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The advice my mom gave me is, 'unless they need to know do not tell them and no one needs to know". It is your choice.

Dear Karen, You are wise to get the tooth removed and the one behind it, as it seems like there was an infection (abscess) under the tooth, and it usually affects nearby teeth. Having them removed prevented further problems. May I suggest the Sonicare electric toothbrush http://www.philips.com http://www.sonicare.com as I feel that Sonicare electric toothbrushes are the best brand available, and are an excellent investment in you dental health. Get well soon. Yours truly, Monica

Hi Monica, I have been using OralB purchased in 2005. The lady who cleans my teeth and the dentist told me I should not use toothpaste when cleaning but use a small amount as I have been so use to toothpaste. As to investment in dental health, have one dentist and a specialist for around the past 15 years.

Well Nicky I can't "like this" on what happened to you as that is tragic, hopefully the VA will come through for you and don't have to fight too much for them.

I hated to have my removed .. but something over seas killed all my teeth and they all had to be pulled... fighting to get dentures from the VA

Yes, I had a relatively bumpy stretch of path when I got all my doc's changed, but I just persevered............hope yours is smoothr than mine was..........

SPeaking of 2 identities (from your first comment Eve), I really can't wait until my legal name change goes through, it will remove the last bits of confusion over which name I need to or should use. Obviously with doctors I still need to use my old name, although most of them put Christie in the file. Today I bought a futon and realized it was easier to just use my old name, as that's the name on the credit card and this was a one-time interaction (though after the fact I realized that it might have seemed odd to him that I look like I do and have a very male name). It'll be nice when I'm legally Christie and have all my documents in order :-)

Well, seeing as there are only two types of men, those who masturbate and those who lie, I have to admit to having been an honest man, when I was such a being! Now seeing that in my case m to f transistion wasn't instantaneous (who's is?) my former honest habits stayed with me for quite a while! But my orgasms got less and less fluid as transition progressed, this during the period when I was solely taking oestrogen. As soon as Decapeptyl injections started they soon became dryer and dryer within a few weeks they were totally dry and have been ever since. Yes I needed some sort of stimulation otherwise I wasn't at all interested. However, I do have an overwhelming desire to find out if chocolate is indeed better than sex, as so many females have often claimed................! or are they being dishonest? LoL Eve oxo...........

It's interesting, I was thinking before that I should try to see if I can climax - the interest has been so non-existent I haven't even tried, but I do want to see if the functioning is there or not.

I think it's wise to track changes. For me I never noticed small changes as I was (and didn't realize it) pretty much female hormonally even before hormones. My first test for HRT indicated I was just above the low side for a cisgender female. In regards to sex drive, I learned that it did not go away and did a test each week to see if I could still climax. I would pleasure myself fully tucked which meant I could not wrap my hand around that unwanted thing between my legs. For the entire year prior to surgery I still would climax and would add that I needed erotic thoughts else nothing would transpire. That is an important element, one must have thoughts for arousal to take place. Same is true after GRS, something arouses me and within seconds after seeing or hearing something that spawns arousal everything is pinpointed to my clit and radiates outwards. If there is nothing to arouse than I could go a week or so and nothing happens. It's all in the mind and what it conjures up for the physical to be triggered into that fun state. Anyways keep up your updates, love to hear them.

Yes it's hard work presenting as something that you're not, and life gets so very complicated when you then have 2 identities to try to compensate for not being who you really are and want so much to be............... I'm so glad that things are starting smooth out in your life. However beware of a few bumps in the road that you have chosen to travel, but don't let them knock you off your chosen path. Cheers, Eve

Hello Monica. Somebody's Size, Does Not Matter, Especially When It Comes To Friends. Monica, I Would Be Proud To Be Seen With You, At Any Time. You Are My Friend, And You Also Have A Heart Of Gold. I Take People As Individuals, Regardless Of Their Race; Creed; Colour; Religion; Gender; Sexuality; Or Size ! It Is The Whole Person That Matters, And By That, I Mean What Somebody Is Like Inside, As Well As Outside. Monica, Have A Great Day, Speak Soon. Take Care My Friend, And Very Best Wishes, Stephanie. xoxo

Dear Ben, Learn all you can about "adrenal fatigue," by googling and YouTubing it. Notice with myself I gain pounds and then inches (or vice versa) alternately, and it is the same when I lose weight. Also noticed recently I am dealing with bloating, which can be caused by glucose intolerance (even by eating too much sweet fruit) and lactose intolerance (eating too much dairy). Have accepted that I am a big woman, and other can or can not accept that. When it comes to dating, I am drawn to women my own size, and I notice people are drawn to friends and partners near their own size. Can understand that with lovers, but not with friends! Go figure!! Ben, you are a handsome man, and I feel that a lot of skinny and thin girls will find you handsome! May I suggest that you develop a talent, such as singing, playing an instrument, joining a band, etc. Those kinds of talents get people away from the physical and into who and what you really are! Your friend, Monica

Update: I've been hitting the gym every other day. I've lost 8 pounds in the last month. I'm not expecting anyone to compliment me, but it's frustrating that they need to comment. They weigh me fully clothed of course i'm gonna weigh more and some how i'm always 240. At the gym and on my home scale I weigh 228-230. that's kind of a big difference.

Dear Ben, Agree with Karen about frustration with weight. As long as you are doing everything to manage your weight, you will have to acknowledge that it is on the DOCTOR who is criticizing you, rather than on YOU. Feel in the coming years and decades that there will be real answers as to why some are slim and trim and others have a tendency to put on the pounds. Have a slim and trim doctor who does NOT nag me about my weight because she knows I am doing all I can to manage it, but if she did, I would seek out a doctor of size (preferably female). We are ALL different and all beautiful, each in our own way! Your friend, Monica

Dear Ben, Please consider testosterone as serious as surgery. Set up a SECOND and THIRD opinion NOW, so, even though you have to wait a long time, the second and third opinion will likely be close together. Am very sorry about your doctor's reluctance, but she may have had second thoughts due to fear of liability. Don't ask HER for referrals for the second and third opinion but a doctor that you TRUST. Your friend, Monica