then by 11 my mam bought some new and weirdly fascinating tights(pantyhose) dont know what it was but i fell in love with the desire to wear them so one day i did and started to dress a lot when my mam & dad where out however that could not last forever on the whole it was a wonderful time in my life all i needed was some support as i say it could not last forever one halloween a friend from school caught me while i was out trick or treatimng kinda weird when you are 15 still out dressed up but hey . but that wasnt the only thing when i was at one of my friends house we would pretend to be out clubbing or being a naughty nurse they never had to look far for a surrogate girl if you like thank god his sister had panties and tights as well as skirts that fitted weird thing was when i was 16 i just asked my friend what would he do if when we were older if i came back as a woman what would he do he said he would beat me up. a little later in life as i could not hide my desires any longer in the uk we have a paper called the sun ther was an agony aunt called deirdre so i wrote to her telling her my desire nae my wish to be out in public dressed up with or without make-up her reply dissapionted me though she never told me not to she did say that in her opinion i would not be able to do that until i had gone off this mortal coil "bitch" funny though i defied her odds still alive and have dressed full time 24/7 in skirts tights with and without make-up. so here i am having gone through bigotry and ignorance and a lot of new freinds feeling stronger and looking forward to the future