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So my insurance has told me flat out (cant remember if I told you guys but here's a recap) no. Unless my ID says female, they will not consider my application for surgery assistance. They can only process it as male, which would go under cosmetic which they dont cover SO, I called the DMV for my state and talked to them. I asked them "I have already changed my ID to my identifying gender. Can I change it back temporarily and then put it back to my current gender later?" Odd question, naturally. So after I talked to the woman about it and explained my situation, she understood but then asked "Wait..your gender is already changed? Without your bottom surgery?" I said yes. "The law for our state dictates that you cannot change your gender without bottom surgery....Did you falsify paperwork??" Um. WHAT?! NO! We hashed it out and I had to talk to an officer AND their supervisor and we sorted out the issue. Apparently when I got my gender marker changed, it was in a matter of HOURS before the law was effective and therefor my ID IS legal and I avoid a 5k$ state fine for False Identification and Falsifying State Paperwork and information. Scary!!!! But we talked about it and she basically said that my ID is on the edge of a cliff. I'm safe if I leave it alone, but if I switch it now--I wont be able to switch it back afterwards without bottom surgery. WHAT!? So now my ID is stuck the way it is, so I cannot change it for insurance. On top of that though, she did advise that I go and find a lawyer and talk to them about my Transgender Protection rights for our state with State Insurance as it is usually policy not to deny Transgender Surgeries because it being "cosmetic." So, recap. I almost got fined 5k$ but I wont be fined because I got there before closing. My ID is fine and I do not have to change it. I cannot change it without it being a problem (also that puts my Doc at risk for false info if I ask her to sign off on it a second time). Get a lawyer (I dont have the funds for that...) and keep saving up money on my gofundme account. So basically...I got no where. And the 20 tries to call my homestate in regards to STILL not having a revised Birth Certificate ended up with a busy signal every time. So they're dragging their rears, same as always. Dude, it's been over a year already! LETS GO, TURKEYS! As a side note, I have 483$ saved up for my surgery. Then I realized that I need 500$ just for a day reservation fee, so none of that money actually goes into the 9k$ needed for the surgery itself. Oi vey.... I'm so tired of running in circles....x.x This long path is turning into a quest of unbelievable extent. Ren (Gofundme.com/givewarrenahand)

Hi Lisa, It's very nice to hear from you although I wish it was under better circumstances. That is so surprising that he'd just up and leave you like that, no explanation, no talk, just go. But good for you how you are handling it so well. Crying helps and is good for you. We all feel it when we are vulnerable and then rejected. And it hurts so much that sometimes it feels like it would be better to just seal ourselves off, protect ourselves. I think that is part of grieving and that's okay too for a while. I have a friend who is a folk singer, she says that at these times we need a cup of tea and a nap. That helps me sometimes although it's not perfect. Regardless we are always here for you. Warm hugs, Emma

Monica, Thank you! I have been trying to get my wife to go to counseling or support groups for families and spouses and she has thus far resisted. I think you are right about being drawn to my "feminine energy". It's interesting, but several ex-girlfriends have said that breaking up with me was their biggest regret. I think many love my sensitive side but sexually need a man, so it just doesn't work out.