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I feel so sorry for you, and I don't know what I could say that might bring a crumb of comfort to you, but I have found that life is so full of strange coincidences, do we each have a guardian angel watching over us? I have often thought so.................... Truly hope you get over your period of grief soon. Eve

I slipped out of my grief last night after engrossing myself in several activities and talking to my daughter's best friend. I am sure it will happen again and that is okay for too feel nothing would bother me even more.

My Dear Friends, I had a nightmare childhood, and I am grateful I have found reconciliation with both my parents before they died. Sadly, although things have improved with my brothers (I have no sisters), we have a long ways to go. Eve, as for Guardian Angels, I believe they are REAL, and that the average person has not only one, but THREE! They never sleep and ALWAYS are alert, even when we sleep!! Your friend, Monica

This might sound ridiculous, it sounds ridiculous to me now. Last summer ((heatwave in northern Europe), yes even in rainy old Britain!), before I made the decision to present full time as female, I had to wear a gynecomastia vest to hide my boobs! Bizarre a M to F trans binding his/her boobs......yes it was ridiculously hot, sweaty, and even worse when I wear a wig. So I know your discomfort, I also know, now that I am full time femme, that I can't go swimming because my wig will likely float off! Yes, Summer sucks as you have said............. Cheers, Eve

Bon Voyage! It's both difficult at times, and so rewarding and amazing at other times. Hope all goes well for you, Cheers, Eve

Tampons are optional. After dilation I was leaking lubrication for the first month and was told not to clean inside the vagina too much so a friend suggested trying using Tampons and sure enough no leakage, instead the lube was absorbed by the Tampons. Currently I am pass this so just a light weight pad is used. First I was using several a day now down to two a day and after next month when I go from three times a day to two times a day dilation I might be down to one pad a day, will see. I do use a fresh one prior to going to bed just to be safe. It is amazing how much is absorbed by Always pads and still stay dry next to the skin.

Warren, it's always good to hear from you. I respect your taking it a day at a time to get to your surgery. It's hard to wait and deal with all the heat and discomfort I'm sure. Each day and a few dollars here and there gets you a little closer. Big hugs to you, Emma

Thanks Karen for the very frank information, yes it makes sense to me now. Eve

Thanks. So far I hadnt found any that didnt look rediculous, or they didnt fit my bust size

Don't know if they exist, but I wonder if there are men's one piece swimsuits. If I find it, I will let you know.

Thanks Veronica

Karen, I read this after what TJDavies wrote in the shout box yesterday, 28th about his Dad bringing him some grub. I understand about missing someone who is beyond the veil between they're days and ours. I miss my brother "Rocky" and I never met him. My Mom who is with him now used to tell me he was my guardian Angel. I can only say this. That your Sister was lucky to have someone who cared about her so much. I think that the Karen I have come to know, was luckyto have a Sister, period. I am glad I have and had them. I also think your Sister wouls agree with me, tha having Karen in her life, made it a better life. That they still speak to us and influence us from beyond the veil is perfectly natural for me to accept. One the thing about having family members descend from native American culture, they know the way home. Also, that when dealing with grief, I have found that it may leave me alone from time to time, but it never actually leaves. I wouldn't want it any other way. Shedding a tear over someone I love is never a tear wasted. HUGE HUgs! Veronica Beta.