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Hello there! I'm CT Flynn, a transgender male. I also have another interesting thing about me called Autism, I'm sure you've heard of it. Anyway, I made this blog to help myself cope with being stuck in the Closet surrounded by an extremely religious family and possibly my journey of coming out. I am currently in high school where I have many supportive friends but also many non-supportive people. Anyway, thanks for reading!

When I did my legal name change last year I had a count of 50+ places that I had to make the update (then I stopped counting, it was too stressful), but you're right, it does keep coming up. I haven't even thought as much about who has records of my gender! (Aside from the obvious ones, drivers license, birth certificate, etc.). When I contacted North Carolina State Univ. (where I did my undergrad) to change my name they actually asked if I wanted to update my gender as well - it hadn't occurred to me that they would even have that, but it makes sense. I throw that story in partly to show that even in North Carolina not everyone is transphobic :-) (Of course my sister lives there now, and she is transphobic, oh well)

Therapy was interesting today. A couple sessions ago I told my therapist that I was trans yet it seems like nothing changed. She still calls me She/Her and uses my birthname no matter how many times I tell her. I've almost given up on it but I know I can't let it get the best of me. Some how that thought offers little comfort.

Hey CT! Welcone to TGGuide! Good idea to start a blog, write down what's going on in your life and gender journey. It's heloed many of us tremendously. You say your from a very religious family; this video by Mark Yarhouse, where he is telling religious leadership about transgender and gender dysphoria, may be interesting for you: http://qideas.org/videos/transgender-1/ Please feel welcome to look around our forums and blogs, add your voice and questions wherever you'd like. We're here to help each other. Emma

Welcome to TGGuide! It sounds like you have some real challenges, I'm sure you'll find a lot of support here

Hi Chrissy, Gender Odyssey (http://www.genderodyssey.org/) is, from what I can tell and have been told, is an excellent conference for all transgender people. I've been encouraged that it's much more than a supportive and fun environment to present en femme, which is how another recent conference in Port Angeles was described. Check it out! Let me know if by chabce you can come, I'd love to meet you in person. Emma

Hi everyone, Since I took another step in socializing today, I thought I'd post something about that topic generally. Before coming out and transitioning, I had identified as a gay man. As such, my social life was largely built around the "gay community." I hadn't thought too much about that initially, since coming out and transitioning are pretty time-consuming for a while, and it was generally easier to do that while staying within a familiar social environment. But I knew it was going to have to change - although I admit to having some thoughts in the past about seeing it being Lesbian could work for me, I knew it wasn't right (I was leaning that way because (1) I have a little bi-sexual tendency, and (2) I thought it would be easier to meet a woman who would accept me as a woman in a romantic relationship than a straight man). Anyway - since I would like to date at some point, and even be in a relationship, I knew that I was going to have to break out of the LGBTQ "bubble" that I was in, and I have taken some steps. It helped that I did have a couple of straight female friends. And then of course I started school so I started meeting new people, many of them straight. Then, for after-school relaxation I started going to a little jazz bar in the Village. Today I took an even bigger step - at least in my head - I had joined a new tennis league (I had already belonged to an LGBT tennis group), and today I had my first match with someone from that group. I'm in a women's division, so initially that's who I'm going to meet, but that's a good starting place. It made me a little anxious since she had no way of knowing that I'm transgender going in, and not knowing how she might react. Well, she didn't. There was absolutely no awkwardness, it was great - and it was a really good tennis match (we had to play all 3 sets, and we were going point for point most of the way). There are still temptations to reach back and cling to the social world that I knew - but I have to give up some of that (not all of it, I'm not just ditching all of my friends!) xoxo Chrissy

That all sounds great :-) I can definitely relate to the fear and exhilaration- personally I didn't consider it to be a line between the two, I just saw it as both things happening at the same time. There is a lot to be excited about, and a lot to be afraid of - but overall living authentically is worth it all!!! What is Gender Odyssey? I'm planning to go to the Trans Health Conference in Philadelphia again this year, this time on the professional track (since i'm a social work student it seemed right)